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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28387137">Fall For Me | NAMJOON</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/myshatae/pseuds/myshatae'>myshatae</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Badass female character, Brother Park Jimin, Dancer Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, F/F, F/M, Kim Namjoon | RM-centric, Kim namjoon / original female character, M/M, Questioning Sexuality, Short Chapters, Slow Romance, Teacher Kim Namjoon | RM, Underground Rapper Min Yoongi | Suga</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 14:28:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>45,375</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28387137</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/myshatae/pseuds/myshatae</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Park Soomi is what the dictionary deems as a 'tomboy', and she's also an extremely confused human being. Confused about college, the English language, her own wild nature, her utterly unfathomable sexuality, and her new teacher slash advisor Kim Namjoon. Mainly, Kim Namjoon. </p><p> </p><p>!!you can also find this story on my wattpad profile, myshatae!!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. He's my first kiss</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>This was going to be another ordinary day, that's what I thought.</p><p>Although, you know what they say? It always comes crashing down when you least expect something, because never had I ever imagined to see him, the person I hoped to never see again. </p><p>It was yet another day in class, and I was making doodles on the last page of my notebook. That was as far as my creativity ever went. Students were making the classroom turn into a chaos, and then suddenly the noise stopped making me realize that the professor had entered. I still didn't look up from my notebook. </p><p>
  <i>Two horns in the head and I'll be done drawing our professor, should I add yet another horn? </i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>A voice rang in the air making the class become quieter. My ears parked up as I slowly started coloring the horns with my mechanical pencil. </p><p>"As you know students, professor Cha has taken a long vacation of three weeks to recover from his stomach surgery."</p><p>I stopped. Keeping my eyes down on the horrible doodle I had made, suddenly feeling bad because I didn't even know the professor was sick and had undergone a massive surgery to take that big of a time off, when he never missed a lecture by a minute.</p><p>It was the dean of our faculty, the corpulent man with a bulging stomach and receding hairline. I could tell even without looking because of his groggy voice that somehow matched his appearence. </p><p>"The classes has to go on. Your professor recommended him— his student that recently got his master's degree with the highest CGPA in the history of the English literature and arts department, from university of Seoul, and soon to obtain a PHD degree. He'll be a substitute teacher for these three weeks. He's young but don't judge his teaching ability by that." The dean softly chuckled after completing his announcement. </p><p>"Hello, I'm Kim Namjoon. I'll be your English literature teacher for three weeks, hope we will all get along fine!" </p><p>My pencil dropped from my hand as I looked up. That voice— it couldn't be. </p><p>But it was. No, this couldn't be happening. </p><p>I blinked hard staring ahead at the guy in blue shirt, full sleeves rolled up to his arms, and formal pants. A huge grin plastered across his face, dark brown hair brushing down to his forehead. </p><p>His eyes wandered around the classroom, scanning the eyes of every student. Then they landed on mine. The dean had already left the room, silence was still in the air, and, even though the classroom was filled with students, it felt like only me and him were here. </p><p>"You!" He mouthed but no sound came out. The fat book he had in his hands fell on the ground with a loud thud instead. </p><p>My eyes were already wide as if they were shooting up to my forehead. </p><p>How and why? </p><p>Why was the guy I had accidentally kissed the other day, standing there only a few feet away, staring right into my eyes? And how the hell did this happen! </p><p>Because the only thing that stopped me from digging up the ground and burying myself in it was reassuring myself thinking he was a stranger. </p><p>Yes, I kissed a stranger that day. </p><p>It was my very first kiss, that wasn't stolen by a girl considering how gayish people always confirmed I was. But a guy.</p><p>Now he was right in front of me. </p><p>I couldn't look at him. I kept my head down and the class went on. I couldn't be more glad because the dude-I-accidentally-kissed-that-turned-out-to-be-my-teacher didn't make a scene. He did seem like the dumb type at first glance, but, if he really was dumb he wouldn't be taking our class now. </p><p>It was me who was dumb, an absolute idiot and a possible criminal offender now too.</p><p>I bit on my bottom lip hard, shooting daggers at the book opened before me. My mind was completely elsewhere; actually days before, when the incident— more like accident, occurred.</p><p>It was another painfully ordinary day and I had a date, with my friend, sadly because I had no boyfriend, or a girlfriend. On weekdays like that, I had no other job than to binge watch a Netflix show, unless one of those 'friends' called me because their lover had left them or something.</p><p>But the only problem was I was late. I was dashing on the road in full speed with a piece of bread hanging from my mouth because my mom wouldn't let me go outside in an empty stomach, my other hand tightly holding on to the strap of my bagpack so it wouldn't fall. </p><p>Yeah, I should stop watching anime if I was going to run around like that. </p><p>My hair tightly put up in a ponytail and the sides of my shirt flying with the wind as I ran. I had worn a blue shirt and a white T-shirt underneath. </p><p>"Byul!!" I screamed putting my arms up on the air when I saw Hunbyul, my date for today standing in front of a coffee shop with her hands crossed over her chest. </p><p>I only ever saw her a few times in the movie club I had joined during my first semester of college, though I hardly ever joined their meetings. I was in second semester now, still a freshman but I still didn't get the hype of this college life. Probably because this Hankuk college was close to my house. </p><p>Byul and I met in the group chat made exclusively for the club members and chatted individually, often. We just happened to casually like and share memes, that was all. </p><p>She had this annoyed look on her face. Was it because I was eight minutes late? </p><p>Oh, right. She broke up with her boyfriend last night. </p><p>"Are you okay Byul?" I said in a softer tone approaching her. She noticed me only then. Her eyes were puffed up, the corners were red and it looked like she was tearing up again.</p><p>
  <i>Gosh, sometimes, I really hated guys.</i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"Soomi..." She unfolded her arms, calling out my name in a shaky little voice. "Look." </p><p>There was a huge brown stain, still fresh and mapped on her white top. </p><p>"How did this happen?" I shrieked. It looked so raw as if someone had just painted it. </p><p>"T-this guy.." </p><p>"I'm so sorry!" A guy with a bundle of tissues on his hands came running out of nowhere. "They said they couldn't give a towel. Oh gosh! I'm sorry!" </p><p>He held his head, frustrated. I could see Byul shifting on her stance uncomfortably because of the ruckus he was making.</p><p>"Did you spill on her dress?" I asked calmly, judging the man who really was losing it in front of me. </p><p>"Yes, I'm so sorry! Are you her friend?" He looked at me for the first time and I too, took a good look at him. </p><p>He had a tall, slender physique. He was masculine but not to the point it would make him intimidating. In fact, there was a gentle aura radiating from him. He looked clueless, and clumsy, and quite good-looking to be fair.</p><p>"I was waiting here with my coffee and suddenly this big crowd came out of the store and I was pushed from the back so I didn't really see. It really was unintentional. I can pay for the top if you want, or your laundry bill—" he kept blabbering on. </p><p>"Namjoon!" Another guy in leather jacket screamed from the back as he approached quickly. </p><p>"What in the hell happened here?" The guy then asked dumbfounded. </p><p>"I spilled coffee on her shirt." The said Namjoon person mumbled and the jacket guy's eyes went wide seeing Byul's shirt.</p><p>"You did it again!" He shouted snatching the tissues from Namjoon's hands. </p><p>"Please forgive him! He's really clumsy." He gave a short bow of apology, and offered the tissues to Byul. As Byul eyed him hesitantly he got up and started wiping her top with the tissues. </p><p>Wiping her top, the stain, that was literally on her breasts. </p><p>I was standing still all this time watching the drama unfold, but I couldn't no more.</p><p>"Hands off!" I slapped his hand away. </p><p>"We're really sorry though. I'm—" he came forward again and I gave a slight push on his shoulder that made him stumble a step backward. </p><p>"Jackson." The Namjoon guy muttered from the back, seemingly getting why I was irritated. </p><p>"What?" Jackson looked back at him, then at us. "W-wait, did you think I was being a pervert? I was only—!" </p><p>"Shut your ass." It was time for me to open my mouth, I mean, really open it. Which brought a swear word of course. These two guys were surely giving me a headache. </p><p>I took off my shirt and gave it to Byul. "Wear it over your top." </p><p>"Wouldn't you be cold?" She denied and tried giving me the shirt back. </p><p>"I'm fine." I said and held her hand from the side. "Shall we go now?" </p><p>Byul nodded and I looked back at the two assholes that were silently watching this all happen. </p><p>"Next time be more careful Namjoon-shi. And Jackson-shi, you should know where you should touch and where not. Plus, I've been watching you staring at my girl's butt." </p><p>The Jackson guy's mouth fell apart and he looked away quickly. "I wasn't!"</p><p>I shrugged and started walking away holding Byul's hand, she was shaking a little. I didn't know if it was because of the breakup or the whole fiasco involving the humongous coffee stain on her expensive top.</p><p>"Wait!" I looked back hearing the taller guy's voice. </p><p>"You're a lesbian?" He asked out of the blue, in a really surprised voice. </p><p>I didn't answer. Instead I looked ahead and put my hand over Byul's back, pulling her a little closer. </p><p>"Let's drink a lot today and forget about that loser okay?" </p><p>By loser, I meant both her boyfriend and those two.</p><p>***</p><p>"Taxi!" I cried putting my hands up and the taxi went away in full speed. It was five hours later, or more or less, I didn't really know because my head hurt and my words slurred even though I was trying my best to sound eloquent. </p><p>In easy terms, I was drunk. Probably, hella drunk.</p><p>"Motherfu—!" I cursed after placing a hand on the side of my spinning head, slightly massaging it.</p><p>I'd sent Byul to her home already. She was so wasted on alcohol she nearly passed out. Not before she cried and ranted all she wanted. </p><p>"That bustard Minhyuk! I won't ever forgive that fucker for breaking up with her!" I muttered swaying a little. My mind was a mess, I wanted to go and kill the piece of shit right now. </p><p>
  <i>How could someone hurt a girl? Girls deserve all the love in this world. If I could just only show an example! if I was a guy I would've never hurt a girl. </i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>The guy from before, didn't he call me lesbian? Was I really gay? </p><p>But I just liked girls. I'd never developed feelings for them, never had feelings for a guy either. </p><p>Was I asexual then? Or aromantic? What was it called?</p><p>
  <i>Was I a plant?</i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>Why was I thinking about my sexuality, and questioning my existence, standing on the side of the street at night when I should be at home now? </p><p>"Taxi!" I run a few steps ahead and almost fell losing my balance, but the taxi didn't stop. </p><p>"Are you okay?" </p><p>"Let me guess." I got up by myself and looked behind. Funny, how it was the same good-looking, and clueless fella from before. It was quite rare seeing a stranger's face twice in two different places of Seoul. </p><p>"Namjoon, right?" I pointed at him, my index finger involuntarily swaying to the sides. </p><p>He looked bewildered at first but then he nodded. "The girl from before! Are you okay?" He came a little closer to see my face clearly. "You seem drunk, should I call a taxi for you?" </p><p>He was alone this time wearing casual shirts and pants. Why did this guy in his twenties dress up like elders? </p><p>"You have nice facial features." I scrunched up my eyebrows observing his face looking up. "U-unique face." </p><p>"I'll call a taxi for you." He backed up, a bit weirded out. </p><p>"Taxi!" He held out one hand seeing a vacant taxi and it stopped. Wow, the world was unfair. I'd been calling them for a while and they wouldn't stop and now that it was a handsome guy with a deep voice they stopped immediately. </p><p>"Go on." He carefully held my arm as I was falling again and pushed me gently towards the car after opening its backdoor. </p><p>"Wait, wait! I screamed, shaking my head to the sides. "Shouldn't I thank you?!" </p><p>"No need to thank-" </p><p>He couldn't finish his sentence as I fully stood up on my feet and went forward. I did the most embarrassing and, the worst thing I ever did in my life.</p><p>At that moment I didn't hesitate a bit though. I crashed my lips onto his cheek; the thing was I aimed for his cheeks— but they landed on the corners of his lips instead. A second later I pulled away. </p><p>"Guess I'm not lesbian then." I whispered to myself staring at his surprised eyes. I went inside the car and closed the door, the driver started away. </p><p>
  <i>He smelled nice, and a little of fries chicken.</i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>After that, well, it was blank. When I woke up later I had never regretted something so much in my life. </p><p>"The class is over! Didn't even realize when the bell rang. It was fun today! Hope to see you all again soon." </p><p>His voice, I had forgotten that I was in the classroom. </p><p>I let my head fall on the table with a loud bang. Though, I looked up right after, he was gone from the class already. </p><p>I got up preparing my mind, my fists turned into balls by my sides. I needed to have a talk with him. With that mindset, I left the class to his office. </p><p>
  <i>Maybe I should just murder him so I wouldn't feel embarrassed or awkward watching him for three weeks.</i>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. She calls me asshole</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>"Come in," I mumbled hearing a knocking sound on the door while I was arranging the books on my table, or— professor Cha's table.</p><p>Though, when I turned on my heels my heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. I stumbled a few steps backward but quickly regained myself and cleared my throat. </p><p>The girl from the other day stepped inside, all the while closing the door slowly behind her. Her eyes showed no emotion, her face was grave, and her mouth sealed tightly. </p><p>
  <i>his just reminded me of some mystery thriller movie I saw a week ago. She exactly had the murderer's expression written on her face.</i>
</p><p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>"Hi." I managed to say under my breath. Why was I getting nervous here?</p><p>"I'm Park Soomi," she said calmly but it somehow managed to send a chill down my spine. </p><p>"I'm Kim Namjoon." I nodded and then held out my hand towards her. "Nice to meet you."</p><p>Why did it just feel like I was trying to reason with a murderer?</p><p>"Or not..." I said slowly taking my hand back to myself. Seemed like she didn't want to shake hands with me. </p><p>
  <i>Great! Another day starting with a failed attempt of handshake. </i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
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</p><p>"The other day I—" </p><p>"I know! It's not your fault!" I screeched before she could finish. I could tell what she was trying to say here and frankly, I always felt uncomfortable with people explaining themselves to me.</p><p>"You do?" Her eyebrow scrunched up as she was still staring into my eyes. </p><p>"Yes, I do!" I said almost aggressively.</p><p>"You were drunk hence you had no clue of what you were doing! You know you shouldn't have drunk and do that to a stranger so you're regretting your decision from that day!"</p><p>There my mouth went blabbering, just like it always did under trepidation.</p><p>"To sum it up—" She raised an eyebrow then slowly let it fall. "Yeah."</p><p>Her facial muscles relaxed, her eyes softened up and she moved her head to the side, avoiding my gaze completely now. </p><p>"I apologize for my behavior the other day. I was drunk, yes, but that does not give me the excuse to kiss someone without their consent. I'm truly sorry." </p><p>She really did look apologetic. She wasn't exactly imploding, but her voice was sincere. Gone was her murderous aura, replacing it with awkwardness, kind of like me.</p><p>I wondered if her stone-cold external appearance was only to cope with her internal nebulous self. Nontheless, I was pretty much blown away seeing her taking responsibility for her action.</p><p>She again looked into my eyes and tipped her head towards me. "I hope you could forgive me, Mr. Kim."</p><p>"Well, yeah, it's okay. I forgot about that already. It's not like it was an agressive kiss of some sort," I recoiled inwardly at my own choice of words, BAD choice of words.</p><p>She gave me an incredulous look, and then quickly averted her gaze again. She scratched on her left cheek and stood silently. Was she expecting me to say more? </p><p>I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle making her look up at me wide eyed. "It's nothing." I quickly shook my head assuring her. </p><p>"The other day..., you said you weren't a lesbian. You know? After doing that to me." </p><p>Oh, wow, why did I blurt that out? It had been bugging me. </p><p>"I..., I did?" She looked confused for a second, but then her expression became morbid again. "I don't think I said that. I do like girls." </p><p>"Oh, so you are a lesbian." </p><p>"No. I mean— Not in that way..., God! I don't know! Why does it matter to you anyway!" A look of pure annoyance marred her expression. </p><p>"I have hardly seen any gay people in South Korea before, I thought it was a taboo here, so..." </p><p>Her expression was getting back to the murderer one again. </p><p>"Oh, I apologise. I'm an lGBT supporter, please don't misunderstand me. I was curious, that's all. I'm sorry if I stepped inside your boundary and made you uncomfortable."</p><p>She scrupulously judged me from head to toe as her eyebrows slowly became furrowed again. "I don't know if I'm gay. Sorry for not being able to answer your question." </p><p>I gave a slight nod to myself, wondering if I should step any further. "I— I'm sorry if I'm being overly comfortable with you, but, if you need help figuring out your sexual orientation, your true self and you're feeling depressed by the fact that you're in a confused state now, maybe I could help you out."</p><p>After a moment of thought, and her silent treatment, I added, "No one else has to know. We could do that, me and you."</p><p>"What?" </p><p>"It will be a secret between us, since we've already gone so far."</p><p>Wait, let's rewind what I just said in my mind. I said I'll help her find it out by doing that? </p><p>Doing what? That sounded like something a pervert teacher of some student-teacher erotica would say. That sounded wrong. Now, I was freaking out.</p><p>"Wait, by that I meant consulting with a friend I have he's a great-" </p><p>I was cut off by a loud sound of the door banging closed. She had left. </p><p>"...Counselor." I finished myself as my right palm involuntarily came up and slalpped my own face hard.</p><p>
  <i>I thought my body was clumsy, when did my mouth become clumsy too? </i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
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</p><p>***</p><p>"It's saxophone tae, not sexy porn star." </p><p>I groaned at Taehyung over the phone as I walked around the convenience store later in the afternoon. </p><p>"Of course, she would dip if you say that. Do you know what—" </p><p>I almost bumped into a person that was coming forward and to my bad luck, the person was no other than her. The Soomi girl from this morning. She was wearing a dark hoodie and the hood was on, only a little part of her face could be seen.</p><p>"You," she mouthed, her eyebrows furrowing again.  </p><p>"I'll talk to you later." Taehyung was shouting nonsensical words from the other side as I cut the call off. </p><p>"I live in this neighbourhood." </p><p>"Oh." </p><p>Did she just scoff at me? </p><p>"Move."</p><p>She ordered and I did so without another word. She took a can of catfood from the shelf that was just beside me. Then she went away. </p><p>"Bye," I mumbled to her retreating back.</p><p>When I came out of the store after paying for the packets of instant food I had bought, it was pouring cats and dogs outside. Even though it was only afternoon it looked like a dark evening with the clowds gathering in the sky, looming over the obelisks of the city far beyond.</p><p>Good thing that I had brought my umbrella while going outside. I had a hunch that it would rain shortly. </p><p>My thoughts were interrupted when I heard a soft voice, a little whimper.</p><p>I looked to the side where it was coming from. A person was crouching down on the floor before the very entrance of the store, their back facing me. A tiny brown cat before them was enjoying food from a can and purring as the person rubbed its head with care. </p><p>It didn't take me a second to figure out that was Soomi. Her hood had fallen off, long black hair cascading down to her shoulders in ringlets.</p><p>"Do you want my umbrella?" I asked abruptly making her turn to me. </p><p>Her face changed as soon as she saw me. She was annoyed again. </p><p>"It's raining hard. I live close by so I'll be fine." I said quickly looking away from her stare. </p><p>She was simple yet unordinary. Her eyes weren't soft, she was almost always scowling whenever I had seen her. She had this permanent grimacing look on her face yet, she was somehow attractive. </p><p>I wouldn't know how to explain it.  </p><p>She got up, wore the hoodie over her head and tucked her hands inside the pockets, then she glimspsed at the pouring rain beyond the shade.</p><p>She then looked at me and her hazel brown eyes rested on mine, as if she was trying to read my mind. </p><p>"You're an asshole." </p><p>Saying that she didn't waste a second. She took a deep breath before she ran off in the rain. </p><p>I was still in a daze. Did she just call me an asshole?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Not him again</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>"Yo, hyung." </p><p>As soon as my brother turned around to meet me I threw the grocery bag at him from a few feet away, giving him barely enough time to catch it. </p><p>"I brought ice cream," I said and left to find a towel. </p><p>"Can't you be more gentle Soomi?" Jimin hissed under his breath. "The bag fucking hit my face!" </p><p>"Mom!" I shouted calling out our mother. "He is cursing again!" </p><p>"Mom is out at her job, idiot" He made a funny face as he sat down on the couch. "Why are you drenched like this? Go get changed before you catch a cold." </p><p>"It's raining outside, asshole!" I shout back at him as I scuff a dry towel on my face after retrieving it from the kitchen.</p><p>"Wow! Isn't asshole your favourite word? Can't you show some manner to your older brother? How many times did I—" </p><p>"You're only a year older than me!"</p><p>"But that means I got to breath, eat and poop a lot more than you. Show some respect!" </p><p>"Why are you here at this time anyway? Respect my ass." I stuck out my bum at his direction, and I could already see his nostrils flairing in the oncoming outburst of anget. As soon as he shot up, the doorbell rung. </p><p>"The lord saved you, now go get the door!" He screamed at me, his eyes almost bulging out of his sockets. </p><p>"As if you could do anything to me. Would've killed you before that." I murmured opening the front door to be met with Jungkook and Taehyung. </p><p>"Great timing. Thanks God you guys are here." I smiled at them and stood aside so they could go in. It had stopped raining outside by then. </p><p>"Let's party, turn up!" Taehyung put his hands up in the air entering, Jungkook rolled his eyes. </p><p>"You always say that but it's not really a cool phrase hyung." He said that to Taehyung and turned to me. "So what are we doing tonight? Playing overwatch?" </p><p>Now it was my time to roll them eyes.</p><p>"Taetae hyung what do you wanna do?" I clung to both of their shoulders as the three of us entered the living room. Jimin waved at them and Jungkook took a seat next to him. I sat beside Jimin's other side and Taehyung sat beside me. </p><p>It wasn't that big of a couch and the four of us barely fit, even while crumpling in our limbs, but ever since we were kids we always sat right here. </p><p>"Why don't we watch moana? Or boss baby? Or-" </p><p>"Zootopia." Jungkook and I completed Taehyung's sentence in unison and laughed together. Taehyung only pouted in reply. </p><p>"How about my suggestion? Let's watch stranger things!" I cheered for myself but, none of them seemed interested. </p><p>"How about overwatch?" Jungkook said cautiously. </p><p>"Stranger things." I deadpanned. </p><p>"Zootopia?" Taehyung said this time. </p><p>"Stranger things," I deadpanned again. </p><p>"Okay okay." Both of them gave up and laid their backs on the couch letting out a sigh in unison. </p><p>"You don't have any suggestion, Jiminie hyung?" I asked Jimin who was sitting next to me, his eyes glued to his phone's screen. </p><p>"You wouldn't listen anyway. Let's watch stranger things." He put down his phone and said. I let out a sound of victory. </p><p>"We can also do what you guys wanted to do later. Thanks god, it's weekend tomorrow!" I laid back in the couch too, again making it harder for the other three as the space had become smaller. Our heads were adjoined when they groaned.</p><p>"What happened to you in class today?" Jungkook suddenly asked. "I've never seen you this much distracted and why did I— no, it looked like you knew the new guy?" </p><p>"You were stalking me Jungkook?" I queried. I could picture him rolling his eyes again. </p><p>"We're taking the same course and I sit behind you. Of course, I'd notice, even if I don't want to," he replied with a distasteful look on his face.</p><p>"Do you really know your new professor?" Jimin asked turning his head towards me. </p><p>"He just looked a bit similar to a kpop idol," I lied blatantly. "Plus, he's not even a professor. Just some random substitute."</p><p>"Or maybe you already like him that's why. Girl's are going nuts because he's young and handsome." Jungkook said and Taehyung laughed. </p><p>"I didn't know you viewed me as a girl, Jeon Jungkook." </p><p>"Nah, I look at you as a massive human potato," he said heaving a small sigh. </p><p>"By the way, how are your classes going Soomi?" Taehyung showed me his box shaped smile asking. "I wish I went to your college!" </p><p>"To see the handsome teacher?" I narrowed my eyes at him. "In all honesty, his face is shaped like an egg."</p><p>"My studies are, I guess they are going well," I added after a moment. "Professor Cha liked my last paper on the tempest, but he said I had to work on my vocabulary and forming my words, and grammar! In the level of creativity, I'm there but I guess I suck at the English language, still.</p><p>I ranted and Taehyung listened to it all with a smile on his face. Jimin and Jungkook were busy talking between themselves.</p><p>"College is indeed giving you a hard time." Taehyung put a hand inside his pocket and pulled something out. "Want some candy?" </p><p>"Don't tell me this is from some girl that likes you, then I'm not taking it." </p><p>"No, I bought this." He laughed and I took the candy bar from his hand. </p><p>"Just you see, I'm gonna get more chocolates than you this valentine." </p><p>"Okay okay." He ruffled my hair giggling to himself. "Oh, Soomi, I just remembered I've been getting help on my English from a friend. He just moved to Seoul a few days ago. Oh, and he lives in this neighborhood too!" </p><p>"You've been getting help to improve your English?" I repeated cocking an eyebrow. </p><p>"Yeah. There's a lot of foreign exchange students in my university, and, I'm bad at speaking English," he said shyly. "Anyway, he's the real deal. Want me to introduce you to him? I'm sure he wouldn't mind." </p><p>"I don't know..., I don't even know this guy." I replied hesitantly. </p><p>"Yeah but since he's my friend he is a friend you too, so, don't worry." He gave me a reassuring smile. "Want to visit his place tomorrow?" </p><p>"Okay... I guess." </p><p>***</p><p>"I can't believe I'm here to learn on a weekday." I groaned letting out a fake cry. "Did you tell your friend about me, hyung?" </p><p>"I did, I think." He made a face as if he couldn't remember. </p><p>"You clumsy ass!" I gave a light slap on his upper arm from the side. </p><p>"The place looks nice from outside though." </p><p>"I guess, but why isn't he opening the door?" I stared at the black front door of the apartment, and it glared at me back.</p><p>"The door is unlocked. He texted me to go inside." Taehyung informed as he read something from his phone. We both trudged inside after we pulled open the door. </p><p>"Looks neat inside too. Less messier than my room." I mumbled as we left our shoes by the doorframe, and walked inside the apartment in our socks. Right after the narrow corridor, there was the living room. Gigantic for one person, but scarcely furnished. "You know hyung, about the professor guy from the other day?"</p><p>"Yeah, what about him?" He sat on a couch on the living room and showed me the place next to him to sit down. </p><p>"I think he's a pervert." </p><p>"Taehyung, why didn't you tell me earlier that you'd come; oh my god! What are YOU doing here!" </p><p>My eyes went wide hearing a loud, familiar voice. When I looked up there was a sleepy mess standing front of me in pajamas. </p><p>Oh no. Not the asshole again!</p><p>---<br/>
A/n: there's been a lot of debate in the past because of Soomi referring to the older guys as 'hyung' instead of oppa. </p><p>There's a reason for that! I'm not butchering up/ disrespecting the Korean language. There's a girl idol called Sejeong and she calls older males hyung too instead of oppa.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. To an understanding</h2></a>
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    <p>"Now, let's try that introduction part in English," Namjoon told Taehyung in his perfect american accent. </p><p>Darn!</p><p>He was good— scratch that, he was amazing and eloquent at speaking English. Every word he articulated made my gaping mouth go wider, and wider. He sounded like a native speaker. </p><p>"Hello, I am Kim Taehyung," Taehyung commenced in English.  </p><p>"How are you Taehyung?" Namjoon asked to keep the conversation going. </p><p>"I'm god!" A bright smile made its way to Taehyung's face. </p><p>I couldn't help but let out a silent chuckle. Taehyung was always the adorable one in our friend group. </p><p>"You mean you are the almighty? The god?" Namjoon asked with a serious face on but I could tell he was just being patient with Taehyung.</p><p>"Yes... No!" Taehyung shook his head to the sides.</p><p>"Good?" Namjoon finished Taehyung's sentence, and Taehyung nodded vigorously. </p><p>"Yes! I'm good!''</p><p>"You can also say that you are fine." Namjoon showed him a small smile and then turned to me. His lips were pressed into a flat line as he nodded at me. "Did you go over the vocabulary sheet?" </p><p>"Almost." I answered shortly and tried concentrating on the jumbled up papers before me.</p><p>Because Namjoon didn't react too fervently when he saw me today and I too was hiding my reaction carefully, Taehyung couldn't guess anything had happened between us, or, that we knew each other from before. </p><p>"God, why is this so hard!" Taehyung whined from my side and when I faced him, he had already let himself fall flat on the floor. </p><p>"I'm sorry you have to sit on the floor, my house is a mess right now. I only moved here three days ago," Namjoon said in a sincere manner. </p><p>He had this nerdy, round glasses on his face that made him look like a child somehow. </p><p>Why did he have to look like that? I wanted to scowl at him as response but couldn't. </p><p>"It's okay. Japanese style, I like it." </p><p>I handed him the sheets and we both recoiled hearing a low sound of snoring. It was coming from Taehyung who was lying on the floor beside me. </p><p>"Did he actually fall asleep?" Namjoon asked surprised.</p><p>I didn't say anything, instead, I poked Taehyung with my mechanical pencil but he didn't move at all. A second later, he turned to the other side and the sound of his snoring got louder. </p><p>"Guess he has worked hard enough for today." Namjoon chuckled a little, starting to survey the marks I had made on the sheets that indicated just how many of those words were known to me. There weren't many.</p><p>Then the awkward silence begun. I cursed at Taehyung inwardly for falling asleep like that, leaving me with Namjoon unsupervised.</p><p>"You're pretty good!" Namjoon's voice snapped me back from my thoughts and I saw him smiling brightly by himself. What a liar. "I can give you a book that will help you learn a few handy words. I will email you a few materials too."</p><p>I nodded and took the sheets back from him.</p><p>"Um, Park Soomi-sshi," Namjoon then cleared his throat making me look at him again. </p><p>"Call me Soomi. I'm your student." </p><p>"Yes, Soomi." He looked puzzled as he fixed his glasses. "The other day, I think you might've misunderstood me. By doing that I meant consulting with a therapist friend I have. He has helped a lot of questioning teens—" </p><p>"I'm not a teen. I turned twenty last month." I told him, my eyebrows scrunching up as a force of habit. He nodded. </p><p>"Yes. But he's good either way. I had to come clean because it's been bugging me a lot. I mean, the misunderstanding I had with you. I couldn't sleep last night and I'm glad I could meet you today and tell you." </p><p>I stayed silent. He heaved a small sigh, staring at my eyes this time. "I'm twenty five. We don't have much of an age difference between us."</p><p>"What!" I was shocked. "How are you a teacher then?" </p><p>"I graduated early." He scratched the back of his head sheepishly, shifting in his position. </p><p>"I skipped two grades too when I was young. I'm not a full fledged teacher yet. I got my master's degree a year ago and moved back to my hometown. Your professor, Mr. Cha, was a guest teacher in our university. He was quite fond of me, and I helped him with his thesis. That's why, he recommended me here and I got back to Seoul. The experience I gain here will help me get a fund for my research later," he elaborated and I took some time grasping it all. </p><p>"Man, you look like you're in your thirties or even forties." I blurted out. </p><p>That was a lie. </p><p>"I look old. Yeah." He bobbed his head up and down slowly. </p><p>"I'm saying, most of the time. But wow, you're so cool! Like, you're such an intelligent person! I would've never believed someone could become a university teacher at such a young age. You even skipped grades!" I couldn't help but awe over him, since, he was truly amazing. </p><p>"Oh. Thank you." He said, looking down at the scattered pages in front of him, his hand caressing his forehead. I couldn't see his facial expression. </p><p>"About your sexuality, I thought about it." He looked up at me after a while. "This is just a suggestion, I'm not putting any pressure on you. So I thought, that, maybe, if you liked someone you could try dating them to find out." </p><p>"A guy or a girl?" I raised an eyebrow. "Who do I date?"</p><p>"You're talking like a bisexual." He let out a sudden chuckle. "You haven't dated anyone before?" </p><p>"No." I shrugged with my shoulders. "I'm twenty already and I don't think I've ever felt anything for a guy or girl, physically or emotionally. I just can't seem to get invested. Sometimes when I get too into a fictional character, I think to myself, wow, if they were here maybe I could work some feelings out. But in real life? Nah, man. Sometimes I think I'm asexual. You know, those who don't feel any sexual attraction; I've done some internet research on it. Yet I'm confused."</p><p>"You seem like you're quite curious about those feelings, apart from being confused." </p><p>His deep voice resonated around the space, and I realized that he was maybe good at analyzing people. </p><p>"Actually, I think it would be nice to feel that way towards someone. Like your heart would flutter, you would smile uncontrollably whenever you think about them. Your heartbeat would go faster and you'd have butterflies flying around your stomach. </p><p>"Or feel that sexual attraction, that works too. The sudden jolts with each touch, electricity in the air. Your breath gets caught, the air inside your lungs getting knocked out by someone. </p><p>Since I can't or haven't felt them for my entire life I feel somehow, inhuman. Or maybe it's because I've read too many books or watched too many movies." </p><p>I realized that I was blabbering so I ended my rant in a rush. I felt embarrassed as hell. </p><p>However, he was smiling. The sincere type of smile, that of an age-old pilgrim. </p><p>"What?" I voiced out loudly, feeling my face heating up. </p><p>"Nothing." Namjoon said, still smiling. "As I was saying, maybe you could date someone you'd possibly like in the future. For someone, those feelings could come slowly. And it's totally okay too being an asexual, and aromantic— the ones that can't harbour romantic feelings either. Platonic feelings are just as equally great, you know. They just aren't much talked about." </p><p>I was quite baffled that he knew about those terms. Once I jokingly had uttered those very words before Jimin and he demanded an explanation under utter confusion. When I did explain, he said those were internet made up words. </p><p>Those felt very real to me. Because I too, could be one of them. Asexual and, or, aromantic. </p><p>"Hm. Okay." I said, thinking hard to myself. Just then a sudden sound of snoring made us both startle. </p><p>"Let's introduce each other again. This time properly." Namjoon said after Taehyung's snoring subsided a little. </p><p>"I am Kim Namjoon. It's nice to meet you." He held out his hand towards me. </p><p>I just realized he had really deep dimples. For a second I got lost somewhere watching them. </p><p>"I'm Park Soomi and, likewise." I said and looked away not bothering to shake hands with him. </p><p>I wasn't annoyed or anything. I just felt embarrassed for staring at his dimples for such long seconds. </p><p>Namjoon looked at his hand that was held out to me and then looked at my face again. He awkwardly slapped his palm with his other hand and took it back. </p><p>"You can always come to me for help. Since you're my student, I'd be glad to assist. Please, call me Namjoon. Mr. Kim sounds way too formal." </p><p>I nodded and he nodded too, awkwardly. </p><p>"Okay so for your grammar problems I can suggest you a book too. There, you can find it in that pile— okay, no, I'll get it for you." He mumbled by himself and tried to get up. </p><p>But, he fell on his back halfway and the books around him scattered further away. Before I knew it he had fallen flat on the floor. </p><p>"Ouch, fuck!" He cursed, wincing in pain. </p><p>"Wow, are you okay?" I got up and looked down at him, holding out my hand to get him up. </p><p>"What happened?" Taehyung said in his groggy morning voice as he sat up from his spot. </p><p>"I fell." Namjoon didn't hold my hand and got up by himself. "Thank you Soomi— ow, ouch!" He held a side of his head letting out soft groans. His nerdy-looking glasses were hanging from one of his ears, giving him this funny look. </p><p>"Destruction god." Taehyung murmured rubbing his sleepy eyes and I couldn't help but laugh. </p><p>
  <i>Namjoon was, quite cute. I guess.</i>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Old partner</h2></a>
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  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
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</p><p>"You're there?"</p><p>I almost fell on my back, hearing the sudden voice as soon as I had entered the office, but, thankfully, it was only Yoongi. </p><p>"How did you get inside?" I gasped fixing my glasses as he came inside and comfortably took a seat on the chair in front of my desk. </p><p>"Your clumsy ass forgot to lock the door, again." </p><p>"Oh." I checked the door to make sure of his statement. "You're right." </p><p>"Hmph." He crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm only here to see you. Can't believe you became a professor!" </p><p>"Correction, I'm only here on someone's behalf and take your legs off the table! This is not mine!" </p><p>I pushed off his skeletal legs, clothed under baggy jeans from professor Cha's table. Taking a seat on the opposite direction, I took a closer look at him. </p><p>"What's with the mint colored hair? I swear I saw it blue two days ago." </p><p>"Why? You don't like it?" He shook his head making his colored hair dance in the air. </p><p>"No, it even goes with your name. Maybe I'll call you Mint Yoongi from now on." </p><p>However, Yoongi's face was blank since he surely didn't like the joke. "Shut up before I shove your literature up your ass." </p><p>"Alright. Mind your language," I chided, even though, I knew he never would. </p><p>"Don't boss me around. I'm on my final year." He crossed his arms over his chest and lazily rested his back against the chair, almost as if he was preparing to go to sleep. </p><p>"Wanna eat lunch together at the cafeteria?" He then suddenly said with his eyes still closed. </p><p>"Yeah. Let me just finish reporting to professor." I quickly pulled out my laptop from the drawer underneath the desk, and started working the email I was going to send professor Cha about today's class. </p><p>"You still rap underground?" I asked Yoongi, albeit I wasn't sure if he was actually awake there. </p><p>"Wanna go this week? Like our old times?" He said in his raspy voice. </p><p>I bit the inside of my cheeks, my fingers resting over the keyboard. "I'd like to but now I'm—" </p><p>"What? Because now you're in the education system? I'm a student too. So what, you're a teacher?" </p><p>"I know. It's complicated. I'm liking this profession but I miss being before the crowd too." </p><p>It stayed silent for a while, until, Yoongi spoke again. </p><p>"So what are you going to do after you're done here? The professor comes back in three weeks right?" </p><p>Yoongi was in the music department here but it seemed like he had knowledge about other departments too. </p><p>"I don't know. I'd probably go back to Ilsan and start working on my thesis. Already sent the subject to Philadelphia university in America and they seemed to be interested." </p><p>"Whatever you want dude, but what's with your dress code these days? My god, why are you grinning to yourself like a sicko!" </p><p>I looked up and saw him staring at me wide-eyed. "Where?" I shut down the laptop with a thud, hoping it wouldn't break again. </p><p>"I saw you! Were you watching porn in there? What the fuck!" </p><p>"How can I watch porn in five minutes!" I threw my arms up in the air, frustrated. "Let's go and eat now. I'm done with my report." </p><p>"Now that I think about it, I've seen you grinning by yourself since I got here. What's wrong with you?" </p><p>"I wasn't." </p><p>Truthfully, my cheek muscles were hurting for grinning too much.</p><p>It had been going on for two days now. Since she had praised me highly the other day I couldn't stop smiling like a fool. This made me realize how much I really liked being a teacher. </p><p>I shook my head trying to get rid of the thoughts as we entered the cafeteria.</p><p>"The food is shit most of the days, but damn, did the lunchlady give you more food because you're a teacher!" </p><p>"She gave you more than an average student because you're handsome," I said taking a seat on an empty six chaired table and he sat at my opposite direction. </p><p>"Don't joke. Are you comfortable eating here? The teachers have their own lounge and all." </p><p>"It's okay, I feel more at ease here." I gave him a smile and we both started eating. The conversation started from bits and pieces, and flowed from that, reminding me of my own student days. </p><p>"Hey. What's that?" Suddenly Yoongi said out of context, staring somewhere behind me. </p><p>I turned my head around and focused on another table close by. There was a girl wearing big spectacles sitting there with three other boys. She was looking down on her food with two of the boys sitting by her sides, the other facing her. </p><p>"What does it look like?" I asked Yoongi after turning to him. </p><p>"I don't know... Bullying?" He kept chewing on his food but we both stayed quiet this time. Our ears perked up to hear what they were saying. </p><p>"Why don't you help us? You're the one with the brain in our group!" A male voice said through his teeth, the voice sharp and gritted. </p><p>"Yeah, But it's a group project and— And Mrs Yoon said she'll fail us this time if she catches anyone cheating. It's the last date tomorrow but you guys still haven't sent me your parts. W-we divided the work right?" The girl's voice was trembling as she spoke. </p><p>"Are you serious?" A male voice laughed historically. </p><p>"For fucks sake Hyemi how could you even wait for us. Couldn't you do that on your own?" </p><p>"B-but it's a group project. I thought you guys would—" The girl tried to defend herself. </p><p>"So what? Don't tell me you've done nothing!" </p><p>"I.. I finished my parts." </p><p>"You fucking selfish whore!" A male voice shouted. "It's the last date tomorrow and now you're saying that to us?" </p><p>"I've reminded you a million times..." </p><p>The bickering went on. Yoongi and I shared a glance. It was definitely not a normal conversation and we just couldn't sit there and listen anymore. </p><p>We both stood up and I thought of calmly asking them what's wrong. </p><p>Before that could happen, I saw someone approaching them with a glass of water. Within seconds, that person emptied the glass by pouring all the water over the boy's head who was sitting facing the girl. </p><p>And the person with the glass was no other than Park Soomi. </p><p>"Hope this calmed your head," she said in an icy cold voice. Everyone in the cafeteria frozen to their places, watching her with their jaws dropped on the floor. </p><p>The boy just looked at his drench self, shocked for a second, then got up. "What the hell!" </p><p>"I saw what you were doing to her," Soomi said sternly.</p><p>"What did we do?" </p><p>"Are you her friend?"</p><p>The other two boys got up too. </p><p>"No I'm not. But I saw it," Soomi said. Her intense stair wouldn't waver from the boy before her. </p><p>"Then why don't you mind your own business!" The guy drenched in water snapped, pushing Soomi on the shoulder making her stumble a few steps backward. </p><p>She regained herself in a second. She looked at her shoulder and then looked at the guy before her. A smirk slowly made its way on her face and I didn't know why a chill ran down my spine. </p><p>"You just didn't do that," she said to the guy and before another warning, she grabbed his hand which was still up in the air. </p><p>She twisted it, she wasn't even moving an inch from her place. But the guy's face lost its color and he was soon shouting in pain. </p><p>When she let go off his arm, he fell on the floor wincing in pain, holding his limp hand with his other. The other two boys quickly approached her but she dodged and quickly lunged to the space behind them.</p><p>Then I saw her pulling on their hair and them both screaming, like there's no tomorrow. </p><p>I was frozen seeing all this. Suddenly I snapped back to reality and I ran to them. "Stop fighting!" I yelled, trying to pull Soomi away from those two boys. There were other cafeteria workers who jumped in too but she wouldn't let go. </p><p>She kept uttering violent words at them nonstop. It took some time for everyone to pull her apart from the duo, holding her from the sides. </p><p>"Okay, let's go back to eat," I shouted since everyone was still staring. And here I thought, university was less drama than high school. My one sure was, but it was also boring.</p><p>
  <i>Because there was no her in my university. </i>
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</p><p>What if she hurt herself, I couldn't help but wonder. Maybe I could go and check on her later. </p><p>"Damn, who is she?" </p><p>I didn't realize when Yoongi had stood next to me. His eyes locked to the emply sight where they just went away with Soomi. </p><p>"Why?" I asked, bemused. </p><p>"She is lowkey my type."</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. She's into her</h2></a>
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  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
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</p><p>It hurt. </p><p>I hadn't realized it at first, but one of those weak guys actually had the guts to throw an off-key punch to my face which only begun to hurt the day after.</p><p>Jimin wasn't at home, thankfully, since he would've made a ruckus if he knew I had a fight with some people. I mean, I'm not a kindergarten kid anymore. </p><p>It was their fault to begin with.</p><p>"Hey." </p><p>A voice snapped me back to reality as I'd almost bumped head-first with someone in the campus. After looking up, it was Kim Namjoon. </p><p>"Hello," he crooned, tilting his head. I was still in a reverie, thinking to myself. </p><p>"What?" </p><p>"What, what?" </p><p>"You don't have a class scheduled today, so what?" I snapped as I clearly didn't have enough energy to amuse the guy. </p><p>"Because I saw that you hurt your face the other day." He had a can of coke in his hands and he held it towards me. </p><p>"I didn't." </p><p>"You did. You're hiding it with your hair." </p><p>I quickly rearranged my bangs. There was indeed a bump on the side of my face and it had turned pale-blue yesterday. Jimin had gone to a trip with Taehyung, and Jungkook joined them too, so nobody noticed it. I restrained from going to the trip because unlike them, I wanted to focus on my studies. </p><p>"What do I do with the coke? I'm not thirsty." I furrowed my eyebrows asking him. </p><p>"Put it where it hurts. The can is cold. I couldn't find ice." </p><p>I almost rolled my eyes, taking the can from his hand. "You didn't have to, but thanks." </p><p>He pulled a spray medicine out of his pocket suddenly. "You can use this later too." </p><p>He had a small smile on his face and for some reasons I felt a little annoyed. "I'll buy my own medicine, why do you care?" </p><p>"Because you're my student?" He cocked an eyebrow at me. "Yesterday when you were fighting them I immediately knew you'd hurt yourself." </p><p>
  <i>Embarrassing. </i>
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</p><p>I forgot he was there too.</p><p>"Maybe you can visit a doctor if it's bad." </p><p>"No, I don't, it isn't that bad. Did you come all this way to tell me that?"</p><p>"Yeah, pretty much." He shoved his hands inside his pockets making a face like he was trying to remember something.</p><p>"Oh, I have this friend, his name is Yoongi and he was there with me. When you know, you were fighting those guys in the cafeteria." He threw in some punches in the air and I had the urge to roll my eyes again. </p><p>"Yeah, so he thought it was funny too?"</p><p>"No, why would he?" Namjoon frowned. "It was actually something opposite, I was surprised. He said-"</p><p>"Unnie!" A sudden scream made both of us turn our heads towards the sound. A girl, standing a few feet away was huffing, bending her upper body and holding onto her kneecaps. </p><p>"Soomi unnie, is that you?" She straightened up and said. I cringed at the word 'unnie' like I always did. "Oh, you were talking? Go on!" She shouted again from afar, looking at our faces dumbfounded. </p><p>"You know her?" Namjoon asked me. </p><p>"No. But it looks like she was looking for me. Bye then." I left without hearing another word from him. </p><p>"Take care of yourself! Visit a doctor!" He screamed from the back, as I ran towards the girl. </p><p>Man, he's embarrassing. Just like a dad! </p><p>"Hi?" I awkwardly said, slowing down my pace after approaching her.</p><p>"I'm really sorry if I interrupted your conversation," she said, fixing her big glasses and tugging in a tendril of her unruly hair behind her ear.</p><p>"No. It's okay! And you are...?" </p><p>"Oh, you don't remember me. I'm Jung Hyemi. The other day in the cafeteria-"</p><p>"Oh, so you saw it, and you're here to mock?" I crossed my arms over my chest. </p><p>Since this morning, I'd been noticing people whispering and pointing at me in the campus. Maybe someone shoot a video and posted it on the university website. Who knew?  </p><p>"No. I'm the girl you saved the other day." She fixed her glasses again and without another notice she made a ninety degrees bow.</p><p>"You're my hero! Please accept my thank you gift!" </p><p>"What thank you gift?" This time, I was the one dumbfounded. </p><p>"Could we perhaps, go somewhere else?" </p><p>She shyly asked and I had to raise one eyebrow. </p><p>***</p><p>"Wow it looks delicious but I don't know if I should accept this. It's your blood, sweat and tears and all!" </p><p>I awed over the lunchbox she had given me. It was filled with fruits, vegetables, eggs, and meat,. Everything looked extravagant in shapes and sizes. </p><p>She giggled clasping her mouth with her hands. "You're making this a big deal unnie." </p><p> </p><p>"I can't cook shit so it is a big deal for me. And, please, don't call me unnie," I said. </p><p>"Why?" She asked, her expression becoming serious in the process.</p><p>"I don't know, that word makes me uncomfortable. Maybe because, I've been boyish my whole life, I'm not used to feminine terms for myself. You can call me by my name." </p><p>"No, how can I do that! You're a senior. Is sunbae* okay?"</p><p>She probably was in her first semester, and probably did enough research on me to know I was a senior only by a semester. </p><p>"Yeah, I guess." I scrunched up my eyebrows, thinking to myself. "Or just call me Soomi, I really wouldn't mind."</p><p>"Can I make lunchboxes for you some times? I mean, I'm a food and nutrition major, and I like cooking for people." She suddenly got excited by herself. </p><p>"What?" I choked, seeing her sudden outburst of excitement. </p><p>"Please?" She imploded with her eyes. I couldn't help but wonder why she was getting so attached. </p><p>"No, I don't want you to overwork yourself. Since you're thankful, I'll consider this lunchbox and eat everything but no more. This is enough." </p><p>She pouted a little looking ahead. "I don't even make lunchboxes for my own brother but I had to for you. You know, you were really cool yesterday. Those people have always been bothering me but no one ever stood up before, you were the first." </p><p>"If they ever disturb you again, tell me. I'm gonna slap those motherfuckers real hard." </p><p>"You're funny." She let out a soft giggle. "I'm really thankful for what you did. C—can we be friends? I mean, I don't have any friends. It's really hard for me to approach people but it was different for you. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I found out your name today, and I wasn't afraid to ask people around. Though, I get anxious just by talking to strangers other times."</p><p> </p><p>I was shell-shocked, and silent for a second. It was a lot to take in. </p><p>"Um, thank you Hyemi. But I'm not your hero, you are your own hero. You took care of everything by yourself today and talked to strangers even though it's hard for you. I wasn't there you know. So you should be proud of yourself." </p><p>She was looking down on her bony hands that were planted on her lap, and she nodded after a moment.  </p><p>"S-so my brother would worry if I go home late. Please eat everything in the lunchbox and tell me if you liked it." </p><p>"Okay!" I held onto her lunchbox, a smile towards her. "Be careful on your way back home." </p><p>"Yeah." She got up but stood there for a second holding onto her bag. </p><p>"I changed my mind. You said people call you oppa right. Then, can I too?" </p><p>I nodded in the affirmative. I never really minded masculine terms. Those felt home to me. </p><p>---<br/>
A/n: sunbae means senior if anyone doesn't know. </p><p>And no I'm not a koreaboo, I just feel it's more natural to use some words in romanized korean. Example: oppa and big brother wouldn't sound the same, I've tried it before in my other fics.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. He's into her</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <i>Knock knock</i>
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</p><p>Wrong. I wasn't actually knocking on the door, I was banging on it. Still he wasn't openning up. </p><p>It was 12 minutes later, when the door creaked open and a pair of eyes could be seen. Then, he fully opened the door. </p><p>Namjoon was wearing loose pajamas bottoms, and flipflops that had ryan drawn on them, and a boring looking sweatshirt on top with sleeves that were too long for him. His hair was an utter mess. A toothbash was hanging from his mouth. </p><p>"Were you sleeping with that toothbrush in your mouth?" I asked feeling a little disgusted. If it was true that would mean he was eating his toothpaste. Ew. </p><p>"No! I was in the toilet and— wait, what are you doing here? It's 7 in the morning!" He mumbled, moving aside. "Come in. I thought Taehyung went on a trip. He didn't tell me you'd come." </p><p>"I didn't go to that trip. Of course, I'd come here." I made my way inside, and sat comfortably on the couch as if this was my own home. </p><p>After he was done, he came back with his hair fixed, and wearing a decent shirt this time but the same pajamas. His eyes were so puffy, it looked like he was still sleeping. </p><p>"I faced some issues solving the grammartical problems you told me to work on last day," I said opening my bagpack. He plopped down in front of me while rubbing his eyes. </p><p>"Also, I need to know what you were trying to say the other day?" I asked him carefully. He looked at me then looked at my homework placed in front of him. </p><p>"What was I trying to say?" He asked back, letting out a big yawn. </p><p>"You know, your friend? The one that saw me in the cafeteria? And he said something?" </p><p>I should've listened to him back then, because later when I recalled our unfinished conversation, it started making my head ache with curiosity. </p><p>"Really?" He yawned again as he started to check my notebook before him. </p><p>"Oh," he suddenly said, "My friend, his name is Yoongi. </p><p>I think he likes you." </p><p>Inside my head, everything went silent for a second, only the screeching sound of his pen running on the dry paper could be heard. </p><p>"What?" I shouted. Could it be that I had heard him wrong? </p><p>Namjoon jerked his head backwards, bracing the impact of my scream. "Well the other day, he said that you were lowkey his type, and he had this look on his face. I've never seen him interested in any girl before." </p><p>"Wow." I murmured. "I've never had a guy liking me before." </p><p>"Why? I think many guys would like you." He said out of blue and he didn't look as sleepy as before. </p><p>"Someone is knocking on the door for a while," I said, and he straightened up in his seat. </p><p>Someone was actually knocking on the door. </p><p>"I'll go get it." He got up. </p><p>As he left the room, I touched my cheeks. They were burning for an unknown reason. </p><p>Thoughts of some guy liking me had never crossed my mind. The only guys I'd ever mixed in my life were my brother Jimin, and his friends Taehyung, and Jungkook. All my life, I had only befriended girls because I only ever went to all girls schools.</p><p>"This is Yoongi." Namjoon's voice snapped me back from my thoughts. When I looked bsck, there was a mint haired, and short guy standing beside him. </p><p>"That's Park Soomi, my student." Namjoon told the mint guy but he didn't seem much interested as he came and sat beside me on the floor. </p><p>"That's your friend?" I asked Namjoon and he nodded. </p><p>"I know you." The Yoongi guy's raspy voice made me turn to him. </p><p>"You were the girl fighting in the cafeteria the other day," he said in his ever so lackluster voice, his face impassive. </p><p>"Yeah." I slowly nodded. "Nice to meet you." </p><p>"Likewise," he replied, still staring at me. </p><p>So this guy was the one who liked me? I really don't think so. </p><p>He was good-looking, albeit. He was shorter than Namjoon, and thinner too, but his limbs were slender, mannequin-like. His hair color, for some reasons, I liked a lot. The mint color suited his unusually pale skin tone. </p><p>Even though, I was looking down on my notes, I could still feel him staring at me. What a weird guy.</p><p>"What are you here for?" Namjoon asked him. </p><p>"I told you I'd come and visit your place someday," Yoongi answered in a low voice.</p><p>"That doesn't mean you can come by randomly. Soomi, your phone's been showing notifications for a while. You can reply to your texts." </p><p>There were a lot of texts coming from Hyemi. We had exchanged numbers the other day, and she'd been texting me since.  </p><p>When I opened the chat box, it showed a selfie of her face, messed up with chocolate and flour. Her texts said she was practicing making some fancy cakes for Valentine's day. </p><p>She looked extremely cute. I texted her that too, paired with a bunch of heart emojis of different colors that eventually made up a rainbow.</p><p>"Valentine's day is coming soon, right?" I blurted out, making them both turn their heads to me. </p><p>"Yeah," Namjoon said, dumbfounded. </p><p>"Looks like someone's getting the p." Yoongi retorted staring at my handphone and it took me a while to understand what he was saying. </p><p>"What?" I snapped. </p><p>"You don't know what that means? I think Namjoon knows the best." Yoongi turned his head towards Namjoon. </p><p>"Take it off now, take it off~" Yoongi started to sing in a low voice making Namjoon scream aloud. </p><p>"Shut up Yoongi!" He threw a piece of paper at Yoongi's face. "You promised you wouldn't talk about expensive girl!" </p><p>"Expensive girl?" I asked and Namjoon yelled again, his face unusually red. </p><p>"You don't need to know about that!" </p><p>"Okay, okay. Calm down." I clicked my tongue in annoyance at Yoongi. "Also, dude what? Why were you checking my texts?"</p><p>"From where I was sitting I could see everything going on in your phone. Nice girlfriend you have." </p><p>"You think I'm a lesbian too?" I narrowed my eyes at him. However, he turned to  Namjoon. </p><p>"I'm going to take a tour in your house." He told Namjoon, got up, and disappeared inside. </p><p>"Sorry for his behaviour," Namjoon said after a while. I was sitting straight, feeling a little surprised, to be honest. </p><p>"I thought you said he liked me?" </p><p>"Well.." Namjoon scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "He said you were 'lowkey' his type, he didn't say 'highkey'." </p><p>"What the fuck does that mean?" I crossed my arms over my chest, somewhat irritated.</p><p>"Language Soomi!" </p><p>"Language, my ass." </p><p>Namjoon sighed giving me a look like I was some kind of problematic child. </p><p>"Maybe he does like you that's why he's acting like that? Like in pride and prejudice Mr. Darcy seemed like an asshole but at the end he liked her after all." </p><p>"That's just fiction. I told you, guys don't like me." I breathed out and shook my head to the sides helplessly. </p><p>"Yeah, but fiction wouldn't be enjoyable if it wasn't relatable." </p><p>"I heard everything." Yoongi said from the back making us both startle like it was some ghost.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. What Yoongi actually said</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Yoongi was standing by the door with a morbid look on his face. As he took a seat beside me, his muscles relaxed and his face became nonchalant again. </p><p>"You're wrong," he told Namjoon and then turned to me. </p><p>"I don't like you that way." </p><p>He was staring right into my eyes and those eyes of his weren't saying anything. I blinked fast, looking away to break off our staring competition but I couldn't say a word.</p><p>"But you said she was your type!" Namjoon sounded frustrated as he yelled aloud. </p><p>"Did I?" Yoongi shrugged. "I thought I'd said, 'she's low-key my kind.' Have I ever said that to anyone before?" </p><p>"Y-you did?" Namjoon looked like he was struck by an asteroid. </p><p>"That means I'm not interested in being friends with anyone. She's the first person I thought would be cool to be friends with, when I first saw her in the cafeteria." </p><p>Yoongi again turned to me and looked into my wide eyes. "I think you misinterpreted what I said. No, he did that." He pointed to Namjoon. </p><p>"And why would I like you? Aren't you a lesbian?" He added. </p><p>"What makes you think I'm a lesbian?" </p><p>Namjoon was trying to say something but I stopped him by throwing a question at Yoongi. </p><p>"Everything?" Yoongi cocked an eyebrow. "At first look you would seem like a normal tomboy but by observing closer you're definitely a lesbian." </p><p>"Elaborate," I demanded with sheer curiosity. Now I was actually eager to know why he thought that. </p><p>"The other day you saved that girl out of nowhere and in such a heroic way, it almost looked like you were trying to impress the girl." </p><p>"So?" </p><p>Did I actually look like that?</p><p>"And today I saw you sending the entire pride flag, a rainbow heart to a girl. It wouldn't be right to assume she's your girlfriend, she could be a friend. It wouldn't have been right to assume you're a lesbian too but, you don't seem like you are interested in guys. What are you doing in his place early in the morning?" </p><p>"I'm only her teacher," Namjoon murmured. </p><p>"I'm talking here Namjoon." Yoongi gave him a glare. "So what I was saying, even judging by your outfit, if only your hair was cut short, I'd think you are a pretty guy. Girls your age at least uses some lip tint but you seem like you've never used makeup in your life. It's like the classic lesbian we have in TV showes. You have that aura, I feel it radiating from you. That you want to impress girls." </p><p>I waited awhile to see if he would say more, but he was silent so I spoke up, "Are you done?" </p><p>"Yeah. I'm tired talking too much." Yoongi made a face like he was annoyed.</p><p>"I've never seen him talk this much!" Namjoon said in a puzzled tone. </p><p>"I'm asexual." I said out of blue making them both look at me. "I think I am. So you are wrong!" </p><p>"Asexual?" Yoongi questioned back, furrowing his eyebrows. </p><p>"I clearly haven't gotten any kind of feelings for anyone before. It's true that I like girls and maybe, I wish I could like them that way. I haven't befriended many guys. My brother is only a year older and my mom brought us both up the same way. Probably, that's why I'm boyish." </p><p>"I'm sorry for assuming then," Yoongi uttered in a low voice. Even though his facial expression remained the same, his gravelly voice sounded strong and sincere. "I shouldn't have. People often assume I'm gay, and they're right. I honestly thought I found another friend like me here." </p><p>"You're gay?" Namjoon's voice was soft in a gasp. I was taken aback too and then I thought, it somehow made sense. Yoongi was gay. </p><p>The mint boy fingered the silver chain that dangled from his slender neck, down to his baggy black t-shirt that said 'fxxk off', and for the first time, he gave an expression that lasted longer on his face.</p><p>He gave a knowing look at Namjoon. "We should've both figured out back at 8th grade, when I told you my life-long crush was Seo Taji, not way later in college." </p><p>Namjoon heaved a small sigh, a smile slowly making its way to the corner of his lips. "I guess so. Congratulations Yoongi. I am quite dense, not to be able to realize it sooner." </p><p>"I just didn't show anyone I was stigmatized. That's why you didn't realize. Not your fault," Yoongi said back.</p><p>It was a nice moment between the two friends but then, my mouth did what it always did the best, which was blurring shit out. "At least one of us figured it out." </p><p>I thought, I saw Yoongi smile, almost.</p><p>"It's not cool to eavesdrop Yoongi," Namjoon added, after a few seconds passed by.</p><p>"What do you expect? Your house isn't soundproof, and your voice is extra loud on top," Yoongi deadpanned, looking the least apologetic. </p><p>Then he looked at me. "Maybe date the girl to find out if you're really a asexual or a lesbian, you do seem to like her." </p><p>"Which girl?" I raised an eyebrow. </p><p>"The girl you were texting." </p><p>"She's just a friend," I said, annoyed again. </p><p>"Then date him." Yoongi pointed to Namjoon with his eyes. </p><p>"What? Why?" We both shouted in unison.</p><p>"Why? You two look like you're in good terms," Yoongi jeered, the mocking tone never leaving his snarly voice. "I'm obviously joking."</p><p>"You're weird." I gave him a sharp look.</p><p>"Yeah, shut up," Namjoon chimed in.</p><p>Yoongi shrugged with his shoulder. "So are we good now?" He told me. </p><p>"You mean friends? Yeah." I showed him a fist, and he bumped his with mine. His skeletal ring almost leaving an imprint on my skin.</p><p>"Do you wanna go and drink this evening? To celebrate our newfound friendship?" I gestured throwing an imaginary glass in the air. </p><p>"Sur—" </p><p>"No!" Namjoon shouted before Yoongi could finish. "Don't you have anything else to do Soomi? Go home." </p><p>Wow. Why was he being such a killjoy all of a sudden. </p><p>"I'm bored. No one's at home and I don't wanna spend another boring evening all by myself." </p><p>"Why are you protesting?" Yoongi asked, giving a judging look at Namjoon. </p><p>"Because you don't know what kind of stuff she can do when she's drunk!" Namjoon yelled making heat rush to my face immediately. </p><p>That's why, he was against the idea. </p><p>"What?" Yoongi looked at my face for an answer, then looked at Namjoon again. </p><p>"Nothing!" We both screamed making him flinch for the loudness. </p><p>***</p><p>"Ah! I can't do this anymore." Yoongi let his head fall on the table with a loud bang. "Soomi, I lose. You win. I just..." His tone became more distant with each word, as if he was slowing falling asleep. </p><p>While I smirked pouring another glass for myself. </p><p>"Will you stop now? Yoongi, are you okay?" Namjoon chided me before patted Yoongi's back with concern. </p><p>Yoongi didn't say anything and only showed a thumbs up with his head still down.</p><p>"Why don't you take a glass too teacher-nim?" I mocked. "Too afraid?" </p><p>"You're drunk Soomi." Namjoon looked away from the glass I was offering.</p><p>Now I got really annoyed. My conscience was as clear, as lucid as sun rays on a hot summer noon. I couldn't get why he was getting worked up by himself. </p><p>"Why are you even here? Do I look drunk? I bet, I can solve math questions even in this state. You—" I stopped and took my phone that was lying on the table, vibrating. "Oh, Hyemi texted me again!" I quickly tapped on the new messages from her. </p><p>"Where do you live? In this neighbourhood, right?" Namjoon asked but I wasn't looking at him. I was fully concentrated on my phone. </p><p>"What Yoongi said today, do you really think I should date Hyemi?" I ignored his question and mumbled to myself. </p><p>"Well, he said you should date me too. He's just crazy. Don't let what he says get it to you," his deep voice echoed in my empty head. My eyes were closed.  </p><p>When I opened my eyes, they landed on my phone's screen, and my heart fell to the pit of my stomach right the instant. Bile starting to rise in my throat. </p><p>"What the fuck have I done!" I screamed, making Yoongi jerk up from his position but then his head fell again involuntarily. </p><p>"What? Are you hurt?" Namjoon shouted back standing up from his seat.</p><p>"Oh my god I—" I gasped clasping my mouth as I still couldn't believe what text I'd just sent her. "I— I sent her a text, asking if she'd go on a date with me tomorrow!" </p><p>"What!?" Namjoon shouted again, making the bustling restaurant go quiet for a second. </p><p>Yoongi only showed a thumbs up saying nothing else. </p><p>"What do I do, I— When did I!" Panic rose in my voice. </p><p>"See! That's why I told you not to drink! You always do idiotic stuff like this!" Namjoon chastised, agitated at me. </p><p>"How do I delete this! Oh my God, she just.., she just texted me back!" My eyes went wide as I kept shouting. </p><p>"She said yes!"</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Sunshine guy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>This was wrong.</p><p>DEAD WRONG.</p><p>I asked out a girl I didn't like romantically, and my first ever date was going to waste away like that, me telling her that I had sent that text accidentally. </p><p>A deep sigh left my mouth as I stood there, waiting for Hyemi. And I couldn't help but think maybe, just maybe, I could take Yoongi's advice and actually go on a date with her. She was a nice person and my type of girl but then, anyone was my type of girl. So this seemed wrong, somehow. </p><p>Moreover, I could hurt her. Using her to find out my sexuality was the worst ever agenda. Right now, I was sorta-kinda-REALLY hating myself.</p><p>I looked at my watch again then stared ahead. 4' o clock, she would be here any second.</p><p>Maybe I should text her, I thought, and took out my cellphone. </p><p>She had gone all her way suggesting me to wear something red because she wanted to match with me. I wore an oversized burgundy-red sweatshirt, matching it with faded jeans and white sneakers. </p><p>As I opened the chatbox, I could feel someone standing beside me, peering over my shoulders. It was probably a guy, judging by their height and appearance. Wearing all black. Though I hadn't looked up, I could feel him taking a peek at my phone. </p><p>"What's your problem mister?" </p><p>I calmly asked looking up. It was a young male in his twenties, wearing a cap so long that covered half of his face.</p><p>"You.. are Hyemi's date?" He asked with his tone filled with hesitance. </p><p>I scrunched up my eyebrows, thinking if I should tell him or not. Was he a stalker of some sorts?</p><p>"Yeah? Who are you?"</p><p>He took a good look at me from head to toe. "You're a girl?" </p><p>I didn't say anything since the answer was obvious. A girl could definitely date another girl. What was his problem?</p><p>He kept on observing me, meticulously. Eventually he looked up, his eyes met mine. Then they started to go down, and rested on my chest. </p><p>"Do you want to see my boobs to confirm?" </p><p>He looked up at me again baffled, as I crossed my arms over my chest. I'd wondered all my life if I actually looked like a guy with freaky long hair but what he was doing here was plain rude.</p><p>He suddenly took off his cap and bright red hair sprouted from underneath. Without another word, he took a ninety degrees bow. </p><p>"Sorry if I seemed rude! I'm Jung Hoseok, Jung Hyemi's older brother!" He shouted out loud.</p><p>Now he was making me uncomfortable. "Oh, um, okay. T-this was a mistake, I came to tell her that." For some reasons, I started stuttering.</p><p>"Please." He held my hand abruptly but let go right after. "Please let me apologize properly." </p><p>This time, I took a good look at his face. </p><p>He was incredibly handsome.</p><p>I didn't know how this happened, but five minutes later, I found myself in a cafe, sitting in front of him with a dumb expression on. While he was checking the menu with a huge smile plastered on his face, shaking his legs in rhythm like some nursery kid. </p><p>He had a nice face but there was this aura coming from him that screamed sunshine or angel of some sorts. He reeked of energy, too much energy for me because I got tired just by watching him. </p><p>"What do you want?" He showed me a toothy grin, handing me the menu. </p><p>"Ah, nothing! I don't even know what I'm doing here," I mumbled out. "Your apology was enough. You don't have to pay for my lunch." </p><p>"No! I have too. You're my sister's friend." </p><p>"It's fine, really." I protested, my voice meek against his boisterously loud one.</p><p>"No, no! You helped her right? Why else would she save your contact as 'my hero' on her phone?" Suddenly, he leaned a bit closer, and started whispering as if he was telling me a big secret. </p><p>"Don't think that I stalk my sister's phone or anything. These days she just seems so happy when she's usually down after coming home from college. And then I suddenly saw your text and thought some boy was tricking her. You know, she's been bullied a lot since childhood so I got really worried." </p><p>He moved back, rubbing the back of his head with an apologetic look on his face. "I'm really sorry if I scared you today. Since she's grown up I shouldn't have pried in her business. So yeah, the person who texted you back yesterday was me. She didn't see them because she went to sleep early." </p><p>I felt a little sad, realizing that he didn't know his sister had still gotten bullied. If he heard about that, he'd definitely worry. </p><p>"Don't worry about your sister. Since she has me, I'll protect her at college, you protect her at home," I exhaled after saying what I wanted. </p><p>He stared at me for a second and then showed the biggest smile I'd ever seen, on anyone's face before. </p><p>"Thank you! We're a team now. Okay?" He held out his hand towards me confidently. "I'm Jung Hoseok. 23 years old and I'm a dance instructor." </p><p>"I'm Park Soomi, 20 years old. Majoring in English." I took his hand and shook it. </p><p>"Are you free today?" </p><p>"Depends. Why?" </p><p>"I like your attitude!" He let out a loud chuckle. "I got some coupons to sungjyung gaming arcade. Hyemi would hate joining me. Maybe you and I could go?" </p><p>Coming to think of it, he was the complete opposite of Hyemi. Pretty much nothing alike. He was filled with confidence, while Hyemi was shy and nervous. </p><p>"Yeah. But I'm pretty much sure you'll lose all the games with me." </p><p>***</p><p>"Man, I can't believe I lost all the games!" Hoseok sighed looking up at the night sky. It was nine pm already, time went by fast with him today. </p><p>"Believe me, I'm actually not that bad okay?" He looked at me, saying that in a serious face. </p><p>"I believe you." I gave him a serious face in return and that made him laugh. I couldn't but join too.</p><p>"Hey, I'm sorry if I was rude to you today. You thought I'd mistaken you for a dude, right?" He suddenly halted in his way and said. </p><p>"It's okay. It's natural to think like that." </p><p>"No, it's not. You're actually really pretty." </p><p>Did I hear him wrong? I had to stop in my track to look into his eyes but he broke off eye contact with me. </p><p>"Why do I feel embarrassed suddenly?" He let out a energetic cackle which made a few street dogs wake up from their slumber to bark at him. </p><p>"Oh my god!" He screamed hearing their barking noise and jumped behind me. This all happening in mere seconds. </p><p>"They're not gonna bite you," I retorted, controlling my laughter that was creeping in. </p><p>"I know. But—" </p><p>"Come on!" I laughed as I held his arm tightly and started walking since he was too afraid to move from his spot. </p><p>After we had walked further away from the dogs, I let go off him and stretched my arms out in the process. "Today was a long day. Have to go home now." </p><p>"Soomi-sshi." His sudden change of tone made me turn around. His otherwise luminating voice was wavering and frail. </p><p>"Do you have a boyfriend?" He asked staring into my eyes, a small smile plastered on his face. </p><p>"No," I answered. </p><p>"Can we exchange numbers? Since we became teammates and all." He smiled again. I just realized he had cute dimples close to his lips. </p><p>Namjoon has dimples too.</p><p>Why did I just think that? "Sure," I told him and pulled out my phone from my pocket. After that, I gave it to him.</p><p>"You know, I'm quite annoying," he said as he typed in his number on my phone. </p><p>"I'll text you a lot. Is that okay?" He then gave me my phone back. </p><p>"I don't think I'll reply to most of them. Is that okay?" I asked him instead. </p><p>"I like your attitude." This time he didn't laugh but said it with a smile on his face. </p><p>I didn't know why, but that just reminded me of Hyemi. The way she said that she wanted to call me oppa. </p><p>"Do you live close by?" He looked around the block and asked. </p><p>"No, it's the next neighbourhood. Bye now." </p><p>"Wait." He came and caught up to me. "Let me walk you home all the way. Else I'd worry." </p><p>"Soomi!" A sudden scream made us both look ahead. </p><p>Namjoon was standing there a few feet away from us. Sweating as his wet shirt stuck to his body, his brown hair a complete mess. Before I could realize what was going on he came and held my hand. </p><p>"I'll take you home." He let out a breath and started pulling me with force, making me walk with him.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. He was just a teacher</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I'll take you home."</p><p>Namjoon started pulling me forcefully. Before I could protest, I realized I'd walked a few steps ahead with him. </p><p>"Hey, wait!" Hoseok shouted from the back. He was probably shocked to see this happen all of a sudden. Namjoon did appear out of nowhere. </p><p>"It's okay. He's just my teacher," I managed to say as I was still being dragged by my arm. Namjoon wouldn't even look behind. How rude, and weird. </p><p>Hoseok stood there frozen in the spot, seeming awestruck, so I shouted again, "You can go home, it's okay." </p><p>"Okay...," He mouthed and soon I was out of his sight. </p><p>"Dude, what's wrong with you!" I couldn't keep silent anymore. I had to use my strength to get away from Namjoon's hold. "Why did you...," </p><p>I trudged off, slowly rubbing my lower arm with my other hand where his grip was, till now. He watched me and his facial expression relaxed a little. "Did I hurt you?" </p><p>"What's wrong with you!" I avoided his question and asked it again. Was it really Namjoon in front of me? I'd never seen him like that before.</p><p>"No," Namjoon said in a calm tone. "What's wrong with you?" </p><p>"What do you mean?" </p><p>"Did you even know that guy?" He grimaced. "You were hanging out with a stranger!" </p><p>"I..., Wait, how did you know I was hanging out with a stranger?" I asked, suspicion rising in my mind. </p><p>Namjoon crossed his arms over his chest, seemingly irritated. "I saw Hyemi at college this afternoon, at that exact time you were supposed to be out on a date with her. So I asked her and she said she had classes till evening. And guess what? Yoongi saw you hanging out with a random guy today! I know you want to find someone, and desperately fall in love, but does that mean you can just hang out with people you don't even know?"</p><p>"He was Hyemi's brother." </p><p>"I'm sorry if I hurt you there, sorry if I'm getting overly involved now, but even if he is her brother, you only got to know him. There are all kinds of people in this world. You were out with him almost till midnight and this isn’t really a safe block!" He kept going on, and I didn't have anything to say in my defence, though he was getting on my nerves. </p><p>"Why do you care!" </p><p>"Because I don't wanna live with guilt if something happens to you. Rest of my life I'd think that I knew you could be in trouble but I didn't save you." </p><p>"Oh. That's why you were looking for me? To make yourself feel better?" I didn't know why I felt disappointed. Maybe, I wanted him to say that he cared. That would've been a better answer. He was an acquintance of mine, after all.</p><p>So, I started walking ahead before I'd actually hit him. "Selfish person." </p><p>"What selfish person? Don't you even care for your family Soomi? I'm sure they are worried sick now." His tone was calmer than before as he started walking behind me. "If my daughter hung out with a guy she didn't know until this late at night I'd actually get a heart attack." </p><p>"I'm not your daughter." I said, my words dripping with annoyance. "My mom is at work now and my brother still hasn't came back from the trip." </p><p>"Well, your dad—" </p><p>"I don't have a dad," I said without looking behind. "He left us when we were kids." </p><p>It was silent for a while, and I kept on walking ahead. I would've forgotten his existence if he didn't speak again. </p><p>"I'm sorry." </p><p>"Why are you following me?" I changed the topic, halting on my way then looking back at his face. </p><p>"I live in this neighbourhood." He stopped in his tracks and answered looking right into my eyes. </p><p>"We've crossed your place already and you're still here." </p><p>My eyes wouldn't budge from his stare. It was pretty late at night, and the neighbourhood was quiet with no living being out on the street except for us. I felt a cold breeze brushing past my body, making my loose hair run wild, so I tugged a few strands behind my ear. </p><p>There was a few feet distance between us and I didn't know what I'd suddenly felt. My heart was aching a little all of a sudden and I wondered why. </p><p>"If you get bored staying at home all day I'll spend time with you." He shoved his hands inside his pockets. Another gust of wind hit us making his soft hair brush against his forehead. </p><p>"Yeah. But why are you following me?" </p><p>"Because it's late at night and you're my student. I shouldn't let you go home alone like this." He shrugged with his shoulders. </p><p>I didn't say anything back and started walking again. </p><p>Yeah. </p><p>He was just a teacher.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. She was just a teacher</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
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</p><p>"I was worried." </p><p>"I didn't ask you anything." Yoongi yawned in front of me, his eyes dripping off boredom.</p><p>"I mean, just imagine me finding out that girl was in college when she was supposed to be in a date with Soomi. Of course, I'd get worried, right?" I said it fast in one breath, sitting at the edge of my seat waiting, not-so-patiently for Yoongi's answer. </p><p>"You sound annoying." He yawned again. </p><p>"I know." I huffed out the breath I was holding, while letting my tensed shoulders relax. "I know I sound annoying but—" </p><p>"Now you sound like a girl." </p><p>"Do I?" I frowned. What I did last night made me seem so petty, but I couldn't help that. Since she was my student, and I knew her close to a personal level, it was natural that I'd worry. Or was it not?</p><p>"Does she remind you of someone?" Yoongi said in a low voice, making me look up at his sleepy eyes. </p><p>"Who?" I asked, bewildered.</p><p>"I hope you don't make the same mistake again." He got up from his seat. "Doesn't your class start in ten minutes?" </p><p>"Yeah." I checked my watch, and grabbed my coat in the meantime. "But tell me what you were talking about." </p><p>"Nothing." Stretching his arms out, he left the office after heaving yet another silent and heavy yawn. </p><p>***</p><p>"Remember to bring me the essay on your current favorite modern English novel, comparing the writing and the setting with a classic favourite of yours next class. Do not make it long. You do not have to work too hard on this. It wouldn't affect your exam papers either. It'll just help me get a good insight on each of you and I want to get to know you better." I smiled at the end of my lecture and the class bell rang just then. Perfect timing.</p><p>The students started getting up from their seats, leaving the classroom in a hurry, bodies jostling against each other. Some took it slow. I was rearranging the books on my table but from the corner of my eyes, I noticed Soomi getting ready to leave. </p><p>When she came up to the door, completely ignoring my existence after everyone had left, I couldn't help but run up to her. </p><p>"Soomi!" I called out her name making her stop, but she wouldn't turn my way or look at my face. </p><p>"What?" She said, still looking down. </p><p>"Look at me." </p><p>"Why?" </p><p>"Oh look, a cat in the classroom!" I shouted and she immediately turned around. </p><p>"How could you fall for that?" I was genuinely surprised that she actually turned, but thankfully I could see her face clearly this time. "I was right, you did hurt your face." </p><p>A crease appeared between her brows as she shook her head furiously to the sides, making her bangs cover up her forehead marred with the dark bruise. </p><p>"None of your business!" She spat, and I struggled to contain my laughter. </p><p>She was like a stray cat you'd want to take care of, because it was helpless, and adorable but it would keep getting angry at you even if you showed care, probably because no one cared for it before, or it didn't like that small gesture. Though, even its grumpiness would make you want to care for it more. </p><p>I heaved a small sigh looking at her eyes that were screaming annoyance. "Since I'm your teacher and since I saw it, of course it's my business. Let's go to my office. I have a first aid kit." </p><p>"I don't want to!" She cried like a small child. I laughed silently walking a few steps ahead so she wouldn't see me. </p><p>"I'm not hearing 'no' for an answer. Aren't you coming?" I looked back and asked. She let out a frustrated groan, before she started following me, leaving heavy footsteps behind. </p><p>***</p><p>"What is it with you? Can't you be more gentle!" </p><p>She hissed under her breath as soon as I'd touched her forehead with a piece of cotton dipped in medicine. "Just put a band aid on it. What the hell are you doing?" She moved her head back, giving me that infuriated look again. </p><p>It was somewhat hilarious to me that the very expression terrified me when I first got to know her. In the course of only a few days, to me, it felt like a lot had changed in the dynamics of my relationship with her.</p><p>"I'm not a nurse but even I know that you have to clean the wounded place first." I explained holding the side of her head. "Now come here, it'll sting a bit at first but you'll be fine later." </p><p>"Do it slowly, for God's sake." She flinched when I blew at her injury. </p><p>"Almost done," I said, rolling my shirt's sleeves up to my arms. "Bandaid, bandaid," mumbling to myself I searched for them in the drawers. "Say, how did you get such a big one this time? Who were you fighting?" </p><p>"No one." She shrugged. I leaned closer to her with the bandaid I'd found. </p><p>"Don't tell me you just fell on your face flat for no reason." </p><p>"I did, but not for 'no reason'. I was, ah, trying to play football in the back of my house by my own," she murmured, and I moved away since I was done. </p><p>"Your brother isn't home yet?" </p><p>"He will be, the day after tomorrow." </p><p>"Then let's play football together tomorrow." I suggested starting to clean off the table, putting back the medicines and everything where it belonged. "Maybe we can invite Yoongi too and play basketball since he's good at that." </p><p>"Forget it. I don't wanna be a burden." She got up from her seat, heaving a small sigh. </p><p>"You wouldn't be a burden. I feel like I haven't worked out properly in a long time. I need to work out, play and stuff!"</p><p>"Then why do you have those biceps?"  She pointed at my upper arms with her eyes. </p><p>"Ah, those?" I looked at my left arm to the sides, holding onto my jacket. "Do they consider as biceps? Wait, is my shirt too tight? I shouldn't have worn—" </p><p>"Man just look at them biceps." Soomi's voice made me look up at her. She was making a frame with her fingers that was probably capturing my biceps. "I'm so jealous." </p><p>"Why? For this?" I flexed my muscle and she quickly looked away. </p><p>"Don't even. Just don't!" She fake cried biting her lower lip hard. "Do you even know how hard it is for normal people like us to build a bicep when yours are natural? God is unfair!" </p><p>I couldn't contain my laughter anymore. I bursted out in laughter and I kept on laughing. It felt like I hadn't lost myself like this in ages. </p><p>"What? Because I'm a girl you're telling me I shouldn't get abs? Or biceps?" She asked looking offended so I tried calming down.</p><p>"No, it's just that, no one has ever told it to me like this before. And of course, you should get some abs if you want. Gender should never matter." </p><p>"Good." She narrowed her eyes on me. "Now tell me, how did you know I'd hurt my face?" </p><p>"I just guessed," I answered, getting ready to leave the nurse's room and she was too.</p><p>"Don't ever do that again." She turned around all of a sudden, making me bump with her but I halted at the right time. </p><p>We were standing really close. </p><p>So close, that I could see her dark eyes clearly, underneath those bangs and her lashes. Actually, they weren't fully black but a little brown too.</p><p>"Don't guess stupid stuff," she murmured, making me look down at her lips. </p><p>"I will keep guessing them." I moved away from her. Giving her angry face another look, I started walking ahead. "See you tomorrow for morning lessons Soomi." </p><p>I shouldn't have felt flustered like I did just now. </p><p>I thought it was only care that I'd felt for her.</p><p>
  <i>She was just a student.</i>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. The line between us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
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</p><p>"Let's go to a field trip today." </p><p>"Why?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow. I was here at Namjoon's place like every other day for my early morning endeavours but he here he was, looking like he was ready to go outside. </p><p>"Yeah, let's go to a library today," he said picking up his round spectacles from the table. I followed him to the main door where he pulled out keys to lock the door from this outside. </p><p>"Which library?" I asked, a little dumbfounded. </p><p>"There's a library here, right in this neighbourhood, you didn't know?" </p><p>"Well, I, I'm not a nerd like you!" I defended myself. "You only came here and you already know about libraries?" </p><p>He flashed me a smile showing off his deep dimples. "It's been more than a week since I'm here. Of course, I'd know." </p><p>The weather was warm outside, not warm like it would bake you with the heat of the scalding sun. It was sunny, yet a cool breeze was following us around. Namjoon walked silently ahead of me. The streets were scarce of people this early, only a few school-girls sauntering here and there with their heavy bags, and droopy eyes. I noticed them stealing glances at him. </p><p>He looked fine today. With his hair messy, round specs on his face, blue and white striped shirt and faded jeans. The look suited him. Though I didn't know why, he was feeling a little different today. </p><p>Today, for the first time he felt like a teacher to me. Other days he'd feel like a friend who was older, or, maybe it was just my well wishes. Today I couldn't find things to talk about while we were walking and he just felt like someone I didn't know. </p><p>He took some turns and stopped in front of an age-old, cavernous library. He then held the glass door for me to go inside. </p><p>As soon as I'd entered, I couldn't help but let out a soft gasp. There were tons of wooden shelves reaching the high ceiling, all filled with old and new, and all kinds of books.</p><p>I was never a true bookworm, but this place fascinated me. The old musty and woody scent of the shelves, and burnt candles and incense, and those books were really something. It was calm, serene with no other people but us and the old librarian. Time stopped right here. </p><p>"You're really something!" I whispered excitedly, following Namjoon's footsteps. "How come I never—" </p><p>"That's because I always look for a library first thing whenever I move to somewhere." He didn't let me finish and shoved a few thick books to my hands. His eyes wandered off to the shelves looking for more.</p><p>"I'll let you borrow some books with my library card, since you don't have one. You have to take good care of them, okay?" </p><p>"Yes, sir!" I mocked. "But why today?" </p><p>"It's your last day for a lesson anyway, isn't it?" He said still being busy with the books. </p><p>How did he know I wouldn't seek any more help from him starting tomorrow?</p><p>I wanted to ask, but seeing him so busy, I couldn't. Rest of the time, we didn't speak at all. He borrowed some books and we went out of the library where the sun greeted us back. I was holding two heavy bags filled with books.</p><p>As we stood outside I looked back at the library and read the name aloud that was written as a wall paint. "Omelas." </p><p>Namjoon looked back too, then glanced at me. "The name was taken from a book, most probably." </p><p>"Really? What kind of book?" I asked eagerly, even though him being like that felt uncomfortable and stuffy to me. For the first tim,e I was finding it awkward, spending time with him. </p><p>"It's about a town and some friends. I have that book, you can borrow it from me if you want," he answered, and then it was quiet again, us standing there as if we didn't know what to do next. And we really didn't.</p><p>"Do you want to get some ice cream?" He said, looking above at the scorching sun. The weather was starting to get hot, it wasn't cool like before anymore. "Come on."</p><p>He started walking ahead, and I almost stumbled on the way to catch up to him.</p><p>"I will pay for my own," I announced. I saw him coming back a few steps, then taking a bag from my hands. </p><p>"It's fine to let your teacher pay once in a while." </p><p>We silently walked up to an icecream parlour. I felt like a kid seeing him pay for my cone of ice cream but I didn't protest again, knowing it wouldn't work.</p><p>We trotted out of the store, there were tables and chairs decorated outside, umbrellas shading them from the heat. He took a seat, I did the same quietly. </p><p>It was stuffy again. </p><p>"How did you know I wouldn't come for lessons from tomorrow?" I asked a little hesitantly. </p><p>"Doesn't your brother come back tomorrow?" He questioned back. "And your friends too. That would mean you wouldn't be bored anymore. Also from what I've seen, you've improved a lot in a week. You don't hesitate so much with your grammar. Your vocabulary increased a lot. The books I gave you today, if you read them thoroughly you'll be fine with your general writing." </p><p>"Are you kicking me out?" I shouted, trying to look offended. "Even though, you're right." </p><p>"See?" He chuckled by himself. "My friends say I'm good at observing the psychology of people around me." </p><p>"Yeah." I nodded, starting to eat my ice-cream since I didn't have anything else to talk about. </p><p>He was right. I realized that I was getting good at it, solving my own problems so I thought I wouldn't bother him anymore. But it kind of hurt hearing it from his mouth. Maybe, I wanted to be the one to call it off. </p><p>"You know, Yoongi told me something yesterday." Namjoon's sudden voice snapped me back from my thoughts. "I didn't quite understand what he was referring to, but I do now."</p><p>He had such a serious look on his face I started to feel a little scared inside. "What did he say?" </p><p>"He asked me if you reminded me of someone. Which was absurd, because I've truly never seen anyone like you before. Then again, everyone is different and unique in my opinion." Namjoon paused a little, then he started to speak again. </p><p>"Later I realized, he wasn't talking about the actual person, but the feeling I get from this certain someone, and he asked if it was similar to the feeling I'd gotten from another person before. When I thought about it, he was right. You do remind me of someone." </p><p>"Who?" I asked, breathless. His words felt like riddles. I could understand, yet I couldn't get the gist of it. </p><p>"A childhood friend I had throughout middle school, and high school at Ilsan. Funny thing is you two are nothing alike. She was a crybaby and a really sensitive person. She'd cry whenever she'd get hurt, and for some reasons, she always got hurt. That was a lot of crying." Namjoon smiled by himself looking at somewhere behind me. </p><p>"I'd look out for her, though she didn't like it. She didn't like it when people cared for her. I couldn't help myself either. I kept getting myself involved. As a friend, I thought I could do that. I wonder, how she is now." He looked like he was talking to himself, as if I wasn't there. </p><p>"You aren't friends with her anymore?" </p><p>I didn't know why I wasn't liking it, being compared to his friend. Why though? Maybe, I was disappointed. In what? </p><p>"No, but I'm sure she's fine now. She better be." Namjoon then smiled at me. "I think I've annoyed you a lot the past days. I'm really sorry for that." </p><p>And suddenly, I felt this stinging pain in my heart, but I kept my face nonchalant. Why was I feeling so disappointed?</p><p>"Yeah, but why are you telling me all these?" </p><p>"Soomi," Namjoon mumbled my name looking right into my eyes. "Do you know the big difference between you and the person I just told you about?"</p><p>"I think I know," I murmured, he didn't seem to hear it. </p><p>"You're a student and she is a same-age friend; she was," he said, and we stayed silent for a few seconds after that. </p><p>"Are you done?" He asked me, I only nodded in reply. He got up. </p><p>"Take good care of those books, okay? Be careful on your way home and see you at class tomorrow." He flashed me another bright smile. </p><p>"Yes, sir." I got up to bid him goodbye. I wasn't really mocking this time. </p><p>Soon I saw his wide back disappear from my sight. What was this stinging pain I felt in my heart? </p><p>He didn't have to draw that student teacher line between us. </p><p>Because I was already aware of it.</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. He was just being nice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"You're here?" I asked Jungkook who was standing in front of my doorstep holding onto his bicycle, looking all ready to go somewhere. </p><p>So he had probably come with Taehyung who was inside, jamming over rap songs with my brother Jimin. </p><p>"Yeah," Jungkook said with a poker face on, standing still like that. </p><p>"You're not going inside?" I asked, moving aside from the door.</p><p>"Nah, I'm good." He shrugged dismissively. "I've been slacking off too much with hyungs. I should actually attend my classes today."</p><p>"You were waiting for me? Let me guess." I crossed my arms over my chest, making a face as if I was thinking hard to myself. "Your dumbass needs help with the things that you missed in class. Right?" </p><p>"Yeah." He gave me a huge toothy grin. </p><p>"Knew it." I started to walk ahead, he joined me, pushing his bicycle by his side.</p><p>"Do you even know there was a short test two days ago?" I asked next, making his calm expression waver. </p><p>"Eh? Really?" He licked his dried lip, glanced at me then glanced at the road again. </p><p>I found it so funny, seeing him terrified but I didn't laugh. Poor one had it hard already after scoring four out of fifty in our last quiz. </p><p>"Yeah," I stated. "I think you should talk to Namjoon after class today, and request him to solely take your exam." </p><p>He didn't seem to like the idea because if it was professor Choi, he would never agree, because Jungkook did slack off and he had to face the consequences. Although, knowing Namjoon, it was sure that he wouldn't be so hard on Jungkook. </p><p>"Don't worry, I'll accompany you after class," I said with a little sigh. Jungkook hummed in reply at first and later he asked me why. </p><p>"Just because." I took a moment to answer. </p><p>I had almost told him that Namjoon was like a friend to me. </p><p>When he wasn't. </p><p>***</p><p>"Go!" I gave a light push on Jungkook's back, whispering, though no one else was here except for us and Namjoon. "Talk to him!" I whispered again. </p><p>It was afternoon when the literature class was over, and everyone had left one by one already, Namjoon was leaving  too until Jungkook ran up to him. </p><p>"Um, Mr Namjoon!" He called out from the back, making him halt and turn back. In the meantime, I slowly crept up to Jungkook's side. </p><p>"Oh, you!" Namjoon made a face like he was trying to remember something. "You are-" </p><p>"I'm Jeon Jungkook," Jungkook replied hurriedly, Namjoon nodded at acknowledgement.</p><p>"You haven't been attending classes almost for a week now. There was a tutorial exam out of twenty five. That mark ought to be converted and seventy five percent of it would be added in the semester exam." Namjoon explained, I could see Jungkook breaking out in sweat already. </p><p>"Sir, I—" </p><p>"It's okay, I'll take your exam. Another student missed out on it since his mom was sick. I'll take his exam later this week so you can attend it too with him." Namjoon gave Jungkook a reassuring smile. "And no need to call me sir, please, Mr. Kim or Namjoon would be fine." </p><p>"Thank you so much, Mr Kim." Jungkook gave a short bow of gratitude even though he was still petrified.</p><p>"It's okay, it's no problem really. Fighting!" Namjoon cheered for him, then got ready to leave. "I'll get going, Jungkook, and, Soomi." </p><p>He glanced at us before going away. </p><p>That was... What was I expecting there? He did acknowledge me but why did it feel like I was invisible in his eyes? </p><p>All the time he had his eye on Jungkook, not giving me one bit of his attention— which was legit, because Jungkook was the one who needed to talk to him. Though until the end, Namjoon didn't look at me for once. </p><p>He felt so different unlike the other days. </p><p>"Yo, why are you stunned like this?" Jungkook pushed me lightly on the shoulders. "Did you fall for him too?" </p><p>"Yeah," I replied in a daze. "Wait, what?" </p><p>"You're just staring like— never mind. Mr Kim is so kind like— whoa, there I still feel so nervous. I never thought it would go this smoothly!" </p><p>"Yeah," I mumbled. </p><p>"He's amazing! But now I need help! I haven't studied at all this week; I never do study. You need to help me okay? Oi, are you even listening?" </p><p>"Yeah." I breathed out, realizing that we were outside. We had been walking while Jungkook was blabbering like that. It was surprising to me because I hadn't even noticed that we were walking until now. </p><p>I looked around while Jungkook unlocked his cycle that was lined up with the other bicycles outside. Suddenly something caught my eyes. </p><p>"Kook-ah, let me ride your bicycle." I looked away and focused on Jungkook. </p><p>"Why?" He questioned, furrowing his eyebrows. "I don't want to. Plus the gear hasn't been working properly since this morning." </p><p>"Just let me!" I shouted making him flinch a little. Seriously, why was I so annoyed? </p><p>"The gear changes randomly okay? You can even hurt yourself if you go up to fullspeed and knowing you, I can see that happening." Jungkook protested for the last time but I had already made my way to his cycle. "At least let me ride it?? You can sit on the carrier!" </p><p>"You know I don't like that? Sitting on the carrier, holding onto a guy's waist like it's some romantic fanfic." I shoved him aside. </p><p>"You're hopeless!" He threw his arms in the air, frustrated. </p><p>I didn't say anything and hopped on the bicycle. It was bigger and heavier than the one I had at home. My feet could barely touch the ground but I wanted to do something. </p><p>Something that could distract my mind from what I had just seen. </p><p>I started paddling slowly at first. When I got a hold of it, I increased my speed. I looked ahead breathing in and out. My long hair flying by my sides as the strong gusts of afternoon wind hit my face roughly, the sun dipping somewhere far in the horizon. </p><p>I was irritated, agitated, furious, everything that could possibly go with the term 'angry.'</p><p>What I saw back there was this girl stumbling, almost falling on the ground. Namjoon catching her before that could happen, smiling as he asked her if anything was wrong. Then walking rest of the way by her side so she wouldn't fall again. </p><p>He was a nice guy. Plus anyone would help someone from tripping and falling flat on their faces. </p><p>I would've done that too. But they were laughing, talking together and they looked nice. The girl seemed familiar too. She was probably from our class. </p><p>So Namjoon was like that to everyone. He was just nice to, everyone. </p><p>
  <i>He was just nice to me. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I wasn't anything special. It was just him being nice and worried for a student. That was about it. I really wasn’t his friend, just like he had told me. He just wanted to help me because not only did I look like a damsel in distress (the girl trope I hated so much in fictions), but also because I was his student. I was temporarily under his supervision. </p><p>Suddenly I realized that the bicycle was going extremely fast in an unusual speed. I pushed the left break lightly but nothing happened. </p><p>There were a few people on the road and it was getting hard to control the bike. My feet couldn't properly reach the ground when I tried to stop it using my legs, instead I felt pain when my ankle hit the paddle, and before I had realized it, I had fallen by the side of the road with the bike on top of me. </p><p>It hurt. The bike was so heavy I couldn't push it off of me.</p><p>How could this happen? I'd always won in a bicycle race with Jungkook when we were teens. </p><p>"Gosh! You brainless girl!" Thinking of the devil, I saw Jungkook looking at me standing there with sweat dropping down his forehead as he huffed and puffed for air. I didn't know he was running after me all this time. </p><p>"Hi." I smiled at him apologetically, even though I was sure there was a good amount of cuts on my arms and legs. </p><p>He gave me an annoyed look then put his bicycle away. He helped me stand as I was grimacing in pain. It hurt everywhere. </p><p>"Are you okay?" He sighed, observing me from head to toe. "Forget it. Let's go to a doctor." </p><p>"You care for me? Aw!" I spoke, gritting my teeth to hide the pain as I held onto my knees. </p><p>"I care for my cycle. Look what you did to it!" He exclaimed pointing at his bike with his eyes. "You broke one of the breaks!" </p><p>Indeed one of the breaks were hanging there helplessly. Looking like it was struck by multiple thunderbolts. </p><p>"Yeah, sorry, I, ow!" I yelped in pain when I tried to walk with him. He came closer and took my arm, then he snaked it around his shoulder. </p><p>"Let's get to the doctor else Jimin will kill me later." </p><p>I chuckled at him and we continued walking like that. </p><p>
  <i>I was right. Namjoon was definitely just being nice to me.</i>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Notice me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <i>Teachers can be your friend too. </i>
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  <i></i>
</p><p>I felt determined today, staring at Namjoon so intensely that it could burn holes in his face if that was possible. </p><p>He was busy with the lecture. He wouldn't spare me a glance, so I furrowed my eyebrows and kept staring at him intently, and staring, and staring more, and waiting for the class to be over. </p><p>I wouldn't know just what came over me yesterday. My period hadn't started yet I felt like a demon ready to devour human souls. And then there was a moment of epiphany, I realized what was wrong with me. </p><p>Because I had already thought of him as a friend it was uncomfortable for me to see him avoiding me like that, treating others the same way when I thought we had formed a special relationship. </p><p>Of course, Namjoon was brilliant, he had skipped grades, became a lecturer at such a young age but he had some lackings in his head. </p><p>His friend was his friend. I was his student and for that very reason, I had a better position. I could be student, and, a friend too.</p><p>I smirked by myself, beyond amazed by my thoughts. Really I never would've thought Namjoon could be a good friend to me despite him being my teacher, until he started avoiding me. </p><p>Namjoon checked his wristwatch and called it a day. Everyone quickly took off their seats and started to leave, but I sat there calmly. </p><p>"Wow, what's wrong with your face?" Jungkook came and stood in front of me, blocking my view of Namjoon arranging his desk. </p><p>"You look so..., weird. What's with that expression?" Jungkook shivered by himself, observing my face with skepticism. </p><p>"Go. I have work to do." I grabbed my bag seeing that Namjoon was leaving the room. I bolted ahead to catch up with the tall guy. </p><p>"Oh, are my bandages showing?" I turned around and asked a surprised Jungkook just before leaving through the door. </p><p>"Ah, yeah. Wha-" </p><p>Not giving him another chance to talk, I started running through the empty hallway. After I had 'almost' severely injured myself yesterday, the remedy was to attach a few patches on my arms and legs (which were invisible for my jeans and shirt). There were two other cuts around my cheek area and the forehead and I had band-aids covering those places. </p><p>Hyemi was concerned when she saw me today. I was surprised Namjoon didn't even notice. </p><p>"Hey!" I ran up to Namjoon who was walking pretty fast on the hallway to his office, holding a few books in his hands. He didn't seem to hear me.</p><p>"Hi!" I breathed out, smiling at him as I walked by his side this time. He nodded, and slowered his pace to meet mine. </p><p>"How are you Soomi?" He smiled brightly at me for a second, then looked ahead again. </p><p>"I hurt myself." I piped, looking at his face eagerly to see his expression. </p><p>"Really?" He glanced at me again, and tjen he stopped walking. "You really did. How did this happen?" He scanned my face and asked in a worried voice. </p><p><i>He finally noticed! </i>"I got into an accident yesterday. I was riding a bicycle and hurt my arms and legs too." I started rolling the sleeves of my shirt too show him the cuts, excitedly as if this was something fun. </p><p>"Wait, wait!" Namjoon gestured his hands at me to stop. "Are they still hurting? You need to be more careful!" </p><p>
  <i>He got worried for me just like before.</i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"Be more careful next time. Though who am I to say, I'm a clumsy person myself." He sighed to himself. "So do you want a leave for that? I can excuse your next two attendance if it's severe." </p><p>"No! I just- I don't need a leave." I shook my head to the sides vigorously. </p><p>"You're okay then?" He asked, replacing the books to his other hand. </p><p>"Um, yeah." </p><p>
  <i>What should I talk about next? </i>
</p>
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</p><p>"Oh and I read that book. Omelas! It was amazing, really sad but amazing." I suddenly beamed at him, remembering about the book. </p><p>"Really?" A gentle smile spread across his full lips. "Try reading demian next time. I'm reading it now and it's pretty good."</p><p>"I will. I'm thinking of visiting the library you showed me and register myself there. So I could borrow books too." </p><p>I couldn't remember the last time I was this eager to talk. I was never a talkative person but I wanted to, today. And I wanted him to treat me like before. </p><p>"Do that. There are all kinds of book there," he retorted and checked his wristwatch. "I need to send my report to professor Cha." He looked up. "See you around Soomi." </p><p>
  <i>That was it? </i>
</p>
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</p><p>I stayed silent. He gave me another smile before he started to walk away. </p><p>Now I felt disheartened. I thought he would want to lend his book or help me with the library card or, at least show more care for my wounds. He would've definitely be like that even a few days ago. </p><p>
  <i>Hopeless. </i>
</p>
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</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I was walking absentmindedly, dragging my left leg with me since my ankle hurt. Until I felt someone's presence beside me and looked up to find a familiar face, smiling at me like the morning sun.</p><p>"Why do you look so sad today?" It was Hoseok, grinning at me as he asked. </p><p>"What are you doing here!" I was shocked to find him in the campus. </p><p>"Nothing. I came to pick up my sister," he answered, letting out a soft chuckle. "And I also hoped to see you!" </p><p>"Ah, really?" I commented seeing him so cheerful and happy. </p><p>"I haven't seen you for so long and you were right, you hardly ever do reply to my messages." He gave me a wary look. "I thought you were joking." </p><p>"I'm like that. Warned you though Hoseok-shi." </p><p>"Yeah, it's okay." He shook his hand in the air, dismissing me. "Are you free tomorrow?" </p><p>"Oppa, what are you doing here?" A voice made us look back to see a furious Hyemi dashing at us in full speed. "I told you never to show up here. I'm an university student now! Wait-" </p><p>She glanced at our faces as she stood beside me. "You know Soomi oppa?" </p><p>"Yeah, I- What??" Hoseok hollered to the top of his lungs. "Oppa?? When did she become your-? She's a girl, Hyemi!" </p><p>He was utterly confused, like he ought to be. </p><p>"It's a long story," I told him, albeit he was still looking conflicted.</p><p>"How do you two know each other?" Hyemi asked me curiously. </p><p>"We, I...," Hoseok started stuttering. It was clear that he didn't want to talk about it, but he couldn't lie to her face too.</p><p>"We met in a gaming arcade," I replied on his behalf. "We played a few rounds together and he lost them all." </p><p>"Wow, that sounds like a great first meeting." Hyemi beamed, right now she looked exactly like Hoseok. </p><p>"Y-yeah." Hoseok bobbed his head up and down, and then looked at me, so I gave him a reassuring smile. </p><p>"What were you to talking about? Oh, I was actually looking for you." Hyemi turned to me. "Since we both have an off-day tomorrow I thought maybe we could spend the day together? Like hanging out in a shopping mall and watching movies and stuff?" She blushed a little as she suggested. </p><p>"Soomi wouldn't like those," Hoseok said scanning my face. "I got free movie tickets from work. How about movies with me Soomi?" </p><p>"Really Jhope oppa?" Hyemi drawled her words in disbelief. "She's my friend, who are you to-" </p><p>"She's my friend too! And I would've taken you with us but you hate action movies!" Hoseok stared back at her blood boiling eyes. </p><p>"Wait, wait guys. It's tomorrow?" I asked to clarify. </p><p>"Yes!" Both of them replied together, then gave each other a blank stare. </p><p>"I have a thing tomorrow. I'm sorry but it's really important," I mumbled to myself, making Hoseok groan loudly. </p><p>"Really?" Hyemi said with her tone sad. "Then it can't be helped. What is it, though?" </p><p>"I have to go somewhere to study English tomorrow. Even though that person doesn't want to teach me privately, I'll have to try my luck!"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Smitten by her</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
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  <b></b>
</p><p>
  <i>Was this a dream?</i>
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  <i></i>
</p><p>I rubbed my sleepy eyes and peeled them open again, and Soomi was still standing in front of me, wearing that ever grimacing look on her face. </p><p>"Morning," she said, her voice flat. "Can I come inside and talk to you?"  </p><p>"Why are you here?" I asked meekly but stepped aside anyway. She barged inside like a storm. I followed her quick footsteps to the living room, only to find her plopping down on the mattress and taking out a few books from her bag, then placing them side by side on the table. </p><p>This was definitely a hallucination. Happens when your brain can't get enough oxygen so the hypothalamus starts showing things that actually isn't happening. </p><p>"I, ah, I'm going to go and wash my face," I muttered to myself and bolted inside. She was definitely here in person.</p><p>I had stayed up till late again, working on the idea of my thesis, and future plans away from the country. This entire week I had only slept for five hours tops every night, which was resulting my brain to go haywire. </p><p>After I was done splashing a good amount of water on my face, and cleansing my eyes a several times, I went back to the living room again. </p><p>"You took enough time." She was sitting there with her back straight, arms crossed over her chest. "I came here because I'm done going through all the materials you gave me last time. I need new books now." </p><p>I exhaled, taking a seat in front of her. I wasn’t even expecting to get the books back from her as surely it would've taken her more than three weeks to go through them all, or so I'd thought. "How did you finish reading them all in such a short period of time?" </p><p>"If you don't believe me, then take a quiz. Ask me something I wouldn't know." She said, staring into my eyes. "I even grew pimples for studying too much!" </p><p>She looked infuriated and I wondered why. </p><p>"Okay, I believe you. If you want to read more I think you can find books on your own. Just visit that library and—" I trailed off, taking a notebook and a pen that were lying on the table. "I'll write you the names, but this is the last time." </p><p>"Why last time?" She counterattacked, as I was writing down on the paper. I looked up to see her face. </p><p>She looked angrier but still, sad?<i> Somehow. </i></p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"You said you would help me, so why are you pushing me away now?" </p><p>I couldn't speak for a second there. My mind trying to search for the words I hadn't prepared for those questions.</p><p>"We've talked about this Soomi," I finally said. "And you're good to go now. You don't need my help." </p><p>"What about my sexuality?" She puffed up her cheeks, furrowing her eyebrows more making a weird face. "Only you know. You said you'd help me!" </p><p>In lose of words again, I tightly closed my eyes for a second, then opened them. "Oh yeah. Right. I have this counselor friend I've told you about before—" </p><p>"But I need you." </p><p>She shut me off. My breath almost hitching at that point, and it felt like the world had stopped spinning. Did I hear her right? </p><p>"I need your advise before I need some counselor's. Yes, you're my teacher, and you were really friendly and I liked that about you. But now you're acting so strange, Namjoon!" She said it all in one breath. "I don't get you!" </p><p>I bit my lower lip hard, looking away from her face. How could I tell her that me getting involved more with her wasn’t doing anything good. That every time I looked at her face, I remembered my first love, all thanks to Yoongi messing up with my already chaotic brain.</p><p>Even before him, I'd found myself caring for her too much. What if I'd grown an infatuation? </p><p>
  <i>No, I was not smitten by her. I just liked her a little more than the other students. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>But—</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"What are you thinking about?" She snapped her fingers at me. </p><p>"You should go home now. I have to meet someone," I told her, a little strictly but she didn't budge from her seat. </p><p>"When are you going to meet them?" She asked instead. </p><p>"A-afternoon?" </p><p>"It's only morning." She deadpanned. "I'm staying with you until you give a clearcut answer. I think I deserve a clear explanation, Mr. Kim Namjoon." </p><p>My heart skipped a beat hearing her say my full name in such a intimidating way but I shook my head. </p><p>"Who are you meeting?" She asked next.</p><p>"Just someone." </p><p>"Yoongi?" </p><p>"No. It's an old friend," I replied. "I'm meeting them after a very long time so I need to prepare myself. Take a shower and everything." </p><p>"That wouldn't take you till afternoon." She opened a book and kept her solemn eyes on the pages. "So tell me about that girl friend you last told me about. I'm curious." </p><p>"You don't need to know about her," I interjected immediately, making her look up at me. </p><p>"You are meeting her today, aren't you?" </p><p>My heart skipped another beat. </p><p>I stayed quiet. Her eyes slowly became softer, radiating a dreamy glow of the westering sun. </p><p>"Don't meet her if you don't want to." </p><p>"Who told you I don't want to? I'm excited to meet her!" I defended myself but her expression stayed the same. </p><p>"I don't know. I only assumed by looking at you." She grumbled, pulling away her stare from me. "If she was mean to you in the past, you don't have to meet her."</p><p>"She wasn't mean." I could only say that.</p><p>Maybe I really didn't want to meet her. It would only hurt me to see her face again. I'd been running away all this time. </p><p>"Your phone has been ringing for a while." Soomi's voice made me look at my phone sitting on top of the table. I forgot it was there. </p><p>The caller ID said Kim Moonsoo. </p><p>She was calling me. Years had gone by and she was still possibly unaware of my feelings for her. Though, there were times when I'd felt like she was leading me on. That was all in the past where it belonged.</p><p>I hesitantlhy took the phone in my hand, not wanting to pick up the call but, I knew I had to. </p><p>"Is it her?" I heard Soomi's voice say. </p><p>"It is her." She added to my silence next.</p><p>Next thing I knew that my phone wasn't in my hand but in hers. She had snatched it away within seconds. "I know you don't want to pick up her call," she stated, giving me an agitated look. </p><p>"Just give it back Soomi!" I tried to reach for my phone but she took her hand further to the left. </p><p>"You don't unders—" I lifted up my upper body from beside the table to reach for it. </p><p>Bam. </p><p>I fell. Thankfully, I had placed my hands first on the ground so my head didn't hit the floor. I slowly opened one eye, then the other one. </p><p>How could this happen? </p><p>I was on top of her! Soomi was lying right in front of my face, my hands placed by her both sides and only that was keeping my head to crush on her.</p><p>My lower half of the body was still at the other side of the table, making my position as dangerous as it was. </p><p>She kept staring at me with her wide eyes, separeted by a thin slice of air between us. "Don't move." I swallowed hard. If she moved either our head would crush together or my legs which were on the opposite side of the table would slip, getting us both hurt. </p><p>"I won't," she whispered, our eyes still locked with each other. </p><p>Rather than trying to figure out how to get up, I kept staring at her hazel brown eyes, that dreamy glow radiating again. And my mind became blank when it followed the blush on her cheeks, her faint freckles that were invisible from afar, the tiny mole under her nose, and then her lips. <i>Her lips.</i></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Be my friend</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>Somehow this had happened. </p><p>Namjoon was hovering over me, staring at my eyes with his wide ones. Both of his hands by my sides, and his face only inches away. "Don't move," he whispered, his voice raspier than ever. </p><p>I gulped hard like a goldfish, my heart starting to beat faster the immediate second after our contact. I hated how it was making such a loud noise and I prayed he wouldn't hear it. </p><p>"I won't," I mumbled back, my voice almost trembling. </p><p>Namjoon didn't say anything in reply. His breath was fanning my lips, making my heart to almost pull a stunt and jump out of my ribcage any second. </p><p>The distance between us got smaller. He moved his face closer to mine. </p><p>
  <i>Holy mother of Kentucky fried chicken! </i>
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  <i></i>
</p><p>I closed my eyes not knowing what to expect there, or, maybe I knew. I had watched way too many romance movies and shoujo anime to not know. </p><p>But nothing happened.</p><p>I opened my eyes and quickly sat up when I saw him sitting at the other end of the table with a blank expression on. "Go home," he said, his eyes unfocused and fixated on the wall ahead of me. </p><p>"Okay," I barely spoke before quickly getting up and taking my bag with me. "Where will you meet your friend today?" I asked just before leaving. </p><p>"Shinsa-dong cafe," he said in a monotonous voice, still sitting straight, almost like a robot with no expression written on his face.</p><p>***</p><p>Shinsa-dong cafe was just around the very corner of the Omelas library he once introduced me too. At afternoons, I'd sometimes find myself there, skimming through the old and torn books, finding myself at home in those battered desks. Though I hardly ever read. </p><p>Nontheless, I was here today for no reason, or there was one. </p><p>I was only here in case I was needed to kill someone. <i>Specifically her. </i></p>
<p>
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</p><p>I didn't quite know the cafe was right there. Feeling a bit forlorn, and confused I had found myself back at the library to clear my own head and spend some time with my bohemian buddies, which in this case, were books. </p><p>When I realized the cafe right there was the place where Namjoon was probably getting his heart broken, right that very second, I found myself frozen there until the sky had started to darken. </p><p>I always loved girls, girls made my heart feel soft and warm. I just knew girls deserved all the love in this world, but whenever Namjoon's sad expression of him talking about his friend came to my mind, I could feel my blood boiling.</p><p>Maybe not every girl there deserved love. Some clearly didn't know how to appreciate it. </p><p>I almost damaged the can of coke I had in my hand out of anger, but then I quickly regained myself. I took deep breaths and mulled over everything in my brain. With the oversized black sweatshirt, the black baseball cap, and the mask, I almost looked unrecognisable . I did look like a murderer, and a stalker. I knew I had to leave but—</p><p>Whenever Namjoon talked about his friend, his eyes showed the most sorrowful expression I'd ever seen on anyone. Though I only got to see that a few times, it was clear that it hurt him to even reminisce of her. </p><p>I was worried. </p><p>I threw away the empty can of coke to a trash bin that was near me, and when I looked up, I saw a tall figure walking out of the cafe. I could tell it was Namjoon. </p><p>He was wearing a yellow and black striped shirt with a white tee underneath. A pair of rectangular shaped glasses that made him stand out even more in the crowd, however, there was another man and a woman next to him.</p><p>The man had his arm wrapped around the woman's shoulder. The woman seemed to be ranting passionately, and then slapping the other man's shoulder, making him laugh aloud. Could be a lover's act of some sorts, which I clearly didn't get. </p><p>Namjoon seemed a little awkward with them, nevertheless, he smiled brightly and kept their animated conversation going. Soon they bade goodbye and separated their ways. </p><p>I didn't waste another second and ran after Namjoon. It was soon when I had caught up to him. "Namjoon-sshi!" I called out making him turn around.</p><p>He startled as if he saw a ghost, and let out a tiny squeak. I rolled my eyes at him. "I wasn't stalking you, okay?" </p><p>"Why are you here?" He asked with his eyes still wide. </p><p>"Okay maybe I did stalk you." I spat. "But you did that too remember? Because you said you were worried so I got worried too this time!" </p><p>He kept his puzzled eyes at me, as if he was trying to take this all in. I stared back under the streetlight. Lots of people passing us by.</p><p>"Okay, I guess," he murmured in a really low voice then started ahead. Glancing at me from the sides from time to time to check if I was able to keep up with his pace.</p><p>"So...," I trailed off letting out the sigh I was holding in. "What's the story of your friend? The guy beside her, was it her boyfriend?" </p><p>"You saw that too?" He questioned being surprised. </p><p>"I kinda saw that accidentally," I mumbled. </p><p>"He's her husband," Namjoon answered after a second. "SeokJin, we became good friends in college. And she started liking him. They weren't friends and barely knew eachother, so I became a medium and introduced them to eachother. Rest just happened like that." </p><p>"And I kind of worked like a mentor too, you know." He turned to me, smiling proudly. </p><p>"That was it?" I frowned. "It feels like you've skipped a huge part there. Why do you look hurt whenever you mention her?" </p><p>"I look hurt?" He scrunched up his eyebrows, fixing his glasses with his forefinger. "When?" </p><p>"Even now." </p><p>"Oh." He made his mouth form an 'o'. "Maybe because I used to like her, but it's over now." </p><p>
  <i>So he had feelings for her, huh? </i>
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</p><p>"Did your other friend know that?" </p><p>"No!" He denied immediately. "If Jin knew he would've never started dating her! Though I assume he has guessed it by now." </p><p>"Then why did she want to meet you today?" I asked, making him heave a small sigh. </p><p>"They were fighting so she left their place. She wanted to come and spend her time in my house but I'm a single guy, and, we aren't teens anymore. She kept wanting to meet me but I was busy. Then I thought about it and called Jin so they could sort it out together. You can guess that I became a medium again," he said and flashed me a gentle smile. </p><p>"It must've hurt," I muttered in a daze but he didn't say anything else. I realized we were already in our neighbourhood. It was time to part ways. </p><p>"Hey." I found myself holding onto the hem of his sleeve. The striped material soft under my fingers. He turned around and looked at me, then he looked at my hand that was grabbing onto the fabric of his shirt. </p><p>"Can't we be friends?" I said as heat rushed to my cheeks. "Look, I thought about this— in case you say anything else. Since I'm already your student it isn't like I can't be your friend too." </p><p>I sounded almost desperate but I wanted him to understand. "I feel like you are a good friend of mine, so can't we go back to being like before?"</p><p>He just stared into my eyes and I couldn't properly tell what the eyes behind those glasses of his were saying, or what he was feeling about it. </p><p>"Okay," he said, breathing out. </p><p>Suddenly I felt this weight leaving my chest, and couldn't control the stupid grin making its way onto my face. He chuckled too, probably seeing my reaction. </p><p>I'd never felt so happy by making a friend before. I could almost feel my erratic heart screaming and jumping in joy. </p><p>Maybe because he was a special friend.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Holding hands</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I may have a date today." I casually slipped the announcement in, sitting on a chair at Namjoon's office. "At afternoon."</p><p>Namjoon was typing something away in his laptop, he stopped for a second, and then again concentrated on it. Yoongi looked up from his reclining position.</p><p>"May? You either have a date or not, what's 'may'?" </p><p>I shifted, getting ready to elaborate since someone actually showed a bit curiosity. "It's kind of like I asked Hoseok out, also not. He asked me to go to movies with him but I couldn't the other day. So instead, I suggested something else to him. And we are gonna hang out in an amusement park today!" </p><p>"So?" Yoongi pursed his lips. </p><p>"So?? Amusement parks?" I tried to knock some sense into him but his expression didn't change. "In anime, things always happen in an amusement park. Dating or starting to get feelings. Maybe I'll get some feels too." </p><p>Yoongi's face quickly changed into a bitter expression. "Just say that you want to visit an amusement park."</p><p>"Soomi." Namjoon shut his laptop with a loud clank, making us turn to him.</p><p>"Good luck," he said with a serious face. "Now if you want to develop feelings for someone, you've got to know them better. If you find them interesting feelings can sometimes blossom for them. Ask him questions, tell him about yourself too." </p><p>I nodded, mentally noting it all down. Namjoon opened his mouth to talk again. "Also, don't be back too late at night. Be careful."</p><p>I narrowed my eyes at him, and then let out a small huff of breath. "Okay." </p><p>***</p><p>"Wow, we are matching today." Hoseok beamed at me, then twirled around to show me his shirt. </p><p>We were matching, coincidentally of course. We were both wearing white shirts and black jeans. But my shirt was full sleeved and he was wearing a snapback to top off his looks. </p><p>"Yeah." I looked down at myself then looked back at him. "The only difference is you look good, I don't." </p><p>"Oh, come on!" He laughed, casually linking his arms with mine. He was always too friendly. The skin-ship didn't bother me much.</p><p>"Yeah, okay, I'm handsome." I sighed and gave him his ticket. "So, what first? Rollercoasters?" </p><p>A thrill ran down my spine when I thought about the scary rides. I still remembered when I was a kid I'd planned and pulled a prank on the ghosts in the haunted house. A smug look came across my face when I recalled the memory, and also the face of a child version of Jimin, crying— an utter mess with his snots and tears. </p><p>Hoseok jogged a few steps ahead then looked back. "Other rides are more fun. How about the carousel, or the ferryboat?" </p><p>"Hmm." I cocked an eyebrow at him. "Hoseok, don't tell me you're afraid of the scary rides." </p><p>Hoseok laughed but I could see him panicking for a second. "Of course not!" </p><p>"You are scared, Hoseok is scared!" I laughed, and he joined me in it. He was pretty determined in his plan because before I'd known it, I was actually riding the carousel and then a boat on the lake. </p><p>It didn't take me much time to figure out he was terrified of those other rides. I didn't tease him anymore because he was enjoying it way too much. He was running around like a toddler, clicking photos nonstop, telling me to make funny poses for him, and soon, I was tired. </p><p>He out-energied me; I wouldn't care if that's not even a word. </p><p>"This is so fun. I don't think I've enjoyed this much in a long time," Hoseok said in his boisterously loud voice, ice cream in one hand and a balloon in his other.</p><p>I couldn't help but giggle like a stupid thirteen year old trying to impress another boy from the upper class.</p><p>And then I realized, I hadn't done the anime activities I mentally thought I would. Nor did I take Namjoon's advice. This whole ordeal would be futile, except for the fun. </p><p>I looked around a little, the sun was setting, couples scattered around almost every inch of the place. "Should we take a selfie?" I suggested seeing the others taking photos of themselves. </p><p>"Or should we ride the ferries wheel?" I said again as sudden flashbacks of some shoujo anime came across my mind. </p><p>
  <i>That was the ultimate place. The ferries wheel. Couple or not, their hearts would always go doki doki when they would ride a ferries wheel together. </i>
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</p><p>Hoseok wasn't replying so I turned to look at him and he was staring at somewhere else, completely unaware of everything else that existed around him. </p><p>"What is it Hoseok?" I asked, taking a step closer to him.</p><p>"Let's go and watch that. What do you say?" He turned his face to me for a second. He was smiling, his eyes glimmering like a pair of pearls. </p><p>"Of course," I chirped out and we both walked down there. In the midst of the crowd, there was a small podium filled with people in black outfits and big, blaring soundboxes. They were hiphop dancers, and all of them were dancing in synchronization, earning loud cheers from the people watching them. </p><p>"I didn't know amusement parks had shows like this!" I said loudly, clapping with the crowd. When I looked at Hoseok, he was slowly moving his body to the music, his feet tapping the ground, hands clapping the sides of his body with the music.</p><p>"Anyone from the crowd!" The person who was dancing in the front, I assumed he was the main dancer stopped and shouted. "You can come and dance with us!" </p><p>"We have one here!" I shouted back in reply. Without a warning, I pushed a bewildered Hoseok out of the crowd, making him stumble towards the dancers. </p><p>He gave me a surprised look and I could only give him a thumbs up, the music changed in the meantime. </p><p>The crowd was cheering for Hoseok too. However, he was concentrated elsewhere. He was listening to the music carefully. The other dancers had already started dancing and they asked him to join too. </p><p>Suddenly, it seemed as if a jolt of electric shock ran through Hoseok. He moved his body accurately to the beat, hands in the air, feet jumping, making the crowd go pin-dropped silent, but then the next second everyone bursted out hollering. </p><p>I was stunned too. There was this expression on Hoseok's face I'd never seen before. He looked so passionate and <i>different</i> than his usual bubbly self.</p><p>He smiled at the crowd and kept on dancing to the music. My eyes were permanently glued to him. This could be the most amazing thing I'd seen after stranger things.</p><p>The music got more energetic and he started b-boying. Spinning on the floor with his body upside down, then getting up with a jump, again spinning using only one hand, doing a headstand. I'd never seen anything like this before. Even the others had stopped dancing, watching him awed. </p><p>As the music was ending Hoseok got up and bowed. Quickly he came down the stage, his cheeks flashed, sweat pouring down his forehead. He held my arm. "Let's go!" And he started running. </p><p>I hadn't realized how many people joined just to see him. The crowd was too big and loud by the time we were escaping. </p><p>"Oh my god, what was I doing?" Hoseok said to himself when we were far from those people.</p><p>"Bitch, that was the most amazing thing ever I've seen," I yelled out, using all my might. My heart was still racing and the blood cells underneath my skin were boiling from the rush.</p><p>Hoseok stared at me for a second then bursted out into a soft fit of laughter.</p><p>"Really? How come you're so talented and there's people like me!" I exclaimed. "I heard from my other friend Yoongi that Namjoon can rap too. He and you would be good friends!" </p><p>"This Namjoon guy must be amazing." Hoseok cackled, walking by my side. He  looked a little exhausted from all the dancing. "You've talked so much about him that I want to meet him now." </p><p>"I've talked about him before?" I halted in my way.</p><p>"Yeah!" He stretched out his arms. "You said that he has dimples too. And that he would break the boat if he was here because he's too clumsy." </p><p>"I said those?" I was seriously shocked this time. "Today?" </p><p>"Yep, you did." Hoseok smiled at me gently. </p><p>"Hoseok, can I ask you something?" </p><p>I'd missed all that hearbeat-going-crazy romantic feelings today, and it was almost sure to me that I just might not develop those for him, the perfect candidate right before my eyes. It was making me melancholic a little, the fact that I just couldn’t get those feelings for myself when I craved them so much.</p><p>When he nodded, I asked the question I was thinking about. "How do you like someone, romantically? How does it come to you?" </p><p>Hoseok shrugged with his shoulders, his hands in his front pockets. He didn't seem like he thought about it a lot. </p><p>"I don't know. It just comes to me, it doesn't even matter to me what gender they are really. When I start developing feelings for someone in particular I just do." </p><p>That must be nice, I wanted to say but his phone rang.</p><p>***</p><p>I let out a pained groan, plopping myself down on a bench outside a convenience store. I sat with my legs crossed and started massaging my ankle. My house was close from up here but my legs couldn't take it anymore. I had overdone myself having too much fun today with an injured ankle. </p><p>"You okay?" A deep voice snapped me back from my thoughts and when I looked up, Namjoon was looking down at me with a grocery bag in his hand. </p><p>Oh, his place was right around the corner. </p><p>"Yep." I straightened up, putting my feet down. </p><p>"You came back early."</p><p>"Yeah, Hoseok's dance studio suddenly called in emergency." </p><p>"You came back alone?" Namjoon shifted in his stance. "Did you have fun though?" </p><p>"It was fun and he insisted on taking me home, but I don't need a man, I don't need a man," I sang Miss A, making him let out a chuckle. </p><p>"Let's go home then." He held out a hand towards me, taking his bag in the other. "It seems like you've hurt your ankle." </p><p>I looked at his hand and then got up by myself, only to stumble and almost fall losing my balance until he came forward and grabbed my hand in seconds. </p><p>"It's okay." Namjoon assured, his warm hand tightly clasping my small one. "You can hold my hand." </p><p>I wanted to say okay but no words came out. He looked ahead, then looked at me again. "Your house is that way right?" As I nodded, he started walking ahead with me following him, holding onto his hand. </p><p>There was this tingling sensation in my heart, my ears felt hot against the chilly wind at night. For an instance, I forgot about the pain in my ankle, and only focused on his back facing me, and his hand spreading warmth to my body. </p><p>I'd never felt like this before, and, I'd never held onto a friend's hand like this.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Friends don't kiss</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I stood before the front door leading to Namjoon's place. After knocking a few times, I could hear the sounds of shuffling coming from inside. I sincerely hoped he wouldn't break anything on his way to open the door but another thought crossed my mind too.</p><p>If I looked okay. </p><p>Without even realising, I was combing my tangled hair with my fingers and then mentally scoffing at myself,<i> why the heck was I wondering if I looked good or not!</i></p>
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</p><p>The door creaked a little open and a pair of suspicious eyes could be seen. Soon it fully opened revealing the tall, messy man in sweatshirt and pajamas standing in front of me.</p><p>"What are you doing here?" He asked arching his brows. His voice groggy and sounding deeper than the other days.</p><p>His eyes looked more swollen than usual, face too. His hair askew and sticking out to every direction possible. And I couldn't help but think that he literally looked like an egg today.</p><p>"It's afternoon," Namjoon said, holding up his oversized sleeves and rubbing his eyes.</p><p>"Are you sick?" I asked, knowing the answer was obvious. "Your class today was suddenly called off and I wondered why so—"</p><p>I trailed off intentionally. Even though Namjoon looked sick he kind of looked cute too, I guess.</p><p>"Ah, yeah." Namjoon slowly bobbed his head up and down, nodding to himself. "I am down with a cold. I guess it's because of the abrupt changes in the weather. I don't want anyone else to catch it, so you should go home too."</p><p>"I will." I agreed right away. "Before that, how's your cold? Do you need any medicines or."</p><p>"Yoongi is on his way to here, he'll bring the medicine. Go home now Soomi," he said, his voice cracking at the edges due to his cold. He took another step forwards so I wouldn't have the chance to barge inside. </p><p>"Alright, old man, I'm going!" I sneered at him, exasperatedly looking away then sizing him up again. "But did you have anything for lunch? I'll come back in five minutes, keep the door open for me."</p><p>I started running down the staircase, ignoring him calling out my name for further interrogation. Well, I just wanted to bring porridge, that was all.</p><p>It was a nice co incident that my arrogant brother, Jimin was under a cold too. Spring hadn’t still bade goodbye to Winter yet she was already melting into Summer, resulting in the city to have freezing nights and scalding days. Even Taehyung got a fever last week.</p><p>When I reached home, I bolted inside and sprinted towards the dining hall. As I was quickly pouring a portion of the hot porridge my mother had made for Jimin into a bowl, I shouted to the one spending their off-day by lying on the couch of the living room.</p><p>"Mom! I'm taking some porridge for my friend!" I said almost out of breath, this was the fastest I'd ever ran from Namjoon's place.</p><p>Mom peeked her head from the couch, ignoring the afternoon recap of her favourite drama playing on the TV screen. I could see her eyes glimmering from the short distance.</p><p>"Is he handsome?" Her eyes smirked evilly.</p><p>"Really mom?" I stopped wrapping up the bawl with a plastic wrapper for a second, but continued right after.</p><p>Mom let out a small sigh plopping down on the couch again. "Okay then if it's a 'she', is she pretty?"</p><p>"Mom, we can have this talk later." I let out a short puff of breath taking the bowl of porridge and my bag with me.</p><p>Mom hardly ever had holidays like this but it always ended up in that 'talk' but it was alright. If I was my daughter, I'd be worried too if that even made any sense. </p><p>Again, I ran back to Namjoon's place but this time I carefully climbed up the staircase so I wouldn't make a mess. I had only just realized that I could pack the porridge in an air-tight box instead. Then I wondered if there was even any boxes like that in the kitchen. After all, I'd seldom visited if not for searching for something to eat at least ten thousandth times the day.</p><p>The door was open and I entered like a cat. I took small steps and put the bowl down on the table of the living room.</p><p>Relief washed over me as I was done. But where was he? The place seemed unusually empty to me. So empty and silenced that I was hesitant to call out his name loudly.</p><p>I knew I shouldn't have been a peeping tom but I was curious, and the door leading to his whole place, the other rooms, and his bedroom were staring at me goggly eyed. I needed to find Namjoon and tell him to lock the front door to the least. </p><p>I couldn't help myself. Next thing I knew, I had taken a few more steps to a wooden door that was slightly ajar, as if it was telling me to open the Pandora's box.</p><p>And I did. I only creaked it half open and as I had presumed, it was Namjoon's bedroom. He was sleeping in this massive bed of his, preoccupied with books, a laptop and some sheets of paper. Only a little space was cleaned for him to sleep.</p><p>The whole room was empty other than that. Few cardboard boxes lying here and there. Since he was only here for a month, I guessed he probably didn't feel it necessary to unpack everything.</p><p>"Um, Namjoon. Can you close your front door?" I said, almost in a whisper. "I got you some porridge and..."</p><p>He didn't even shift. Which made me wonder if he was alive.</p><p>I hesitantly went inside the room. "D-did you die or hey.."</p><p>As I was mumbling, I had already sauntered close enough to him to see that he was soundly asleep, clutching tightly onto his soft blanket. Everything was white, his pillow, bedsheets, blanket, like it was some fairytale and he was the sleeping beauty.</p><p>"Hey," I called out, but nothing.</p><p>From what it looked like, he had been surely working hard and couldn't get enough sleep. Even his bed was a mess. So I thought maybe, I could stall for a few more minutes then wake him up.</p><p>I crouched down on the floor facing him. His face was close to mine, and I had a magic marker in my bag and I also had an unexplainable urge to pull a prank.</p><p>I had done this to Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung a millionth time, though I didn't know if it was appropriate to pull it on Namjoon. Then I remembered, he had agreed to make a truce and be my friend.</p><p>I cautiously fished out the pen from my bag and leaned forward, so close that I could feel his breath fanning my nose.</p><p>With the tip of the pen almost touching the skin over his lips, I stopped. It felt like this had happened before. With his face next to mine and this heat spreading onto my cheeks. Then I realized, it was from the time when he had accidentally tripped on me.</p><p>When he was staring at me with his dark eyes wide, merely inches gap between us. I'd recalled that event, pictured it exactly as it was many times again without no reason, and every time my face and my ears heated up as if I was having a fever, and it was happening again.</p><p>I could feel my skin going red each second, my breath coming out haphazard. This was no exercise, I was just sitting there in front of him. Yet I felt like I just had a 100 yards marathon. I didn’t know why that was happening.  </p><p>My hand was still raised, gripping onto the pen. The black, thick ink almost reaching out to his canvas of a skin but I couldn't do it. Instead I kept on staring at him blankly, almost forgetting how to breath at this point.</p><p>
  <i>He had really full lips unlike mine.</i>
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</p><p>I retreated my pen back, and instead my bent more towards him. I could already feel his feverish skin, my own one burning against his.</p><p>But it only had happened for a second. I moved away as soon as I had realized, this was wrong. </p><p>I was just about to kiss him. And not on drunken intention this time. </p><p>I rushed away from his room like a thunderstorm, leaving the front door open, only to be bumped against a body right outside, and that someone was Yoongi.</p><p>"Hey!" He growled as my body hit his. I murmured a quick apology before running away.</p><p>I just hoped he didn't see my face, red like a ripe tomato.</p>
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<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Remember</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey." I couldn't help but feel my heart exploding like firecrackers inside my chest as I greeted Namjoon. </p><p>
  <i>Please God, don't make him remember what happened yesterday. </i>
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</p><p>"Hey Soomi." Namjoon looked up through his glasses. "Wow, you look— did you catch a cold?" </p><p>"Yeah. My brother is sick too," I answered with bile rising in my throat, making it hard to talk to him. "The virus probably descended from there." </p><p>I let out a laugh, that came out awkward and dry like a piece of cheap biscuit. </p><p>"Why don't you take a leave today? You really don't look well," Namjoon retorted with pure concern lacing his voice. "I, on the other hand, recovered miraculously in a day." </p><p>He gave me a bright smile that made dimples appear on the sides of his lips.</p><p>
  <i>His lips. </i>
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</p><p>"Probably thanks to Yoongi and the sleep. I had a good sleep after ages, and then Yoongi brought in the medicines. I feel quite refreshed today," Namjoon beamed with pure joy. He really looked like a teacher today. </p><p>He was wearing a white cardigan on top, and a full-sleeved formal shirt underneath, his hair was neatly combed to the side and he had his thick rimmed glasses on. He looked exuberant and healthy, his cheeks were tinted in a lively pink.</p><p>More students entered the class from the back but I stood there, not taking my seat. He hadn't mentioned one thing about me, why. </p><p>"You know Namjoon, yesterday I—," Trailing off the sentence, I stared him down, waiting for him to finish it. </p><p>Namjoon looked confused for a second, then he gave me a bright smile as he rearranged the books on his table. "The porridge was really good. Did your mom make it?" </p><p>As it was in my DNA I rolled my eyes instinctively. "Yeah. I can't cook for my life so you're right." </p><p>"I kind of guessed that." Namjoon let out a silent chuckle. "Say thanks to Mrs Park on my behalf. I enjoyed it." </p><p>"Okay," I replied, still standing there to see if he had anything else to say. </p><p>"Do you want to say something else to me?" Namjoon looked up again after a few seconds. "The class will start now though." </p><p>Turning my head to the room, I realized it was already filled with the students. Even Jungkook was there, staring intensely at us from the back seat as if he wanted to join in the conversation. </p><p>Without another word, I went and took my seat. He really didn't remember anything.</p><p>"Good morning, everyone. Today we'll talk about some works of Robert frost. Anyone read any of his poetries before?" Namjoon asked in his deep voice, standing in the middle of the class. </p><p>I had. Robert Frost was one of my favourite poets but I kept quiet. And the lecture went on. </p><p>I should have felt relieved, thankful to dear God, that Namjoon didn't remember me almost kissing him. There was barely a centimeter of thin air between us. Of course, how would he? He was deep in a repose. </p><p>Did I want to make a remake of sleeping beauty? Else why the hell did I want to do that, I wasn't even drunk. Could this be, what they called, sexual attraction? </p><p>He hadn't felt any of the pain or restriction, that's why, he could sleep soundly and wake up refreshed when I couldn't sleep a wink last night and woke up with the stupid cold. </p><p>This couldn't be happening. I wouldn't be in peace for the rest of my life because of that, because of wanting to touch someone, kiss someone when I'd never felt that attraction towards anyone before, and he'd live his life in luxury not knowing about it.<i> Good. </i></p>
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</p><p>But there was this glint of anger starting to rampage through my brain, spreading like the ebola virus, and I didn't even know why. A part of me wanted him to remember and that part was freaking my own self out.</p><p>"I want you guys to read this collection, and pick out a writing you liked, then I want you to come up with the reasons behind you liking it, and write them down in a short essay. That concludes today's lecture." </p><p>A breath of relief could be heard among the students as the class ended. I only snapped back from my thoughts and looked around, not having a single clue of what had gone on today. </p><p>"Yo, wanna hang out somewhere before heading home?" I saw Jungkook walking up to my seat with a baby grin on his face. "You broke my bicycle remember? Buy me a good lunch today and I'll call it even." </p><p>"Not now, Jungkook," I mumbled picking up my backpack and dashing out of the classroom, ignoring the boy and leaving him behind. </p><p>It was soon when I had found myself in Namjoon's office. I was out of breath, the ebola imitating virus had completely attacked my whole brain, tackled down every other nerve that was telling me otherwise, to leave the God forbidden urge to kiss him, to forget it as whole. </p><p>"You're here?" Namjoon looked up and quirked up an eyebrow. "You... closed the door?" </p><p>He was right, I had closed the door and now I was taking deep yet short breaths like I was a bull ready for fight and Namjoon was the red piece of cloth wriggling in the air in front of me. </p><p>"Soomi?" Namjoon raised his tone, panicking a little. I could tell. </p><p>"Do you really not remember anything?" I huffed, looking deep into his eyes through those glasses of his. </p><p>Namjoon stared at me confused. "L-like what?" </p><p>"Good. You don't remember." I puffed out the breath I was holding. Turning on my heel, I put a hand on the closed door. </p><p>
  <i>Leave Soomi, leave before things get out of hand. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>But...</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>Here, the virus goes again. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I turned around to face Namjoon again. He had gotten up from his seat halfway but he fell on the chair again as I stormed to his desk and put my fists on it loudly leaning forward. </p><p>Namjoon was now in utter confusion, not being able to apprehend what was happening here or what to do. He was in between my arms that I had planted on his desk. When I leaned forward he had frozen in his spot as there was close to no distance between us. He was sitting on the chair, I was peering down to his eyes from the other side of the desk. </p><p>Making it impossible for him hide or run. He was trapped and my inner predator ran lose. </p><p>
  <i>Don't do it Soomi. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>No, tell him. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>Don't. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"I almost kissed you yesterday." I whispered with our eyes locked. "I wanted to and I was there, sitting in front of you for so many god damn seconds."</p><p>His eyes were shining with a glint of nervousness, but soon they became wide. He didn't break off contact with me. I could feel the tension between us rising until he opened his mouth to speak. </p><p>"I thought it was a dream..."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. It wasn’t a mistake</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I thought it was a dream..."</p><p>Namjoon muttered under his breath and I couldn't fathom what he was saying for a second until the realization hit me like a truck.</p><p>I couldn't breathe. It felt like time had just stopped right then and there. <i>Did he just say that?</i></p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i>He thought he saw me kissing him in his dream?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>Namjoon jutted his head back, pushing his chair backward in the meantime, and hurriedly got up as he was free from my grasp now.</p><p>"I, ah, need to go," he mumbled looking away. It wasn't a second until he dashed off the office leaving me behind, bewildered like that.</p><p>Shit.</p><p>***</p><p>How would I face him tomorrow?</p><p>That was all I could think the whole day, locking myself in my room and practically leaving the outer world.</p><p>Today was one of the most awkward days of my life and it was my fault. Everything was my fault from the beginning.</p><p>Scoffing at myself, I picked up my phone that was lying on my bed helplessly as it hadn't been checked the whole day. After opening it, I was greeted by a few texts from the genius man, Yoongi.</p><p><b>Infiresman: </b>you free at 8 tonight?</p><p><b>Infiresman: </b>come to yeonhye dong street</p><p><b>Infiresman: </b>you don't believe me so see namjoon rapping with your own eyes</p><p>My eyes went wide, excitement rushing through my veins, but that went away soon when I had realized it was already past eight and the messages were received three hours ago.</p><p>
  <i>Even if I left now how would I face Namjoon, talk to him after what had happened? </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I had always wanted to see underground rappers, and witnessing Namjoon like that? It's not like I hadn't believed Yoongi before though, damn, I wished so much I could see it with my own eyes.</p><p>I looked at the clock hanging on the bedside wall again.</p><p>
  <i>And, this is why they say curiosity killed the cat.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>It was only five minutes later when I was running on the street to the bus station and no one was here to stop me. My brother wasn't at home, mom was at work and my brain cells were only telling me to do one thing. Run.</p><p>So I did. I took the last bus for the night that left me on the predestined street. I then texted Yoongi again as I walked around the deserted neighborhood.</p><p>There was hardly anyone here. Buildings, and the apartment places looked shabby and old. The roads were rusty but I was enjoying the night walk. I was too excited not to enjoy.</p><p>I was good at finding places since it didn't take me much time to find where Yoongi and his gang were situated, but, unlike what I had thought, there were only three people sitting on different bikes near an old pub. They seemed to have an animated conversation going on.</p><p>From afar I could tell it was Yoongi, his mint colored hair would give it away within miles.</p><p>I quickly approached them with a grin on my face, exhausted a little for all the running around. "You're late hun, the show's over." Yoongi rolled his eyes dramatically as soon as he saw me.</p><p>"Hey!" The other guy beside him waved his hand at me cheerfully.</p><p>He looked familiar but I couldn't remember his name. However, I was stopped in this little brainstorming to recognize him when the third guy, the guy that had his back facing me turned around.</p><p>It was Namjoon.</p><p>And, he was sitting on top of a monstrous bike. Wearing a black leather jacket that said RM in the back, tight jeans, and a black shirt that had two buttons undone, exposing his masculine chest and collarbone. His hair was styled with gel, giving this wet look, and falling on his forehead, earrings in his ears and this mischievous look on his face.</p><p>It took me only a second to size him up, top to bottom. I couldn't believe what I was seeing.</p><p>I saw his face losing color, losing that oh-so-enigmatic expression he was wearing. Soon he looked as pale as a piece of paper.</p><p>"What is she doing here!" He said with his mouth agape. I couldn't be wrong about his voice.</p><p>This was Namjoon!</p><p>"Hi, I'm Jackson." The guy that looked familiar butted in. And then I remembered my first meeting with Namjoon, he was there.</p><p>That thought too, vanished soon, since my brain was occupied with something else right now. That was Namjoon, the tall nerdy guy who's my teacher, standing right in front of me dressed up like the baddest thug, and I couldn't help but think,</p><p>
  <i>He looked handsome as fuck!</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>He looked like those villainous anime guys I would develop a crush on every time, and now this got me thinking if I was actually high, or, if I was dreaming.</p><p>"Have I seen you somewhere? You—" Jackson tried to speak again but was cut off by Yoongi.</p><p>"What's going on between you two?" He asked a little surprised, seeing Namjoon and me staring at each other. "I told her to come," he added.</p><p>Namjoon turned away. "Now take her home."</p><p>He said that to Yoongi but I was the one replying, "Why would I go home!"</p><p>"Because this isn't a safe place," Namjoon stated, his voice lacing with agitation. We shared a glance before he looked away again.</p><p>"Well, I came here on my own according so I can leave by myself too." I scoffed crossing my arms over my chest.</p><p>"Well, the last bus for the night is gone and you wouldn't find a taxi in this area." I heard Namjoon vent out.</p><p>"Namjoon, you can give her a ride." Yoongi sighed. "You basically live in the same neighbourhood."</p><p>"Me? In this bike?" Namjoon raised his tone. "Neve—"</p><p>"Yes!" I shouted before he could finish. "Yes, yes, yes, god damn! I've always wanted to ride a bike!"</p><p>"No." Namjoon shot me a glare. </p><p>Jackson let out a chuckle observing our little banter. "Why don't you just give her a ride Namjoon? She seems excited."</p><p>"Yep!" I took the extra black helmet Yoongi was holding out to me. Without Namjoon's consent, I hopped on the motorbike of his, looking all pumped up and ready to go.</p><p>
  <i>I couldn't see the underground rapping stuff today but, hell, at least I could enjoy this.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>But Namjoon didn't sit. He kept on glaring at Yoongi, trying to convey something using his eyes which the smaller one clearly couldn't get. "What?" Yoongi snapped.</p><p>"I'm her teacher. I shouldn't be here in the first place, let alone giving her a ride on my motorbike!" Namjoon yelled at him.</p><p>"Correction, a sub teacher." Jackson retorted.</p><p>"Shut up Jackson!" Namjoon said. I'd never seen him so annoyed, losing all his composure. "Whatever. I'm done with this."</p><p>He then hopped on the bike before me and I realized how close he was, and I almost recoiled. Namjoon started up the engine while wearing his own white helmet.</p><p>"Well, you sure seemed excited to be here today, now I don't get why you're being rude," Yoongi grumbled from the back, followed by Jackson's teasing remark. "Something's definitely going on between them."</p><p>"Hold on to me." Namjoon didn't give them a reply and told me.</p><p>Hold where? I looked at his broad back, practically brushing my front side of the body. I should go for his shoulders.</p><p>It wasn't a second after that, I was grabbing onto his back for my dear life when the bike roared and rushed forward. The suddenness of it caught me so off guard that I was holding onto him tightly. A minute later, I opened my eyes.</p><p>"Don't worry. I'm going on a low speed," Namjoon said in a softer tone this time.</p><p>My breathing was heavy and out of sync. It took a while to get adjusted, and then I realized, I was still hugging him like a koala bear from the back. What the hell! I hastily let go and gingerly placed my hands on his shoulder.</p><p>My heart suddenly started acting up, the firecrackers inside my chest popping again like the other day. My face heated up. I was embarrassed, yet, so exhilarated at the same time.</p><p>I tried to focus on the bike ride instead and I could feel the adrenaline rush through my veins. Each of my blood cells trembling to the electric pull. Even when I closed my eyes I could feel the strong wind hitting my face, the night streets of Seoul I was passing by. </p><p>Even with that, something was still happening in my chest and stomach. That was his presence. Rather than the bike ride, his presence had a bigger impact on me.</p><p>"What cologne do you use?" I shouted against the wind.</p><p>"What?" Namjoon yelled back. Only then I realized what kind of stupid question I had just asked.</p><p>Damn, did he smell nice. Not the axe stench every other boy in my vicinity carried around. The aroma was strong, but not overlapping. It was probably for his cologne that my brain felt dizzy, as if I was ecstatic.</p><p>"Where did you hide this bike? It's amazing!"</p><p>Namjoon was silent for a second. "It was in the basement. I don't use it much."</p><p>"Hell, you should. I'd take this baby out every day if it was mine!" I exclaimed by myself and I could feel Namjoon shaking a little. Was he laughing?</p><p>Thank God. The awkward atmosphere between us was finally dissolving.</p><p>He didn't say anything else, albeit. I thought of asking something again but before that, he stopped beside a lone street, at least 10 minutes away from my place.</p><p>"You can walk from here." Namjoon looked back, taking off his helmet. His stare was piercing, and stubborn, but I didn't let it get to me.</p><p>"Why! It's only—"</p><p>"You can walk," Namjoon stated. His voice so demanding that I had to get off and give my helmet back to him.</p><p>"I'm a teacher and you're my student. We can't be seen like this," he added as he quickly wore his helmet, starting up the engine again to leave.</p><p>"Wait." Instinctively, my hand reached out and grabbed onto the sleeve of his jacket. "Namjoon."</p><p>He turned to me, took off his helmet again. His expression hardened. "It's Mr. Kim."</p><p>That one sentence left me with a stinging pain starting to spread across my chest, but I still couldn't let go off his jacket. He stared at me for a while, then spoke.</p><p>"What you did yesterday, you shouldn't have done that. At first, it was a drunken act and I could dismiss that. Now you're really giving me hints, and implying things. And maybe it's a prank to you. You know, I could talk to the authority about you making deliberate moves on me.</p><p>He paused for a second then started talking again. "But I wouldn't. It was my fault. I should've kept the distance. I should've acted like a real teacher, it is my dream to be one in future. And I failed in my very first task."</p><p>"It wasn't a prank," I murmured. My voice so low I could barely hear myself. Though he seemed to have heard at it, as his eyes became wide. He regained his calm posture soon.</p><p>"Then it was a mistake."</p><p>"It wasn't!"</p><p>I too had wondered if it was. But, under the starry sky, and the street lamps showering us a with soft light where I could see him perfectly, and after everything that had happened today, it suddenly hit me, that my feelings for him wasn’t a mistake. I really was attracted to him. Physically, and I think, mentally too.</p><p>That was a huge deal for me. Because in my 20 years of life, I had never before felt that pull.</p><p>"It wasn't a mistake," I said with my voice louder this time. And I waited for him to say something but he didn't.</p><p>He looked too lost to say anything. A thought crossed my mind out of the blue, and it was too strong to shrug off. I gulped down the bile that was rising in my throat and walked forward.</p><p>I went close to him and cupped his cheeks with my both hands. He was staring at my eyes as if he couldn't fathom what was happening. </p><p>I waited a second, but he didn't move. His muscle relaxed slowly. He knew what was about to happen.</p><p>There was no hesitation this time. I leaned in and closed the gap between us. Leaving him wide eyed and shocked, I put my lips on his and kissed him as I meant it.</p><p>Only a second later, I pulled away. My face clearly flushed, and his eyes still bulging up to his forehead.</p><p>But then he got up from the motorbike and took a step closer to me. It happened in mere seconds.</p><p>"Don't blame me for what's going to happen next." His deep voice muttered.</p><p>And he pulled me closer to him. One hand in my wrist, the other cupping my cheek. This time, he kissed me.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Kissing isn't the first step</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>I closed my eyes and kissed her. </p><p>It was so sudden. I had no control over my emotions or my actions, but whatever was happening, I'd never felt like this before. </p><p>As I put my lips on hers, my hand on her cheek and her skin burning against my palm. She kissed me back, her other hand reaching for the side of my head and she grabbed the back of my neck. I just kind of lost it there. </p><p>I pulled her closer, using both of my hands I held her small waist tightly against mine and almost lifted her up the ground. I felt like I could actually devour her and I've never wanted something or, someone so bad. </p><p>And the kiss I gave her could say it. I'd never told her how much of an effect she had on me, but if she could decipher this touch she'd definitely understand how much I wanted her, wanted this to happen.</p><p>
  <i>Even if it was wrong. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I let go off her only when my lungs desperately needed air, even though it was so hard to pull myself away from her. I was still holding her in my arms and we both were catching our breaths. Her whole face was red, eyes glittery, and she couldn't look at me straight. And I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. </p><p>After that, things happened. They weren't really noticeable to me because I was still hung up on the kiss, and she was too probably. </p><p>I gave her the spare helmet back and drove her all the way back to home. She left without saying goodbye, almost ran out of my sight when I dropped her off to her house's door. The whole way too we were both silent. </p><p>This was wrong, so wrong in every possible way. </p><p>
  <i>But why did it feel so right? </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I was her teacher. I knew we shouldn't had; I shouldn't had done this. </p><p>Even though, those thoughts kept crossing my mind, I couldn't feel any amount of regret for what I'd done earlier. Every thought of mine kept contradicting each other, leaving me in a state of carelessness. And I didn't know how to feel about this anymore.</p><p>***</p><p>"Now that you've seen your marks for the tutorial, you know that only a few of you have actually tried hard. Majority had me disappointed." I let out a small sigh putting my hands on the table, leaning forward. "So there will be another test in the next class, on the same syllabus. I want you to take it seriously this time." </p><p>A frustrated, angry groan came from the crowd before me. After the lecture, the students looked too defeated to run off excited like the other days. </p><p>Not too long ago, I was somewhere sitting in that crowd. Now I had this podium all to myself. I was on the pedestal and I had the power. I thought I wasn’t going to be strict because I hated teachers like that. But now I could understand where they were coming from.</p><p>"Best of luck to you all," I said as I eyed each and every student leaving through the front and back door.</p><p>
  <i>Where was she?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>Letting out yet another exhausted exhale of the carbon dioxide, I started fixing up my tie, loosening it up. Almost all the students were gone, and then finally I saw her, sneakily leaving through the back door!</p><p>"Soomi!" I quickly walked up to her putting the books down. I knew she had heard me since I saw her speed fasten. </p><p>
  <i>Well, who's the one running away now? You can't hide from me. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"Park Soomi!" I called out her name loudly, catching up to her and taking a walk by her side. She did her best to out-speed me by walking faster but sadly, it was a waste of energy on her case.</p><p>"Hey," she finally muttered, giving a quick glance my way. </p><p>"Why are we running?" I asked, laughing a little as I'd realized we were practically sprinting in the empty hallway. </p><p>"Okay." She stopped on her track all of a sudden, then faced me with that ever grimacing look of her. "What do you want?"</p><p>That look never failed to amuse me. "Nothing." I exhaled. "You did good in the exam. You've improved a lot so congratulations on getting a good mark." </p><p>"Yeah…, thank you," she said with her voice low. "That's all you wanted to say?" </p><p>"Yes, and also another thing, why were you running away?" I asked, trying hard not to sound teasing. </p><p>She fiddled with her bangs covering her forehead, looking down so her face could hardly be seen. "Nothing. I just look shitty, that's all. My eyes are puffy for not sleeping properly for two nights." </p><p>"You look fine to me." </p><p>I commented and she looked up, her face flustered and her cheeks tinted with pink. <i>Gosh, don't do this to me!</i></p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"Stop joking!" She frowned, the pink in her cheeks becoming beet red. </p><p>"I am not." I licked my dried lips before saying. That kind of expression, shy, and needy, and flabbergasted like a deer caught in the headlights, I had never seen it on her before. It had me feeling weak to my knees, and almost out of breath. </p><p>She was breath-taking. I had realized that way before but didn't have the courage to admit it myself, say it out loud in my head. </p><p>She spared me a judging glance from head to toe, then faced away with her brows knitted and cheeks a little puffed. "I thought you'd be the one ignoring me today." </p><p>I would, if that was the me from one week ago. But now? I wouldn't be able to do that, even if I tried, and I just knew it in my bones that whichever way I'd take, it would always lead me right back to her. I was too deep in this, and I was way too into her. </p><p>I shifted in my position, a smile making its way on my face. "Kissing isn't the first step you know." </p><p>That look again. Though, now she was more flustered and startled as if she couldn't believe that just came from my mouth. However, she didn't say anything, more like she couldn't. </p><p>I looked at my wristwatch, time to go through the assignments that were left piling up on the desk of my office. For the first time, I wasn't excited to check those papers. Being with her was all I wanted. </p><p>"There's an off day tomorrow, right?" I pursed my lips at her. "Come by my place early in the morning. Will see you then." </p><p>After that, I turned the other way and started ahead. My grin becoming wide and sly. However, I was stopped in the way when I heard her voice from the back. </p><p>"Why?" She shouted still standing in that place. </p><p>"For lessons," I shouted back, facing her direction for a mere second. "Lessons of the proper steps you need to take before kissing someone!" </p><p>I left before she could ask me another question, though, I doubted if she could, even if I stayed. <i>Well, kitty, stay alert because you need to learn a lot from me.</i></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Get to know each other</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>
  <b></b>
</p><p>"So, why are we here again?" I frowned at Namjoon who was stretching his arms out and yawning. Then I looked at what laid before us, the vast sky and a fragment of the city from above. </p><p>We were at Namjoon's place, but on the rooftop. Even though it was quite small in space, there were herbs and flower pots everywhere, and even an old, battered couch left to a side, big enough for three people to sit. </p><p>"Your lesson." Namjoon looked at me.</p><p>"Are we here to exercise?" I frowned again, not understanding what he was referring to. </p><p>I definitely didn't come here at seven freaking AM for a morning exercise.</p><p>"Let's sit down first." Namjoon cackled. His brown hair was messy again today, glasses sitting on top of his nose, giving him this nerdy look like always. </p><p>
  <i>It's illegal to look cute like this! And then there's me, I'd look like an old hag If I wore those thick rimmed glasses. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"It's... refreshing." A long sigh escaped my mouth as I took a seat near him on the couch. </p><p>"The morning, right? I often come here to see the sunrise!" He beamed excitedly. </p><p>
  <i>I was talking about you, but okay. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"The landlord has a nice taste." Namjoon smiled at me then looked ahead, breathing in the fresh air. </p><p>
  <i>God, I could actually dive in those dimples and get lost.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>"Whenever I get stressed I just come here, have a cup of coffee by myself, and I read something. It feels really good." He propped an elbow on his lap and rested his chin on his palm as he observed the landscape of the city outlined down below. </p><p>"Is this some kind of a secret hideout? Like you've never told this to anyone before?" I said excitedly, trying to hide my grin. </p><p>Namjoon turned his face towards me, his cheek resting on his hand. "Kind of, yeah. You know something Soomi?" </p><p>He breathed out, a lopsided smile spreading across the side of his face. "You don't normally kiss someone before you properly get to know them. That's your first lesson." </p><p>A blush made its way on my face as soon as he said that. "I— I know you!" I almost yelled out of embarrassment. "But— not really." </p><p>Coming to think of it, I'd never asked more questions about his personal life. I didn't even know his birthday, his interests in music, we could forget his zodiac but I'd be curious to learn that too, also if he liked mozzarella sticks or not, because that would be important. I really knew close to nothing. </p><p>"Yeah." Namjoon faced ahead. "That's why, let's get to know each other better. Get out of just the teacher student label." </p><p>He wanted to know more about me, apart from being his student, and I couldn't help but blush to myself. What was this? I never thought I'd blush so much over a guy ever in my life.</p><p>"You do know a lot about me," I piped in. "I mean, I talk all the time and you listen. But I don't know much about you." </p><p>"You can ask me any question you want," he said almost immediately. Just a terse eye contact with him and my heart skipped a beat again. </p><p>
  <i>Wow, what was this feeling?</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I cleared my throat looking away. "So.., what's expensive girl?" </p><p>"What?" Namjoon shouted, eyes pouring out of his socket. "Who told you about that!"</p><p>"Yoongi. In your place, remember? Later I asked him what it meant because I was so curious. He said it's kinda like a taboo? And you guys don't talk about it?"</p><p>Namjoon let out a huff of relief. "Don't ask me about that again, you don't wanna know." </p><p>"Okay." I gave a small nod. "Then what's trouble?" </p><p>"WHAT?" Namjoon shouted louder this time, almost damaging my eardrums. </p><p>"Well, Yoongi said it's a song you and your friend Jin composed?" </p><p>"When have you and Yoongi been talking about my dark past behind my back?" Namjoon furrowed his eyebrows at me. </p><p>I gulped a little. "I sent him a few texts asking some stuff about you, I was curious that's it." </p><p>"What else did he say?" Namjoon interrogated with a serious expression, making me swallow harder. </p><p>"Nothing else. That was it," I lied in a blink. </p><p>I had asked Yoongi if Namjoon had a girlfriend before and Yoongi told me who'd date Namjoon because he'd probably break the bed doing stuff; I flushed red again. </p><p>"If you're curious you can ask me. Don't need to ask the grandpa." Namjoon pouted a little by himself. </p><p>
  <i>Cute. </i>
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</p><p>"Grandpa? Wait, he does act like one." We both laughed at my sudden realization, and then I sat properly straightening my back, as if I was preparing to interview him. </p><p>"Do you write songs? You seem like you love music. Did you want to be a musician when you were small?" I asked a little seriously, which made him chuckle. </p><p>"Yeah, kinda. I do write music, and I love rapping. I was an underground rapper back in high school, and the early years of college but being a teacher always meant something else to me, possibly more." </p><p>"Can you please rap in front of me someday? Or sing me yours songs? Please?" I pleaded with my eyes. "Rappers are so cool! I wish I could rap but I always go asdfghjkl whenever I try!" </p><p>Namjoon stared at me wide eyed. "Ah, I— I don't know." </p><p>"Please! You have to." I put a hand on his free arm resting on his knees. I gave it a light squeeze. </p><p>"A-alright." He stared at my hand on his arm. His ears looking unusually red, why? </p><p>"You have to though, don't forget your promise." I let go off him, feeling incredibly happy inside. Rappers were always the coolest bunch to me. And I always died on the rappers in any of the kpop group I liked.</p><p>"So, how's it like being a teacher? You once said you wanted to be a full fledged teacher someday." I chirped but he was staring blankly ahead.</p><p>"Oh, um yeah." He snapped back to reality after a second. "I really want to be a teacher. That's why it's important to me being a good sub teacher here. They are gonna give me a letter of recognition which will look good on my CV. It'll work as an experience too. I can probably be a real teacher in some college if I do good here." </p><p>"Oh." I nodded, my mind slowly drifting away to what he'd said before. </p><p>That he failed as a teacher, because I tried to kiss him. And that he should've maintained the line between us. </p><p>He really wanted to be a good teacher, but I made him think otherwise. </p><p>"That was short. You're done with your questions already?" He asked, making me wake up from my reverie. </p><p>"No. What other things do you like?" I asked. In my mind I was still wondering if what we; I was doing here was right. Suddenly I couldn't help but mull over that. </p><p>"Traveling, music, movies, books, a lot of things, apparently!" He looked at me. "And you?" </p><p>"Well I don't know about books much but I love reading manga." </p><p>"Such as?" He asked eagerly, making my mind have a short blackout again. I turned my face away. </p><p>"Boys love. I love bl manga." </p><p>I heard Namjoon softly chuckling by my side. "I never would've thought. How are they?" </p><p>"Well, I don't know. I actually thought I wouldn't like them too. But it's kinda addicting. I mean once you're in, you can't get out. Just even the thought of two hot guys- hey why are you laughing at me!" </p><p>"I'm sorry." Namjoon clasped his hands over his mouth, his eyes crinkled for laughing too hard. "I'm not making fun of you, I promise." </p><p>"Hmm." I vehemently folded my arms over my chest. "Well, yaoi isn't the only thing! I read shoujo too, okay? I mean those girly romance stuff, bet you wouldn't have guessed that too."</p><p>"Really?" He asked a little surprised. "You do?" </p><p>"Yeah. There's this even one manga that reminded me a lot of us. It's called faster than a kiss." I chimed excitedly at him. "There's this teacher and a student-" </p><p>My tongue halted as soon as I'd realized what I was talking about. Oh no, oh no. Embarrassing! </p><p>"What? I'm curious." Namjoon gave me a cheeky smile. </p><p>"Nothing!" I snarled. "Theyweremarriedbutwearenteveninarelationship." </p><p>I said it fast under a second, then a took a deep breath in. "I mean what I'm saying is, we have nothing in common with that manga, absolutely nothing!" </p><p>Namjoon bursted out laughing after a silent second when I was done. "And you said you couldn't rap. That was so fast, I can't even—" </p><p>He was losing it. Tears started forming in my eyes. Hell, I was embarrassed. More embarrassed than the the time Jungkook caught me sending a girl love letters when we were kids. </p><p>"You look cute when you're embarrassed," Namjoon said all of a sudden, still grinning hard. </p><p>That was it. My heart did a back flip, my consciousness flying off to the heaven. "Stop it!" I cried putting on my grumpiest face. </p><p>At this point I had realized that I couldn't care if this was right or wrong. I just wanted to be with him, as a student, and as something else too. Something more than just a student. </p><p>Namjoon was still laughing to himself a little, biting on the side of his lower lip for him to stop. "Are you hungry? We should get some breakfast now." </p><p>"Yeah," I said in a daze, thoughts clouding my mind. </p><p>"Let's go then. What do you wanna eat?" He got up from his seat, asking. </p><p>"Will you go on a date with me?" I blurted out, completely out of context. Not even knowing what I was really saying. </p><p>"After knowing each other doesn't dating come as a thing?" I asked with my voice trembling this time. Finally, it was hitting my nerve system, what I was actually doing. </p><p>I was asking him out. Which I might regret later. But this was me, a stupid, sexually conflicted, and confused girl who always did stuff before thinking. </p><p>"I don't know." Namjoon uttered, blankly staring at me as if he couldn't get a hold of what was happening. "Let's.. talk about that later."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Date me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Why wouldn't you date me!" </p><p>That's the first thing I said, more like screamed after I had blasted through the door to Namjoon's office and recreated my oh-so-heroic pose, which was putting my hands over his desk with a loud thud, and trapping him in between my arms while shooting him my deadly stare. </p><p>"You can't just leave me hanging like that," I growled at the wide-eyed one before me. "Look at me! I couldn't sleep! Nor could I concentrate in any of my classes today!" </p><p>Couldn't he understand how much it was paining me? After going all the way to asking him out and he completely brushed it off?</p><p>"So you guys really have something going on." A raspy voice came from the side. </p><p>I was surprised to find out the voice's owner, Yoongi sitting right there, all this time. I was so caught up in my actions I hadn't realized he was there.</p><p>Yoongi gave me a sharp look then glanced back at Namjoon. "I was just asking him. You guys did seem fishy to me." </p><p>With that, he got up. I was calmer now and stood steadily unlike before, but my mind still processing what was happening. </p><p>"Let me answer for him, which I think is the right answer." Yoongi again shared a glance with Namjoon then stared at me, his hands shoved inside his jacket's pockets.</p><p>"He probably wouldn't date you because his time here is ending and he'd go back to Ilsan soon." Yoongi breathed out. "Now I'll see myself out. You guys talk." </p><p>It was soon when he had left. There were thousands of questions flying through my mind already. Namjoon really was going to leave? </p><p>I kind of knew it. I saw this coming. </p><p>"When?" I turned to Namjoon and asked, swallowing the lump that was rising in my throat. "When are you going to leave?" </p><p>"Soomi, I would've told you this today." Namjoon rolled his lower lip inside his mouth. I couldn't decipher his facial expression but he looked, sad? </p><p>"I know," I muttered under my breath, loud enough for him to hear. "I didn't think you'd leave Seoul. I thought you'd just leave this college when professor Cha comes back." </p><p>"Ilsan is my hometown, I moved here temporarily." Namjoon stood up from his seat and approached me. "I'd have to leave at the end of this week, or next week, after professor's arrival is confirmed." </p><p>"Okay." My voice sounded dry and off as I acknowledged. </p><p>
  <i>I'm not going to cry. I never cry in front of someone. </i>
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</p><p>"So what?" I slowly crossed my arms over my chest, cocking an eyebrow in the meantime. He looked surprised. </p><p>"That doesn't mean we can't go on a date. You're still teaching me remember?" I said blatantly. "Since we don't have much time left let's do it today." </p><p>"Wait, Soomi—" </p><p>"You're done here, right? Meet me at four pm, near that library you once took me to." </p><p>"But—" </p><p>"Stop." I showed him my hand, almost shoving it to his face. "Today's date is on my hands. I know close to nothing but you can count on me." </p><p>I said it as fast as I could before I flee from his sight. Four pm, which meant I had only three hours in my hands with a lot to prepare. </p><p>Thankfully, I bumped into Hyemi while running down the hallway. "Hyemi!" I screamed waving my hands at her. She was the one I was looking for. </p><p>Since I; we didn't have much time, I was going to make this memorable for him.  </p><p>***</p><p>"Make me pretty," I demanded at first  but then my tone got softer as I pleaded. "Please!" </p><p>Hyemi's eyes were up to her forehead, mouth slightly apart. "B-but you're already pretty." </p><p>"More like handsome." I rolled my eyes at myself. "I want to go on a date looking pretty, like a normal person on a normal date. For only today. I just want to surprise him." </p><p>Saying all that, made me feel embarrassed for some reason.</p><p>"Date?" Hyemi scrunched up her perfectly shaped eyebrows. "Who?" </p><p>"I—" I trailed off, realizing I couldn't say Namjoon's name. He was still a teacher here, after all. </p><p>Hyemi looked surprised, shocked to say precisely. "It's okay." She looked down and shook her head slightly to the sides. "I just didn't know—" </p><p>"Actually, me too!" I shouted before she could finish. "I didn't know I'd end up dating him, and it's my very first date with him too. And, and, he might go away soon." My tone got lower by my last sentence. Hyemi stared at me for a second before she held my hand. </p><p>"Let's get you a dress first. Want to go to my place? It'll be easier that way." </p><p>My face lit up hearing her suggestion. "Thank you, Hyemi!" I lightly squeezed her hands giving her my widest smile. </p><p>"Oh, and also," I added. "We have approximately two hours now." </p><p>"Dear God!" Hyemi quickly got up, panic written on her face. "Let's hurry!" </p><p>She took me by my arm, marching off and pulling me with her. The girl I thought was shy at first actually had a rebellious side in her. That reminded me of someone, her brother, Hoseok.</p><p>"Hyemi," I called her name out, she didn't stop but let out a sound from deep within her throat. I took that as an agreement that she was listening to me.</p><p>"You know, Hoseok and I had a lot of fun. We hung out together and it was an amazing experience for me."</p><p>"Yeah, I know. He told me. I was jealous, to be honest," she said with a soft giggle, her back still facing me.</p><p>"I can't help but think that I..." I hesitated, my pace going slower without intention. "Do you think I may have led him on? That me going on a date with someone now might make Hoseok sad? Then I should apologise to him."</p><p>"What?" She finally faced me, her eyes on mine. "He'll be okay," she assured. "To me, my brother and you look like you could be good friends."</p><p>"You think so?" I could feel my confusion over him melting away as she nodded.</p><p>"It's me who might feel a little sad about this." </p><p>She had a solemn look on her face for a second, before she brightened up like the sun in a gorgeous morning. "Let's get going now!" she cheered, again dragging me with her.</p><p>I couldn't possibly make up my mind if that was a joke on her part or not.</p><p>
  <b>KIM NAMJOON'S POV</b>
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</p><p>"Late," I mumbled by myself, taking a glance at my wristwatch. </p><p>She was never late but it was already four fifteen ans she was nowhere to be seen. It made me wonder if I had actually heard her right. </p><p>To be honest, I wasn't prepared for a date. I didn't even know how to. My mind just couldn't seem to process that she had asked me out, that this could really happen.</p><p>If I told her sooner I wonder if any of this would happen. This whole ordeal of going out on a date together now seemed futile since we'd have to part anyways, and she might not even remember me. </p><p>
  <i>But I'd never be able to forget her. </i>
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</p><p>"Hey." I heard a voice that snapped me back from my thoughts. Turning my face to the side, I saw a petite girl smiling at me. </p><p>I turned my face forward again. It must have been a mistake, I didn't know her. </p><p>"Namjoon-shi?" The voice sounded shy, that girl was trying to talk to me. </p><p><i>Must be a student.</i> I tried to look at her carefully this time. </p><p>My eyes went wide, brain stopped processing for a second, my jaw was probably rolling on the floor. In the meantime, my heart did at least ten summersaults. </p><p>Was this one of my dreams of her, but hey,<i> I never had these kind of fetishes. </i></p><p>
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</p><p>It couldn't be, Park Soomi was standing in front of me wearing a dress!</p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. New to this</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
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  <b>PARK SOOMI'S POV</b>
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</p><p>"What?" I asked, panic rising in my voice. "Do I look weird?" </p><p>I was wearing a pastel brown romper skirt that rested just above my knees, a white turtleneck tee underneath. This was the only outfit a bit similar to a dress that I could find in my wardrobe and pull through.</p><p>My mom bought the romper skirt for me on my eighteenth birthday but this was my first time wearing it. I put on a light touch of makeup, done by the expert Hyemi. And now I was feeling really stupid. </p><p>Judging by Namjoon's expression, his eyes pouring out of his sockets and mouth agape, I could tell that I looked strange and peculiar to him. </p><p>"No, it's just that—" He quickly looked away fixing his glasses. "It must've been your first time wearing a dress." </p><p>He then let out a cackle that sounded dry and nervous. Since he was a gentleman he probably was suppresing himself to say I looked ugly on my face. </p><p>I touched the small earring on my left ear as a small sigh escaped my mouth. I could feel the excitement leaving my body, but I didn't let it get to me. </p><p>"Let's go then." I smiled at him. "I wanna visit the aquarium today."</p><p>***</p><p>"I really thought it would be an amusement park." Namjoon shared a glance at me then looked ahead. </p><p>His hands shoved inside his pants pockets. He was clad in a light colored shirt, first few buttons undone and a black t-shirt could be seen from underneath. Really simple and typical look like every other day yet he looked like the star of this place, most handsome of them all. <i>Or was it just me?</i></p>
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  <i>What was wrong with me, really? </i>
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</p><p>"I thought visiting an aquarium would be fun. You're not liking it?" </p><p>"No! I'm impressed," he told me and quickly looked away again. This had been going on for a while. </p><p>
  <i>Did I look that ugly! </i>
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</p><p>"Oh look, seals!" Namjoon gushed excitedly, quickly marching towards the glass bars with seals inside in the water and playing by themselves. </p><p>"They're so cute!" He gave his biggest smile showing his teeth. His dimples so deep I could pour ramen in them and eat-<i> wow I'm so weird.</i></p>
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</p><p>"Yes, they are cute." I laughed and played along. </p><p>
  <i>You are cuter. </i>
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</p><p>"Ahjussi, you're blocking my vieew." A voice spoke in a high tone, almost like a chipmunk it sounded. </p><p>We looked back to where it was coming from, and found a tiny boy, no more than four years old, standing there sucking on his lolipop, his big doe eyes staring up at us. </p><p>"Oh, sorry!" Namjoon apologized and moved away. The small boy took little steps and stood by me. A whimper left his mouth. </p><p>"I can't see anyway." His little voice sounded disappointed. His height was a big disadvantage yet he kept himself up on his toes, his neck pulled up in the hopes to see the seals.</p><p>He tried a few jumps but he was too small to look over the three feet tall wall under the glass material. </p><p>"Can I help you?" Namjoon crouched down to the boy's level and said. Before that, he flashed me a smile.</p><p>I did that back. Our eyes telling each other that we both found the small boy adorable. </p><p>With the boy's nod, Namjoon lifted him up in his arms and placed him close to his chest where the boy could see the seals perfectly. The small one's eyes lit up and the lolipop fell from his mouth. </p><p>"Amazing!" He gasped staring at the artificial pond. </p><p>"What's your name?" I asked the boy being curious. </p><p>He looked at me with those doe eyes. "Baekhyun." He then turned his face to Namjoon. "Ahjussi, is that your girlfwiend?" </p><p>The little boy had a small lisp with his pronunciation of the letter r. I found it lovely and was still squealing inwardly when I found Namjoon glancing between the boy and me, and stuttering to himself. "I... Um—" </p><p>"Yes, I'm his girlfriend," I said with a smile and the boy smiled back with his tiny teeth.</p><p>"Ahjussi, your girlfwiend is pwetty!" </p><p>The boy was squirming in Namjoon's arms. Namjoon him put down. He then said, "yes, she is." </p><p>Just then a woman with short hair ran to us. "Baekhyun! How many times have I-" </p><p>Abruptly she stopped when she saw us and took slower steps towards us. "Thank you for taking care of him. He's always causing trouble for people." </p><p>"I ain't!" The boy went over to his mom, frowning. Though his mom glared at him in reply. </p><p>"It's no problem. He's adorable!" I commented, Baekhyun's mom lifted him in her arms. </p><p>"Thank you so much. You guys are such a nice couple!" She looked at our faces, smiling brightly. "Say bye to them Baekhyun." </p><p>"Bye bye!" The small boy waved both of his hands. And he kept on doing so until he was out of our sight. </p><p>
  <i>He thought I was Namjoon's girlfriend. </i>
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  <i>And his mom thought we were a couple. </i>
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  <i>And she said we were a nice one on top of that. </i>
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  <i>And, even Namjoon played along! </i>
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</p><p>My cheeks felt hot as my brain did a quick recap of what had just happened. </p><p>I looked at Namjoon who was staring ahead like he was deep in his thoughts. He turned to me and slowly reality came over to him. "Do you want to get ice cream or eat something?" </p><p>"No," I denied immediately. Why wasn't he bringing up what just happened there? "At least Baekhyun said I looked pretty. Hoseok said that too." I blurted out. </p><p>"Hoseok?" </p><p>"Yeah." I rolled my eyes at him. "Hyemi did my makeup. I was at their place." </p><p>"Oh." He bit his lower lip looking away. "You look pretty." </p><p>His last line came as a whisper and I could barely hear it. "What?" </p><p>"I said you look pretty!" He let out a small shout, making everyone at that side of the aquarium turn their heads to us. Namjoon looked as if he wanted to dig a hole right there and bury himself in it. </p><p>"You look beautiful," he said with his voice lower this time.</p><p>"It's just that, you looked so different and it kind of surprised me. So I couldnt-" He looked flustered all of a sudden. Turning away, he put a hand over his mouth and started walking ahead. </p><p>"You always look pretty to me. So, you don't need to change yourself, or change your attires for me," he said with his back facing me, his voice a little muffled with the hand still clamped over his mouth.</p><p>
  <i>Hold his hand, do it now. </i>
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</p><p>I didn't know what came over to me, but I caught up to him and held his left hand. I then intertwined my fingers with his. Namjoon looked more surprised than before. </p><p>But he didn't say anything, nor did I. We stayed quiet and walked side by side with our hands locked. </p><p>My heart was hammering against my chest, and for some reasons I felt really happy, yet, I wanted to cry my eyes out. Probably because I was too overwhelmed. </p><p>I was new to this, new to this feeling. It felt like I could hold onto his hand forever and never let him go. </p><p>***</p><p>But I had to let him go. </p><p>It was already past eight and we were standing outside my house. Thanks lord, it was dark since the porch light wasn't working, else he could see how sad and disappointed I was that the day had already come to an end. </p><p>Namjoon heaved a small sigh. "Go inside. We'll see each other tomorrow." </p><p>I really wanted to cry but I cleared my throat. "No, you go first." </p><p>"My place is just five minutes from here." He chuckled softly.</p><p>"Yeah, but I want to see you go!" I almost yelled at him, trying to hide my emotional state. "Yes, I'm stupid now go!" </p><p>"Alright." He whispered but didn't go. Not that I wanted him to. </p><p>However, after a silent second he came closer to where I was standing and I froze in my spot. Was he going to kiss me? </p><p>I wouldn't lie, secretly I wanted that to happen, right then. </p><p>But he went up and hugged me. </p><p>This was different. I didn't know what to do for a second but then I wrapped my arms around him. His embrace was warm, and I didn't know why, but I felt like his hug was trying to tell me something. </p><p>My head was pressed against his chest and I could hear how loudly his heart was beating. That only meant I wasn't the only one. </p><p>And I wanted to cry, I was overwhelmed again. I kept asking myself in my mind, what was this. What was this feeling? </p><p>Namjoon let go off me gently. "Goodnight," he mumbled before leaving. </p><p>I wished this day never ended. I wanted his hug to last forever. </p><p>Heaving a sigh, I ran a hand through the roots of my hair and turned towards the door. As I took a few steps in the porch, I saw a dark figure slowly rising as if the person was sitting there.</p><p>"S-soomi is that you?! And was that-" </p><p>A familiar voice shouted. </p><p>"Jungkook?"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Do I like him?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"How much did you see or hear?" I let out a short exhale of breath, plopping down on the couch next to Jungkook. </p><p>Jungkook was staring ahead with his big doe eyes even wider. Hugging onto a cushion for his dear life. He was <i>Jungshook</i> to be exact. </p><p>Slowly he turned his face towards mine, mouth agape. His doe eyes scanned me from head to toe. "Why the hell did you get changed!" He shrieked out loud. </p><p>I looked at myself as I'd changed into my casual outfit, a loose hobo-like trouser and my favourite black oversized hoodie right after I had entered the house. </p><p>"What? I looked stupid." I growled making his eyes go wider if that was even possible. </p><p>"I hate to say this Soomi." He chimed. "But for the first time you looked like a human to me, not a potato." </p><p>"You bitch!" I tried to slap him on the shoulder but he dodged it away skillfully. </p><p>The reason I wasn't panicking with Jungkook catching me with Namjoon was because I'd always found the former trustworthy for some reasons. He was the only one of my age, and we did stick through thin and thick all these years, from before we were properly potty trained. </p><p>If it was anyone else, I might had to kill them or make some kind of accident happen so they would get amnesia and forget it. </p><p>"So, how much?" I pursed my lips. He breathed out. </p><p>"All of it," he answered. "There was no one here when I came by, around the evening, so I decided to wait it out until Jimin or you would come back. But then I saw this, a couple, and I never thought it would be you until you came up to the porch. Though I just knew the guy was Mr Kim and thought I had some juicy gossips in my hands now—" </p><p>"You know you're dead if you tell anyone at school right?" </p><p>"Yeah." He bobbed his head up and down. "Since it's you I'd let this go but—" </p><p>He turned his whole body around and sat on the couch with his legs up, so he could properly face me. "So, you guys are dating?" </p><p>"Nope," I answered without an ounce of hesitance which made him furrow his eyebrows. </p><p>"You guys looked like, nevermind; then do you like him?" </p><p>"N-" </p><p>I stopped, not being able to finish it. That was the real question, if I liked Namjoon or not. </p><p>Because I'd never liked anyone in my life. Even a week ago I was asking myself if I was immune to the romantic feeling or not. </p><p>But with Namjoon, this couldn't be a spar of the moment. Or just like <i>like. </i></p>
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</p><p>Then did I like him that way? That word felt too heavy for me to swallow. I didn't know for what reason. Probably because I'd wondered all my life about it, spent most of my years pondering over the idea of romance. And I'd known Namjoon only for a month. Why did I start getting attracted to him in such a short period of time? </p><p>Jungkook snapped his fingers at me. "Yo?" </p><p>"Yeah?" I came back from my daze.</p><p>"You don't wanna answer?" Jungkook scrunched up his face, then he puffed his cheeks with air. "Well, don't!" </p><p>"God, I don't wanna talk about it." I shifted in my seat in discomfort. "Things sorta just happened and escalated from there. I'm glad that you saw us instead of some other student." </p><p>"Hmm." Jungkook slowly let out the air from his cheeks. "Imagine photos of you with him being spread everywhere and every student sees and-" </p><p>"And then they ban Namjoon, and he leaves, and I cry, and then we meet again after five years when I've graduated." My tone only dwindled downwards progressively with each word. "Literally happens in every teacher-student manga and stories." </p><p>"You even read those?" Jungkook exclaimed. "No wonder! So you've had this fetish for a long time!" </p><p>"I read everything." I shot him a glare. "Man, you know that I read those romance mangas." </p><p>"I do," Jungkook said. "Anyway, isn't Mr Kim gonna leave soon? He's only here as a sub for professor Cha." </p><p>
  <i>Yeah, he'll leave soon. </i>
</p>
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</p><p>"Oh my god?" Jungkook gasped after a second. "You're crying!" </p><p>I flinched for the loudness of his voice, my ears bleeding internally. "I don't cry, bitch," I said in a monotonous tone. Though I did feel a bit depressed, not a bit, perhaps a lot. </p><p>"Okay, so is he gonna go far away?" Jungkook kept staring at my face with a petrified look on his. "The face you're giving me right now is actually scaring me." </p><p>"He'll move back to his hometown." Yet another long sigh escaped from the pit of my lungs. </p><p>"So you're just gonna let him go?" </p><p>"Of course not!" I grumbled under my breath. "I just— I don't know if he'd like keep his contact with me." </p><p>Next second I felt a hand on top of my head, gently starting to stroke my hair. My eyes went wide as I stared at Jungkook, <i>was he actually doing this! </i></p>
<p>
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</p><p>"It's gonna be alright," he mumbled softly. Looking a little awkward as he probably didn't know what to do. "It's gonna be okay." </p><p>"Thank you Jungkook," I muttered as he kept on caressing my head, more like patting it as if I was his lost pet of some sorts. </p><p>"You know you can cry if you want?" He said. "We've been friends since kindergarten so this wouldn't be my first time. Remember that one time you accidentally stepped on dog's shit and started cryi-" </p><p>"Don't be so full of yourself!" I slapped his hand away. "I don't have any kind of memories like that." </p><p>"Really? I remember how much you cried because you ruined your brand new converses and were jealous of mine? Wait, I think my mom even has a photo." He smirked playfully. </p><p>"This is your last day on earth!" I screamed before jumping him with my cushion. It was soon when we were both in a cushion fight, hitting each other mercilessly. </p><p>Actually I did remember that. I also remembered my mom, and even Jimin, and Taehyung shipping us together. Because Jungkook's mom had told my mom that the boy had a crush on me when we were kids. </p><p>
  <i>And look at us now. They thought we'd get lovey dovey by this age we are now. </i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>"Hey, stop, stop!" Jungkook halted all of a sudden. "It's valentines day the day after tomorrow! What are you gonna get Mr Kim, hah?" He remarked in a teasing tone. </p><p>"What?" I shouted. I had totally forgotten about that.</p><p>"Gosh, I don't have time for your stupidity," I added before getting up and taking my phone to leave. I would need Hyemi's help again with baking because I had never done that in my life. </p><p>Also, I was gonna ask Namjoon about expensive girl because I just couldn't get that out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. I. Needed. To. Know.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Like him or not</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Happy..." I trailed off, seeing Namjoon so concentrated and still busy in his work. I had been waiting but it seemed like his countless amount of chores were nowhere near their ending.</p><p>"Yeah, Soomi?" He said, not looking up and arranging his files. Hundreds of paper sheets scattered all across his table.</p><p>"Nothing." </p><p><i>Happy valentines day. </i>Instead I said it in my mind. </p><p>"Oh, it's valentines day today!" He said by himself as if he had just recalled it. </p><p>"Yeah. I got a lot of chocolate." I pulled down the zipper of my backpack and showed him what was inside. Namjoon peered over a little from the other side of the table.</p><p>"Wow," h mumbled, eyes going wide. "They were from the girls?" </p><p>"Of course." With a smug look on my face I boasted. "Though I don't know if I'll win against Taehyung. He might get more again this year. What about you?" </p><p>"I got some too." He scratched on the top of his head. </p><p>
  <i>Who in the world would give their teacher a chocolate. </i>
</p>
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</p><p>Namjoon's hands went under the table as he pulled out a basket. A very large basket filled with all kinds of chocolates and letters. </p><p>
  <i>I forgot he was a handsome and a young teacher. </i>
</p>
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</p><p>"I don't know who put them here. All the cards and letters are anonymous." Namjoon sighed, shoving the basket to a side. "That's why I locked the door to my office." </p><p>Here I had thought he locked it for privacy, just so we could talk freely without people butting in.</p><p>"Hmm." A scowl appeared on my face involuntarily. "I lost to you. You got more chocolate than me." </p><p>"Really?" Namjoon grinned biting on his lower lip.<i> Damn sexy.</i></p>
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</p><p>"I'm a little disappointed to be honest. I thought you'd give me chocolates too." Saying that he went back to work. Though I could say from his tone that he was rather joking. </p><p>I had something for him, and it was right inside my backpack. I couldn't help but hesitate, since the other stuff he recieved were way better than mine.</p><p>"Are you busy the whole day today?" I smoothly avoided the topic and asked. </p><p>"Just taking care of everything since I'd have to go back soon." With a small puff of breath he got up, and went towards the other side of the room where some cardboard boxes were placed on the floor.</p><p>"I'm preparing ahead. Don't know when professor Cha comes back so...," He pressed his lips thin, showing me a closed mouthed smile. </p><p>"Let me help you." I got up. He protested. </p><p>"It's okay." He smiled again and my heart sank there. <i>He was okay leaving too.</i></p>
<p>
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</p><p>"Namjoon-sshi," I called out to him. My voice so soft that it surprised my own self, probably him too, because he stopped in the middle of his work. </p><p>"I um—" I averted my gaze, that nervous feeling starting to kick back in. </p><p>"So, we don't have eachother's numbers, and now you're going back." I gulped down the lump rising in my throat. "I thought we could maybe exchange numbers and I could contact you sometimes." </p><p>This was definitely a first. Never in my life I had asked for someone's contact. Texting, and calling, keeping in touch wasn't my niche. </p><p>"Really?" Namjoon shouted making me look at him and he was really surprised, the happy kind of surprise to be exact. </p><p>"You want to stay in contact with me? I thought you wouldn't! I was gonna give you my number anyway before I leave," he rambled on with this radiant smile on his face. </p><p>"What are you talking about? Why wouldn't I?" I scoffed. </p><p>After holding hands, and kissing, more than once, or twice if I really thought about it, and even after going on a date he thought he could leave and we'd both just separately live our lives?</p><p>
  <i>How could he think that?</i>
</p>
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</p><p>"Namjoon-sshi." I crossed my arms over my chest, leaning my back against his table. </p><p>"You can call me just Namjoon now." He smiled as he kept on filling those boxes with those papers. </p><p>
  <i>Really?</i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>He was giving me the honour to call him not only by his first name, but also call out to him informally, despite me being his student. Though the anger wasn't going down even in that case. </p><p>"You know, I'm kind of hurt. After all that happened you thought I wouldn't want to stay in contact with you." </p><p>Again Namjoon halted in his work and turned to meet my eyes. My infiriated face probably got him a little since he looked like he didn't know what to say for a second. </p><p>"Soomi I—, I thought you weren't serious about us?" He finally said, ending his statement with a question. </p><p>This time I couldn't even hide the look of getting hurt. "You, this was my first time and you know it. First time kissing someone, going on a real date with. Okay I get that you are our teacher BUT SOMETIMES YOU'RE JUST TOO CLUELESS." </p><p>Namjoon quietly endured me bawling at him with his mouth slightly parted. He licked his lower lip, and gave it a mull over before he started talking again. </p><p>"I thought you said you were asexual and probably aromantic too, I mean, at least you said that you possibly were. Everything that happened after was too surreal to me. I didn't come here to end up being in—. A-and who would want to have a serious relationship with me anyway? Plus we know each other only for a month. Other than that, Soomi, do you like me?" </p><p>He rambled on so fast with such a blank expression on, I had to debate if he was actually rapping or not. And it took me a while to take in what he had just said. </p><p>
  <i>He was asking if I liked him or not.</i>
</p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>Not giving him an answer, I pulled myself up on top of his desk and sat there with my arms still crossed over my chest. </p><p>"I'll answer that when you come back to Seoul next time. You'll come to visit here, right? Or are you gonna disappear after leaving this college?" </p><p>Namjoon looked a little disappointed, seeing me not answering his question. He bit on his lips hard not to show that but the disappointment was prominent on his face. </p><p>"Yeah, I'll visit. I'll definitely come here." </p><p>"That's good then." I exhaled, taking my backpack and pulling out a small box from it. Gathering all my courage, I looked at him. </p><p>"Happy valentines day, Namjoon." </p><p>And his mouth was yet again open as if his jaw would drop on the floor. He blinked hard staring at the box that was held out to him. "You made chocolates for me?" </p><p>"These are muffins but yeah." </p><p>After hundreds of ugly and burnt attempts, only those came out a little decent, still they were too sweet for my taste. I was aiming for making the bitter ones. Thank god even after all that failure Hyemi didn't give up on me. </p><p>"Wow," he mumbled approaching me, taking the box from my hands. </p><p>"They are a little too sweet. Sorry." I breathed out. "They might not taste as good." </p><p>"You don't even know how precious these are to me." He was grinning by himself, opening the box like it was filled with treasure. Again those dimples, and that innocent smile. </p><p>
  <i>Why don't you just kill me already? </i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>"That was cringy," I said, making him cackle. </p><p>He took a piece and bit on the side. I was holding my breath, clutching onto the sides of the desk.<i> Please don't throw up!</i></p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
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</p><p>Instead his grin got brighter. "It's really sweet but good job! Since I've been so busy, and low on sugar, these would actually help." </p><p>As he was attempting to take another bite, I snatched it away from him, the whole box too. "Eat them later, and slowly. You'll get diabetics. You don't know how much sugar I accidentally put in the dough." </p><p>I could sense my face slowly becoming red as I was saying those. But he disrespectfully put his finger over his lips and licked on it.</p><p>"Hey this is actually quite good. Give it to me!" </p><p>He put his hands by my sides hastily, leaning in to get the box that I had behind my back but I pushed it further away using my hands. </p><p>"You just can't but make me struggle, can you?" His eyes were frowning, and demanding as he looked at me. </p><p>Then I realized how close we were. His face merely an inch away, his breath fanning my lips. Since I was on top of his desk we were on the same eye level. </p><p>His eyes were locked with mine and as if it came as a reflex I grabbed onto his tie, pulling him a little more closer with only a thin gap of air separating us. And he closed his eyes. </p><p>I froze there. So close to kissing him, but I had stopped. It made his eyes flutter open, and he looked puzzled. </p><p>"What?" He whispered, his head rolling to the side a little. </p><p>"It's just that I always kiss you first. You're never the one to start it." The words escaped my mouth and I wasn't even fully aware of it. </p><p>It was true. It was as if I was one of the dominating, passive-aggressive male characters from all those romance mangas and fanfics I had read. I was always the first one to initiate it.</p><p>"So you want me to kiss you first?" </p><p>
  <i>Was he actually smirking? </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>I couldn't confirm if it was really a smirk or not, before that, he had closed the gap between us and crashed his lips on mine. My mind went blank with that. </p><p>But just a second after that, my thoughts ran wild and I kissed him back. My hands reached for the back of his neck, loosely hanging there as our lips worked rhythmically. Causing thousands of fireworks happening inside my chest and butterflies fluttering inside my stomach. </p><p>
  <i>The muffins I made for him were really too sweet. </i>
</p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>He let go huffing out a breath and I did the same, still holding onto him. And I was right, he was smirking and it was still there.</p><p>"So, babygirl." He suddenly whispered it in his American accented English, sending shivers down my spine. "You gave chocolates to only me and no other guys right?"</p><p>"Yeah!" I answered, blushing beet red, but then I remembered. "Hoseok had tasted some of it." </p><p>"What?" He asked, clearly a little annoyed. </p><p>I'd never seen this side of him before. First calling me a babygirl like an f-boy, and then scowling by himself.</p><p>"Because Hyemi taught me how to make those and I was at her place the whole day. Hoseok was there too and he—" I couldn't help but stutter under his stare. </p><p>"You don't have a clue do you?" He whispered. Again shivers went down my spine. His deep voice and his tone had something in it. </p><p>"D-dont go all fifty shades of grey with me!" My stupid mouth blurted out. </p><p>He looked at me shell-shocked for a second, then bursted out laughing. Though he got a hold of himself soon. </p><p>"You have yet to see a lot of sides of me." He said eyeing my lips. </p><p>He then held my waist and moved his body closer, in between my legs he stood. Tilting his head to the side he kissed me again. </p><p>This one was different. I'd never experienced anything like this before. </p><p>It wasn't gentle this time but quite rough yet, seductive. His lips skillfully worked against mine and I didn't know what to do this time, instead my legs gave out and I held on tightly to him. I couldn't even breath but that was not the problem, the problem was that I was almost fainting due to the ecstasy. </p><p>His hands roamed around my waist to my thighs. Though I had jeans on I could actually feel the hit of his skin as he pulled me closer to him. It was almost like a magnet, how captivating he was. And then another thing happened. </p><p>I could feel his tongue going inside my mouth and he was sucking on my lower lip. </p><p>That was it, <i>I was surely fainting.</i></p>
<p>
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</p><p>He pulled away from me before that could happen. And thst left us a breathing mess. My lungs needed air, I couldn't speak properly, yet I yelled on top of exhausted lungs. </p><p>"What! was! that!" </p><p>"What? You didn't like it?" He said between his pants. </p><p>It would be a lie if I only said I liked it, because I loved it. I enjoyed way too much and this was shocking to me.</p><p>His eyes scanned my flushed face then they went to my lips. "Dang, I want to kiss you again," he said to himself.</p><p>"Namjoon!" I called his name in a breathy voice, as his face was close to mine yet again. </p><p>He moved his head back and looked at me with surprised eyes. "That was… sexy." </p><p>"Shut up!" I shouted before pulling him in a kiss again. I ought to actually lose a count of our kisses with this tango of our lips going on.</p><p>I was happy. I was more than happy. And it was not even a question anymore if I liked him or not. I just wanted to be with him, as much as my life could offer me. </p><p>"Hey, I'm curious." I pulled back a little. "You have to tell me about expensive girl." </p><p>He smirked closing the gap again and murmured against my skin. "Yeah, when you answer to my question. If you like me or not." </p><p>
  <i>This sneaky little! </i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>On the other hand, I had to admit that I never liked valentines day. But this day was probably the best day of my life. </p><p>As I was endorsed here, I didn't know what was waiting for me at home.</p><p>That was the reason why I'd always been afraid to be too happy because whenever I was, eventually it came crashing down at the end of the day.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Annoying brother strikes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The day had come to an end. I was returning back home with a smile on my face, a really stupid expression on, grinning too hard even though my cheeks hurt. </p><p>The thought that I could spend more time with him again tomorrow as I didn't have any lecture scheduled was not helping too.</p><p>I pulled out my phone from my pocket. Now I had Namjoon's contact number saved, and just that had me squealing internally like a stupid freak. However, opening my phone I was surprised seeing a text from Jungkook, but it seemed quiet unusual, coming from him. </p><p>It only said "I'm sorry." </p><p><i>If this was some kind of prank I swear I could kick him where he'd see stars circling around his head for at least three days,</i> thinking that I flung the door open leading to my house and strode inside. </p><p>"Soomi." Jimin's voice made me stop. Turning my head towards the side, I saw him sitting on the couch with Jungkook by his side. "You're here." He got up. </p><p>There was something unusual going on here. At first look, everything seemed alright but judging closely I could see the air thick with a foreboding solemnity, and a sense of fragility, as if the invisible walls in the room would crack and burst open any time. And oh their expressions, their god damn expressions, crestfallen, and somber. </p><p>Jungkook was sweating and it wasn't because of the balmy weather. I'd seen him looking severely intimidated before but this was something else. On the other hand, Jimin face was hard, his jaw clenching, his demeanor reminded me of the time Jungkook and I had stolen his new pair of underwear and set it on fire as a prank. </p><p>
  <i>But what did I do this time? </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i></i>
</p><p>
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</p><p>"What?" I asked under Jimin's intense glare. This was starting to scare me.</p><p>"I'll get straight to the point." He inhaled, his nostrils flaring in anger. "Are you dating your professor?" </p><p>"Hyung," Jungkook whispered from the side, his voice trembling. Jimin shot him a glare and Jungkook had to avert his gaze. </p><p>"What are you talking about?" I gave a quick response, my eyes travelling from Jungkook's face to Jimin's. Suddenly I was feeling terrified inside, for real.</p><p>"I'm asking again," Jimin said through his gritted teeth. I could see how angry he was, real demon-like angry, and I'd never seen him like this before. "Are you dating your professor, or not?" </p><p>"He's not a professor." I blurted out, vehemently. "He's only here as a sub, and, no! I'm not dating him!" </p><p>
  <i>Jungkook told him everything. </i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>
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</p><p>"I know. Yeah, he's a substitute, he's just filling in, still he's a teacher. He's a god damn teacher in your college and this is illegal!" Jimin shouted, with each word his voice only got louder. </p><p>Even though we were siblings and grew up together I'd never seen him so out of himself. I could see him shaking for how he was losing it. </p><p>"He's only five years older than me!" I yelled back since I had realized there was no point lying to him. In the meantime, I glanced at Jungkook who couldn't even look at me. And I wondered why he did that, why he ratted me out. </p><p>"For fucks sake, Soomi do you think I don't know everything? He was here only for a month and now he's moving back to his hometown soon." Jimin hissed under his breath.</p><p>"Hey, I didn't tell you that!" Jungkook protested from the side with his eyes wide in shock. </p><p>"You shut up kookie! I have my connections." Jimin couldn't but get angrier. Then he turned to me, his look fiercer and tongue sharper. He really knew everything. </p><p>"This substitute teacher guy, God knows what he has been doing to you! Even a child could weigh the pros and cons and think this guy would not be worth going for. I don't care how deprived you feel sexually and romantically, but he's not it!" Jimin pointed at me, his cadence reached higher and reverberated on the ceiling. </p><p>"Please Soomi I'm your brother and we are only a year apart. I thought you had grown up by now! You're not a teenager anymore! I don't even want to make my mouth dirty but do you know what these types of guys do? They can do things to you and move away, vanish just like that and you'd never know." </p><p>
  <i>What did he mean by 'do things' to me. </i>
</p>
<p>
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</p><p>Namjoon would never do anything Jimin was implying to. Not in a million years. He would not hurt me, and he knew the worth of consent more than anyone. It was me who even made the first moves.</p><p>"Why the hell do you care?" I brawled. "Don't make assumptions! I'm not even dating him so fuck off!" </p><p>"If you're not dating him why the hell are you acting that way?" Jimin let out a sarcastic laugh. "Mom would be so disappointed at you if she hears. Come on, a teacher of your college Soomi? Really?" </p><p>"You won't tell anything to mom." </p><p>My eyes started to get teary. I was hating this. Jimin was never so harsh to me, maybe when we were younger but we were grown ups now. I could have my own life, just like he had his.</p><p>"Oh, why won't I? You said you aren't dating him, but you do seem and sound like you have feelings for this guy. You really have no clue about the real world, do you? He's not only just a teacher but—" It looked as if Jimin had given up on me as he messaged his temple, looking deeply frustrated. </p><p>"He isn't just a teacher, he's moving away too. This is really fucked up Soomi. He's never going to date you, guys like him— they just take advantage of you! Why would he date a student? Because if he's gone, he's gone. He's out of this place and then he wouldn't have a reason to even think of you. Your first time experiencing something close to romance can't be this!"</p><p>Jimin really was at lose of words. He was deeply disappointed at me but I was more. </p><p>"I'm not dating him nor do I want that. Please, just, shut up. I don't wanna hear from you." </p><p>Saying that, I left the room, running upstairs to my bedroom. My eyes were filled to the brim with tears. I could hear Jimin's voice from downstairs, and quick footsteps of Jungkook who was following me from behind. </p><p>"You're going to stay at home. If you don't want me to tell mom you're going to stay right here tomorrow. I know you don't have any classes." </p><p>Jimin was still yelling and I heard it all. As I kicked on my door loudly for it to close, a hand stopped the door from doing so. It was Jungkook on the other side. </p><p>"Go! I don't want to talk now!" I spat. My whole body shaking as tears made their way down my cheeks. I really didn't want anyone to see me like this. </p><p>"I-I'm really sorry. I never thought he'd get mad. I thought he knew. Didn't we always share everything when we were kids?" Jungkook mumbled making my blood boil even more. </p><p>"Seriously Jungkook? Are you blind? We are not kids anymore! You guys made a group of your own, banishing me from there as soon as your puberty fully started kicking in." I sneered from the other end of the door in anger. </p><p>As I spat out what was inside of me all these years, I realized how lonely I had been. They were my friends, Jimin was a sibling, and they were all around my age, and I for a fact was more in the guy category than a girl, still I was biologically of a different sex. I was never fully a part of the boys, nor was I a part of the girls. </p><p>"You knew my relationship with Namjoon was wrong. And you promised you wouldn't tell anyone," I continued, my voice sounding distant and wavering.</p><p>As I attempted to close the door on his face, he slammed his hands on it again. "Jimin is your brother. From childhood we shared everything. Then later Taehyung joined. I never thought that you weren't a part of us. I always tell you everything because you're as important to me as the others. Even if Jimin didn't know I thought he had some clue. He forced me to say the rest—" </p><p>I had closed the door by then. Still I could hear Jungkook sigh from the other side. </p><p>"I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I really am sorry." </p><p>Sorry wasn't going to cut it. It would never. Because knowing my brother, for how arrogant he was, he would never give in. We were close, yet there was this communication gap between us that started to grow when we started getting older.</p><p>Moreover, what he had just said sounded true. If anyone ever heard about my relationship with Namjoon they'd jump to that conclusion without a doubt. </p><p>
  <i>Not that Namjoon and I had a relationship to begin with anyway...</i>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. Let him go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I never thought Jimin would be like this. </p><p>Right in the living room down the stairs, I could feel him waiting like an animal predator, guarding the door so I wouldn't be able to leave. </p><p>I rolled on my bed as a frustrated, angry groan left my mouth from the pit of my stomach. Why wasn't he hanging out with Taehyung or his friends like the other days? </p><p>I hated how he was meddling with my life. We were both consenting adults, but maybe we never grew from our little bubbles. I thought I was the one who was childish, now I had realized Jimin was too. </p><p>There was another thought running through my mind. Would I have approved if it was Jimin dating a teacher of his college? </p><p>There could be female teachers. Young, and beautiful, and maybe only a few years older than him, but even that thought made me uncomfortable. A teacher was a teacher. As much as I hated it, I couldn't but think Jimin was right from his perspective.</p><p>I fiddled with my phone, unconsciously biting on my lower lip thinking if I should contact Namjoon or not. I wanted to meet him, because after he would leave we would only talk through texts or phone calls. And I was never good at them. </p><p>My phone buzzed with an incoming call, Jungkook's ID popped up. This was the sixth time he had called and casually, I ignored. For the last hour he had been constantly calling me and I wondered what the heck it was, but I was not  curious or forgiving enough to pick it up. </p><p>My phone buzzed again, now for a text. Jungkook again. Rolling my eyes I opened it, not that I was going to reply. </p><p>When I started reading the texts my throat went dry, with each passing second I could feel my body going numb. A bitter taste started to spread through mouth and everything became blurred. </p><p><b>Junkook:</b> I saw professor cha today</p><p><b>Jungkook: </b>I went to college to return a book I borrowed from the library and saw him. He looked fine so I went to talk to him and he said he came back today and can't wait to start taking our classes from tomorrow</p><p><b>Jungkook:</b> then I looked for mr kim and couldn't find him anywhere </p><p><b>Jungkook:</b> I think you should contact him</p><p><b>Jungkook: </b>and I'm sorry. I really am.</p><p>My heart dropped as I read more and more of the texts coming from Jungkook. The phone fell through my shaky fingers, and my stomach coiled. A lump made its way to my throat, threatening to make me throw up everything I had in breakfast. </p><p>Within seconds, I got up and took my hoodie. Slipping it on, I ran for the door, quickly climbing down the staircase and then reaching the front door. </p><p>"Where are you going?" Jimin's voice stopped me right when I was about to leave. </p><p>"None of your business," I stated, calmer than I thought I would be. "Stop interfering with my life. You don't know anything." </p><p>Perhaps there was something in my eyes, something that made him go silent as if he didn't know what to say. Rather his eyes started to soften. </p><p>"I just wanted to say sorry because I was too harsh yesterday. I was worried, and still am. You and this professor of yours—"</p><p>"He's not anymore," I spat with my tone harsh. "The teach he was filling in for joined today. So he's going to leave, maybe, even today. Who knows!" </p><p>My voice cracked at the end of my sentence. I couldn't keep that calm and cool facade on anymore. </p><p>"So go on with your friends, Jimin! Live your life like you always have been. You're just like dad. Don't start to care only now because there's no turning back for me at this point."</p><p>With every second passing by I could feel my heart shattering into bits and bits of pieces and the thought, the thought of not being able to see Namjoon again, spending time with him, talking to him, laughing with him, made me feel nauseated. As if I was in the verge of fainting because being away from him, it hurt so much even just by imagining. </p><p>"Go," Jimin said through his pursed lips, visibily irritated. I knew he loathed our father just as much. And maybe I shouldn't have gone there, but the apology needed to wait for when we had both calmed down. "Tell him to stay in Seoul and get another job or something," he said. </p><p>I frantically wiped my cheeks, wet with fresh tears. I didn't know when I had started crying. </p><p>"He's going to leave anyway," I replied with my lips trembling. Still finding it hard to believe that Jimin had approved. </p><p>Jimin sighed. "Seriously, I wouldn't have worried this much if you dated a girl instead and said you were gay. I always thought that was the case anyway. Whatever, go get him now." </p><p>And so I left. Not even caring that I was wearing pajamas and flipflops. Even with my hoodie on I probably looked like a homeless person. </p><p>As I hurriedly climed up the staircases and reached his place, I was surprised seeing his apartment's door fully open. But what was more shocking that from the outside I could see nothing was there. The couch, table, his books scattered on the floor, nothing. </p><p>"Namjoon?" I hesitantly called out, stepping a foot inside. </p><p>I noticed that a few packed cardboard boxes were lying here and there, but most of the furnitures were gone. "Namjoon, are you there?" </p><p>I started to feel afraid. It was too silent. </p><p>He wouldn't leave me. Not saying a word, he wouldn't leave like that.</p><p>
  <i>But what if he left already?  </i>
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</p><p>That's absurd, he wouldn't leave. He would never leave like that. He was not like my father.</p><p>
  <i>But he wasn't there. </i>
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</p><p>"Soomi? When did you come here?" A jollygood voice made me turn towards the door. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was Namjoon! </p><p>Not wasting another second, I ran and wrapped my arms around him. I then put my head on the circle of his broad chest. Feeling his heartbeat and his warmth in an instance, I couldn't believe that just a moment ago I thought I'd never see him again. </p><p>"A-ah." Namjoon said flustered. "What are you doing Soomi? I almost grabbed the cactus." </p><p>I looked up with my head still brushing on his chest, my arms embracing him. There was indeed a cactus plant in his hand that he was holding further away. So it couldn't harm me. </p><p>"Who gave you that?" I mumbled. With hundreds of questions running through my mind, I couldn't think straight. </p><p>"The landlady. She says I resemble his son, he's in the army now. But hey.." Namjoon lifted up my chin with his other hand, deeply staring at my face. "Were you crying?" </p><p>"No." I let go off him instantly. "I wasn't." </p><p>He stepped closer. "You look like you were crying. Don't lie to me." </p><p>And I looked away. His soft and caring voice, the way he was seeking my answer, every time he did those reminded me of how dadlike he was. </p><p>"Professor Cha came back," I murmured. "I thought you wouldn't tell me and leave like that." </p><p>It wasn't a second until he had bursted out in a soft fit of giggles. "You've read too many cliché stuff Soomi." </p><p>I could only frown at him in reply. </p><p>"Okay, I'm sorry for laughing." He put a hand over his mouth, though his eyes were still small for how he was laughing silently. He held my hand putting the pot down and took me inside, to his bedoom. His bed was still there. </p><p>He made me sit there and sat by my side. Still holding my hand and slowly he interwined his fingers with mine, making me blush red just in a millisecond. </p><p>"Soomi," Namjoon breathed out speaking softly. "I'll leave tomorrow night. I wish I could move the date to the end of this week but my mom can't wait. She wanted me to come home today, that's why almost all the furnitures are gone. She made me sent them as a reassurance. And as much as I look like an adult, my mom still thinks I'm a kid. Believe me or not." Namjoon laughed at the end of his sentence, slightly squeezing my hand. </p><p>"You are a kid," I retorted. With his hand on my hand, I felt calmer. I was sad but there was this warm feeling too. "Come to think of it, I don't know anything about your family." </p><p>"I have a dad, a mom. My dad is a teacher too." Namjoon smiled at me. "I have a sister too, though she's a brat. And I have a dog." </p><p>"I love dogs," I commented letting out a giggle. </p><p>"He's a big and friendly guy. Next time when I visit Seoul I'll bring him with me. I'm sure he'll like you too." </p><p>"You're coming next time right?" That melancholic feeling was coming back yet again. </p><p>He was going to leave. He really was leaving. </p><p>"Of course." Namjoon scrunched up his eyebrows. "Soomi, you really need to stop reading them. Faster than a kiss and stuff like those." </p><p>"What?" My soul, I swore it left my body right there. "Don't tell me you've read that manga." </p><p>"Yeah, I did." Namjoon grinned sheepishly. "I have to say it was not my taste, but I wanted to know more about you. It was cute overall." </p><p>
  <i>Oh no. </i>
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</p><p>"Why did you read that! God! I'm so embarrassed!!" I cried, cringing at myself. I wanted to hit him at that moment. </p><p>"It's okay really." Namjoon cackled. "I know you like those teacher-student manga, and stuff." </p><p>"Oh, shut up!" I snarled at him in response. My ears going red. </p><p>Namjoon only bit on his lips, looking more amused than ever, trying so hard not to laugh. </p><p>After getting a hold of himself he breathed out, playing with my fingers in the meantime. My hand still in his clasp. </p><p>"Soomi, I wanted to tell you this beforehand. I'm working on something. A thesis." He breathed out. "And I'm going to send it to a university in Philadelphia. I really don't know if they'll accept me for their PhD program, but if they do, it would take months. Probably even a year."</p><p>
  <i>First it was his hometown. Now he was saying someday he'll leave for phil-god-damn-delphia. </i>
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</p><p>Even mother nature was against the idea of us being together. That was most probably the case. </p><p>"And I was thinking if you could come with me." Namjoon added. For the second time my soul left my body. </p><p>"What?" I shouted loudly. My eyes so wide, every body cell of mine shooketh. </p><p>"Yeah." Namjoon slowly furrowed his eyebrows at me. "I think it'd be the best if you apply for the scholarship program, if you want. You're a bright student after all. And we can both try this way— don't tell me you were thinking of something else." </p><p>I said nothing in reply and only rolled my lips inside my mouth. Sweating inside. </p><p>"Did you perhaps think it was some kind of I don't know, a marriage proposal?" Namjoon raised an eyebrow. Yet I was silent. </p><p>"Oh my god, you really have read too many stuff like those!" Once again he bursted out laughing. This time harder than ever, he was laughing so hard I thought he'd explode like an atomic bomb and I couldn't bear watching anymore. </p><p>"Argh, I hate you!" I took a pillow that was lying near me and hit him with that. I didn't want to stop, I couldn't. I kept hitting him until he stopped laughing and snatched the pillow away from me. </p><p>And then he cupped my cheeks instead. His hands were so huge they could cover my whole face. The biggest smile spread across his face and with that he laughed. "You look like a grumpy cat when you get angry like this." </p><p><i>Grumpy cat?</i> I puffed my cheeks frowning. Which made him grin harder. </p><p>"You know what? If you wanna get married we can. But first you need to graduate okay?" He teased biting on his full lips. "I didn't know you were so eager to get married." </p><p>"I wheet you." He was cupping my cheeks so hard I couldn't even say it clearly. </p><p>Seeing me struggle he loosened his hold. Still he was staring into my eyes. I couldn't tell what his own eyes were saying. But his hands were so warm, I wanted to be here like this, with him, forever. </p><p>With our gazes locked on each others he leaned in a little. That's when I realized, that I was in his bedroom. On his bed. And no one else was here. </p><p>My heart started beating faster, pumping out more blood than it could ever. I closed my eyes shut. Not caring if something happened, more than a kiss perhaps. I would want that even though I was not ready for it right then. </p><p>But he planted a kiss on my forehead instead. </p><p>My eyes shot open when I felt his soft lips pressed against my forehead. This again, was nothing like I'd ever felt before. Every thing, every feeling I had shared with him were so different from each other. </p><p>When he moved away still staring in my eyes, I felt this warmth in my chest. And I wanted to cry, pour my eyes out because I was so happy to be with him yet sad since he'd be gone soon. </p><p>"You want a ride on my bike this evening?" He smiled, pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear. </p><p>I only nodded as I bit on my lip. Trying my hardest not to cry. And he seemed to understand that. Even though he was smiling, his smile looked despondent. </p><p>"Then do you want to help me now with the packing?" He asked softly. </p><p>I nodded. Still we sat there just holding eachother's hands, not uttering a single word. </p><p>I was never prepared for a goodbye. </p><p>And I still had a lot to know, lot to give him. And a long way to go.</p>
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<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Epilogue</h2></a>
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    <p>
  <b>8 months later</b>
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</p><p>"Oh man holy shit!" Jungkook exclaimed, his doe eyes wider than ever and mouth slightly apart. Same situation with Jimin and Taehyung. </p><p>They were both screaming their lungs out, and I couldn't fathom what they were actually saying since the crowd around us was wilder than ever. Everyone hollering, crying out with the utmost strength of their lungs, and without realizing I had joined them too. </p><p>
  <i>"I love I love I love myself! I know know know myself!" </i>
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</p><p>Namjoon, Hoseok and Yoongi shouted from the stage. Blue lights emitting in the dark place, the trio looking like the stars everyone would wish upon. The audience's eyes were glued to them as they kept on rapping, sweat pouring down their foreheads as they ran around the stage. </p><p>"Ya playa hater you should love yourself!" Namjoon shouted into his mike, again the crowd went loud. </p><p>"Won't there be more!?" Taehyung said frantically glancing back to the stage and us. "I want more!" </p><p>"Maybe some other day!" I yelled against the crazy loudness of the people so he'd be able to hear me. The experience was amazing as always since it was not my first time, watching the trio rap underground on a stage. But it was for Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung. </p><p>"He was cool," Jimin mumbled to me as we were outside now. It was broad daylight right outside when inside, the dark bar resembled a midnight of hustle and bustle. </p><p>"I'm talking about Namjoon," he added. </p><p>That was the reason why I brought him here today, to hear it coming from his own mouth. </p><p>"Gee, really?" I crossed my arms over my chest playfully, not before I had snatched the snapback from his head and wore it myself. "I thought you disliked him, Hyung." </p><p>"Not exactly. But you know..." He rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. Taehyung and Jungkook were still fanboying over the rap performance right beside us. </p><p>"Hey." Namjoon approached us with a bright grin on his face. He was clad in a pastel striped shirt, a white tee underneath, faded blue jeans, and as usual, his nerdy glasses. So unlike before when he was wearing a camouflage jacket, a psychedelic white shirt and ripped white pants.</p><p>
  <i>From daddy to baby in five minutes. </i>
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</p><p>"Did you guys wait too long?" He said letting out a small huff of breath of exhaustion. </p><p>"Mr Kim!" Jungkook grinned from ear to ear. </p><p>"Namjoon hyung!" Taehyung grumbled under his breath. </p><p>For some reasons, Taehyung looked furious, though we could see he was faking it. "When will you guys let me join you? Now you three are even talking about releasing a mixtape together!" He said through his tightly pursed lips. "I'm honestly sad."  </p><p>"We all know you can't rap for your life, Taehyung," Jimin retorted making the boy frown. </p><p>Jungkook chuckled joining Jimin. "Yeah. Apparently, you're not like me who's good at everything." </p><p>I rolled my eyes at the idiotic pair. "You narcissistic moron! He can rap, alright! He just needs improvement." </p><p>"I'll let you join next time Taehyung. Promise." Namjoon scratched the back of his neck saying. "Liar." Taehyung pouted. </p><p>"Oh." Jimin suddenly exclaimed. "Where is Hoseok? I thought I'd ask him if he'd come to the studio this evening." </p><p>The world is small, really small. Because only seven months ago, I had realized my brother Jimin and Hoseok were instructors at the same dance studio. My jaw fell apart right there.</p><p>"Yeah, where is Hoseok and Yoongi by the way?" I asked Namjoon who simply shrugged. </p><p>"Wherever they are, they're probably together," he replied casually. </p><p>Since I had introduced Hoseok to Namjoon and Yoongi months ago, and later when they got closer to each other, Hoseok and Yoongi would always be seen together. Namjoon lived in Ilsan anyway, hence it was normal for the other two to spend more time together.</p><p>"Alright!" Jimin said sarcastically putting his arms over his chest. "I won't be surprised if I hear them dating each other one of these days."</p><p>Namjoon and I shared a glance. Namjoon then scratched the back of his head as he said, "well, Yoongi is gay and he's been single for a good while now."</p><p>Why hadn't I thought of this? I started nodding frantically to myself as I mentally put two and two together. "And Hoseok once told me he didn't have a sexual preference when it came to dating!" </p><p>"That means he's pansexual," Namjoon smiled at me. </p><p>"Good for him," Jungkook mumbled in a soft and low voice. </p><p>"Yeah, good for him," Taehyung agreed. </p><p>"It's still hard for me to acknowledge that Soomi isn't gay," Jimin said as if he was talking to himself. Jungkook and Taehyung gave me a glance and I could tell they were thinking the same.</p><p>"You never know," I winked at them mischievously. "I think I'd be fine if I had found myself falling into no sexual orientation at all. What's better than accepting yourself the way you are?" </p><p>"But you're not into 'no' sexual orientation." Jimin pointed to Namjoon with his eyes. </p><p>I felt Namjoon tugging on the sleeve of my sweatshirt, and I could feel the message he was sending through the small gesture. He was proud of me that I had learnt to accept myself. </p><p>I did fall into that 'no' category, in a sense that I harboured no physical or mental attraction whatsoever until I had met Namjoon. That thing didn't bug me at all.</p><p>Even without the romance, and, or sex part Namjoon would've accepted me, and most importantly, he made me realize I would too.</p><p>
  <i>I was childish, brash, and crazy, but I was okay the way I was. </i>
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</p><p>***</p><p>"Shouldn't you go home now?" Namjoon came out of the shower fully dressed, wearing a oversized sweatshirt and trousers. Seeing that I was a little disappointed. <i>In fanfictions don't they always come out the shower wearing only a towel or bathrobe or something?</i></p><p>
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</p><p>He kept rubbing his hair with a white towel, his half wet hair sticking up to every direction possible. Yet, he looked handsome. I almost drooled on the sight as I sat up from my lying position. </p><p>"You were even lying there." He gave me a quick glance from head to toe. "It's already past midnight, go home Soomi. I'll call an uber"</p><p>"No one's there." I pouted fiddling with my phone. "Home's empty right now."</p><p>"Yeah, but this is a motel. And you're lying on my bed." He stood with arms on his hips, giving me a dead serious expression. </p><p>"So?" </p><p>"So I'm sleepy." He deadpanned. "And tired. We can meet again tomorrow. I'm here for three more days anyway." </p><p>"Alright, you don't wanna hear the thing I wanted to say. You would've been so glad to hear it though. It was a surprise." I shrugged as I started getting up from the bed to leave. </p><p>"Wait, wait." Namjoon gestured his hands at me to sit down again. He quickly approached me but sat on the floor instead of the bed and then looked up at me with big happy eyes, smiling. "Are you finally going to say that you like me today?" </p><p>I was on the side of the bed, sitting there with my legs up, and seeing him staring up at me with that-god-darn glimmering eyes of his almost got me flustered there. </p><p>"Of course not that." I growled. His smile disappeared. </p><p>"I even told you about expensive girl before! Do you know how hard it was for me to come clean about a shitty song I wrote in my horny, teen years?" A crease appeared in the middle of his perfectly shaped eyebrows as he vented. "My friends made fun of me about that for ages. I absolutely despise talking about it." </p><p>I rolled my head upwards, the sudden thought of his song expensive girl and the unholy lyrics veering through my mind. I quickly shook my head to the sides. </p><p>"That still gives me nightmares," I retorted making him frown even more. </p><p>"Yeah, we don't talk about that just like we don't talk about your daddy kinks."</p><p>My eyes went wide, cheeks suddenly becoming warm. "I don't," I protested instantly. </p><p>"You're blushing," he said, amused, putting his hands on the bed and propping his chin on his palms. </p><p>"Shut up!" I tried to yell, but my voice came out meek and low which made him chuckle in his deep voice, looking more entertained than ever. </p><p>"Hmm.. So what did you want to say?" His eyes twinkled, biting on his full lips he asked. </p><p>
  <i>Such a tease!</i>
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</p><p>I looked away, too nervous and shy to keep my eyes on his. "I got accepted in a university in Philadelphia. It's in your area." </p><p>"You.. what?!" Namjoon shouted straightening up in his sitting position. "Why are you only telling me this now! Wow I-" </p><p>"Yeah." I nodded. "I'm pretty amazing." </p><p>"I'm—" Namjoon looked like he was in lose of words. "That's such a great news!" He said suddenly slapping his cheeks with both of his hand and he stayed like that, his face squished by his hands. Then he looked up at me again.</p><p>"I-I can't believe it Soomi. And on the right time! I can't believe we can be there together!" </p><p>Seeing him so happy like a child, as if they had gotten the gift they always wanted for Christmas, almost made me tear up. </p><p>"Where is it! Which university!" He asked, still looking puzzled.</p><p>That's when I started smirking sneakily, as if I had the biggest plans in my hands. </p><p>"Your one," I replied with a smug look on my face. "The one you're going to work at." </p><p>Namjoon's eyes slowly went wide, and wider. His jaw rolling on the tiled floor. "You mean?" </p><p>"Yeah." I shrugged. "We would have to continue as a student and teacher yet again." </p><p>Namjoon was so shocked he couldn't say anything. He kept quite for the time being, albeit his mouth hung open, his eyes pouring out of his sockets as if he couldn't process all of this. </p><p>"What?" I snapped my fingers at him. </p><p>"You sneaky little-" He brawled. From his look, I could see he was actually happy inside. </p><p>I lowered my head, matching my eye level to his. Then I leaned in, closing the gap between us so quickly that his face went from shocked to a flustered one. </p><p>"Well, shouldn't I keep an eye on my prey?" I saw him gulp hard as I said, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down with that. "I should keep an eye on you so you don't fall for anyone else." </p><p>Saying that I traced my fingers on his collarbone, inching closer to his face, his eyes were glued to my lips. </p><p>But I moved back with that, his motorbike keys dangling in my hand. </p><p>"Really? You took a shower with the keys so I couldn't steal it?" </p><p>He was stunned for a second but then his face got washed with disappointment which soon, turned into a scowl. </p><p>"Yep." I jumped up from the bed, excitedly making my way towards the door to leave but before that I looked back again. "I'm driving the bike today. You're sitting behind me." </p><p>I then showed him the keys, waving them in the air playfully. "Let's go teacher-nim, and maybe someday you’ll actually understand that me telling you to go on a bike ride with me at midnight, is also a form of me telling you that maybe, I do like you."</p>
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